THE TASKS I HAVE TO DO VOLUME 1

I WORK A GRAVEYARD SHIFT AT THE GRAVEYARD

Note: This one is a bit different but still fun nonetheless. Enjoy
Status: incomplete
Graveyard shifts aren't that great. But you know what's worse? A graveyard shift at the graveyard. Yeah, you heard me right. But that's exactly what the system assigned me. Whatever let's just check out the tasks and get it over with.

Task 1 : SURVIVE NIGHT 1 ( 3 Hours )

SURVIVE?! THE HELL THEY MEAN BY SURVIVE?! NAH THIS SEEMS WRONG, BRO. Nah, Joan, just stay calm. Stay calm. I might be overreacting. It's prolly nothing. 
The first two hours pass without incident. Phew! See? I was just overreacting. I keep patrolling the graveyard which is kinda getting boring, now. I kick the gravel in frustration. Stupid-ass-task!
But then, quite suddenly, I hear a giggle. Huh? What the shit? I look around and my eyes alight on a little boy standing beside a tombstone, just chillin' like a villain.
The boy seems around 10 or something. He's wearing a yellow raincoat(which makes zero sense cause it ain't even raining yo) and his hair covers most of his face. He giggles again. Holy geez, whoever said that children laughing is music to the ears must be a nutjob cause this chigga laughs like a horse with rabies.
"Whatchu ass laughing about, boy? Why yo here at this time? Yo want me to bomb you? Go! Getcho ass out here. Go run to yo mama, little boy", I snap and slap him over the head. Then something HORRID happens. HIS EYES POP OUT OF HIS SOCKETS!
 Gang, I think I slapped him too hard. I scream like a deranged little girl.
But then, this odd thing happens, his hair parts, and his lips curve into a smile. He slowly starts....levitating. What the- My heart starts pounding. Nah this shit ain't it. I break into a run with my arms in the air. The boy's horse-like giggles echo through the graveyard.
I look over my shoulder and I see the chigga chasing me on all fours, laughing like an ass. WHY IS BRO CHASING ME? Then, I start to wonder. If I die right now, I'd respawn BUT I'd probably get an F. But I wasn't gonna let this little asshole chase me. Nah, who does he think he is?
I turn back in a fit of fury. With all the strength I can muster, I kick him so hard his neck twists a complete 360⁰- exorcist style. I draw back and run again. The idiot who now has trouble looking where he's heading because of his major neck trauma, runs into a tombstone. I hear a CRACK! I dunno if it's the tombstone or the chigga's skull but for all I know I don't care.
There's a beep and then there's a flash....YES, I MADE THROUGH THE NIGHT. 
OK, WHATS THE SECOND TASK?

Task 2.   SURVIVE NIGHT 2

You got to be kidding me. But this time the system gave me a baseball bat and boxing gloves. Hmmm not bad.
Once again, the first few hours pass without incident. Then, all of a sudden, the atmosphere becomes tense, and fog reigns supreme over the graveyard. My grip tightens around the baseball bat but my boxing gloves make it hard to do so. FRICKIN GLOVES! 
Giggles and horse-like laughter prick my ears. Not prick- Rape. Like this one is even more horrible. But this time, it's a mixture of chuckles....this couldn't only mean one thing.
I gulp and squint my eyes. Upon narrowing my eyes, I see two figures.
The same boy from last night but this time the little thugs accompanied by a little girl. The boy is chillin on the floor, with his legs crossed and eyes closed. Is the idiot doing yoga?
The girl, however, is playing with a rubber ball...all by herself which I personally find extremely pathetic. The boy notices me and instantly springs to his feet.
"I WILL BREAK YO FACE, CHIGGA", I say pointing the bat towards him. To my surprise, he doesn't attack at all. He just stares at me. And that's when I realize. He only attacks when provoked. Ohhhhhhh so this makes it so much easier.
My heart returns to its original pace. I return back to patrolling the graveyard. 
Ok 30 minutes remain, but this shit boring as hell, man. AND THEIR FRICKIN LAUGHTER IS GETTING ON MY FRICKIN NERVES. 
True enough they haven't attacked but they're FREAKIN ANNOYING ME. NAH NO BODY ANNOYS ME AND LIVES.
I walk over to them. 
"AY SHUCHO ASS UP AND STOP YO ANNOYING CRACKED LAUGHTER!", I say. But to my upmost horror, they IGNORE me. The girl keeps on playing with her rubber ball. The nerve of that little- I snatch the ball out of her hands. With all the force I can muster, I throw it as far as I can. YEAHHH SUCK THAT BOI! Their pathetic eyes follows the trajectory of the rubber follow, until the ball disappears. I laugh at the suckers. Who were they to ignore me? I feel a savage triumph in bullying these dork ass demons. I smirk at them. But my happiness doesn't last long 'cause the next second I'm running like an Olympic athlete, with two demon children on the prowl.
Like a pro parkourist I jump over  tombstones while the freaks chase me like baby zombies from Minecraft. I pull myself over the fence and land on the other side, gasping and wheezing. 
I laugh as I see them struggling to get over the fence. 
"HAHAHAHAAH YOU LITTLE SUCKERS! YO THINK YO CAN CLIMB THAT, YOU OBSESE MIDGETS? YOU GUYS LOOK LIKE OFFBRAND LORAX AND MARIO! GO FIND YOUR POT OF GOLD MIDGETS", i laugh, gasping for breath. Ahhhh, those idiots.
Then I get the shock of my life. The boy nods at the girl and gives her a JUMP boost... like what?
OH MA GOD MAN! The little girl cracks her knuckles( she lets out a whimper. I think she broke her knuckles) and her eyes start glowing red. What the sigma? Is she a werewolf or some shit?
With zero hesitation, I swing the bat. Frick child abuse. These are demons we are talkin about. But dayum man, this Lil gangsta is made of stronger stuff cause the bat just snaps in two.
My mind takes a minute to process that and heart takes another minute to let the horror digest in.
I punch her with skills to rival Mike Tyson but nah man, she doesn't crack unlike my fists that is.
I kick her, I push her but no effect. All the while, she just stands there looking at me as if I'm mad or something. Ok time to bail. I bolt just as she lunges at me. This time I don't look back. I ignore the growls and run. I run for my dear life. YESSSS THE SECURITY CONTROL CABIN! I dive inside and shut the metal door. I push myself against it. 
Princess Crazy Ass finds it hard to control her momentum and there's a loud CLANG as she slams into the iron doors. OOF! I can make out the outline of her figure imprinted onto the metal walls. Dang...that's one deep dent.
There's a beep which signals the end of task 2.