Don't You Get It? ✅

1 am Thoughts

/i am sorry for this in advance./

there is a price over my head,

people will only laugh at my death bed,

bad days just come and go,

much of them spent searching high and low,

just to find someone who gets me,

to be able to admit things without worrying about awful greed,

i've made mistakes,

i have broke more than just some leave piling rakes,

it isn't that hard to rid yourself of all these thoughts,

that has your stomach tied in knots.

i still miss you and i actually love you,

but will anyone actually believe that is true,

will anything make sense to them if i just admit it,

admit it and just lose all of that wit,

say secrets that i've held even from that one,

it isn't like there is a trophy or medal to be won,

we are all on the edge of our seats to know each other's entire story,

they want to know if it starts with a 'she' or a 'he',

but it is none of that,

no one is ready for any of that,

what time is it,

do you think you have time to come over and just sit,

just sit and let me tell you all i forgot to say before you died,

tell you all the things that to others i would've lied,

by the way happy birthday,

right in that 8 year old coffin you lay,

what would you say to me right now,

would you just ask me 'how',

there would be no care for the 'she' or 'he',

it would all be about would this person be my to-be,

i miss you.

you never judged me for my feelings on the she's, he's, and they's,

that is what you would always do.

then there's you that always got that precious little smile,

now i might be able to witness it while you're walking down the aisle,

you're so beautiful but you can't see it,

even with the brightest lights lit,

yet you continue to ruin yourself with all these bad guys,

and torturing yourself with all these inner lies,

let me love you,

because i want to move on from missing her to loving you,

i love her as well but her time has passed,

and that period is long has lasted,

why can't i have enough guts just to spit it out,

and just tell her without a single doubt.

i miss you, and i love you,

these two people need to pay their dues,