Itty Bitty Sinners -Oneshots, Ficlets, and More

The duck Story

Possum: Listen! I know this is stupid!

But I wrote this for fun when I discovered there's a 4th Duck song. Lol

As a kid I would sing this song- On Repeat!

And then I thought...what If Lucifer sang the duck song as obnoxiously as I did?

Here you go! :)

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Lucifer was an adorable little.

The other members loved his sass, his spunk, and his kind heart.

But every little has their quirks that some may find...nettlesome.

For Lucifer this was obsessing over a single TV show or book or song for a long period of time and only exclusively watching, singing or talking about said things.

And most begin and end with...ducks.

Lucifer loves ducks! More than anything really.

For the last couple of months Lucifer has been grabbing his guitar and playing the duck song to the members of the hotel.

He started with Charlie of course. Who better to share the greatest song ever with?

He walked up to her happily while she was working on a lesson plan for the next day. "A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man runnin' the stand: Hey! Bum Bum Bum, Got any grapes?"

Charlie raised an eyebrow at her father (who was very obviously regressed) "I'm sorry, what?" She asks him.

"Got any grapes?" Lucifer repeats, he's holding his little guitar, continuing to play it, waiting patiently for her answer.

"I think so?" Charlie says. "Let's go check in the kitchen." She suggests to him.

Lucifer looks at her like she's the one making no sense now and sings: "I'll pass."

Charlie tilts her head and Luci starts to walk away, singing: "Then he waddled away, waddle waddle, till the very next day Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum ba dom."

Charlie honestly had no idea what he was singing, but she soon found out by looking up the few lyrics she remembered.

She definitely wasn't surprised by what she found.

She knew that Lucifer was sure to pester the others with his new obsession...and she thought maybe she should warn them but...

It was much more fun just to leave it alone and see what happens.

The next time Lucifer regressed, he once again grabbed out his guitar and started playing it while he sang to a member of the hotel: "When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man runnin' the stand: Hey! Bum Bum Bum, got any grapes?"

Angel raised an eyebrow: "Grapes? No, why?"

Lucifer replied: "The duck said. Goodbye."

Angel was still confused as Lucifer continues to sing as he walks away: "Then he waddled away, waddle waddle.Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. 'Til the very next day! Bum Bum Bum Bum ba da dam."

Lucifer waddles over to Husk the next time he regresses:

"When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand

And he said to the man runnin' the stand: Hey! Bum Bum Bum. Got any grapes?" Lucifer asks.

Husk actually did have some grapes in his mini fridge behind the counter. "Uh yeah, here you go." He puts some in a bowl for Lucifer and hands it to him as the kid continues to play his guitar.

Lucifer sings: "The duck said: "How about...no."

Husk raises an eyebrow. "I thought you said-"

Lucifer leaves, singing: "Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. 'Til the very next day! Bum Bum Bum Bum ba da dam!"

By now, everyone was aware of Lucifer's new obsession with the dreaded duck song.

This month alone they could tell when Lucifer was regressed when they started to hear his little guitar start to play.

"The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man runnin' the stand: Hey! Bum Bum Bum got any grapes?"

Alastor slowly turned his head to the small king, his smile still present as his antlers grow and neck stretches out threateningly. "Lucifer, if I have to hear that song again, I will blow a fuse and destroy this beautiful hotel!"

Lucifer is not at all phased as he sings: "The duck said, Adios!"

Lucifer then leaves, room, once again, singing: "Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle."

But Alastor decides this will not stand! He will think of a way to stop the king from playing that ridiculous song!

But how?

Lucifer approached Vaggie the next time he was regressed: "When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man runnin' the stand: Hey! Bum Bum Bum. Got any glue?"

"What?" Vaggie asks.

"Got any glue?" Lucifer repeats, smiling that someone finally knew the next line to the song.

"I thought the duck wanted grapes." Vaggie says, confused.

...

He was a bit disappointed that Vaggie didn't actually know the words, but he didn't let it get him down. "Then one more question for you..." Lucifer sings: "Got any grapes? Bum Bum Bum ba ba-"

"Lucifer." Alastor interrupts, suddenly appearing in front of the two. "I have something for you."

Lucifer tilts his head. "What is it."

Alastor uses magic to make a flower crown appear out of nowhere.

But this was not just any flower crown. No no. This crown was surrounded by not only beautiful daisies, but rubber ducks.

Lucifer gasps and reaches for it.

But Alastor pulls it away. "Ah ah ah. Wait a minute. You can only have this if you agree to stop singing that wretched Duck song."

Lucifer hums, considering."So, I can have it if I stop singing the duck song one?" Lucifer asks him.

Alastor smiles wider. "Precisely."

"Okay! Deal!" Lucifer says, taking the crown and putting it on his head happily.

Alastor smiles proudly. "You're all welcome."

Lucifer was thrilled as well, he was going to cherish this crown forever! Alastor has never given him something before, and he absolutely loves it!

The next day they hear the guitar playing again: "A duck walked up to the corner store and he said to the woman, running the store: Hey! Bum bum bum, got any grapes?"

Alastor's eyes turn to diles as he turns to Charlie. "There are two duck songs?!"

"Pretty sure there's four of them actually." Charlie answers.

"Curses..." Alastor mumbles angrily, but he immediately calms himself down. "It's alright. I will figure this out. No one bothered me until then!" He tells them, walking upstairs to his room.

Lucifer was still happily playing his tune, flower crown perfectly on his head: "Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. Then he waddled away, waddle waddle. Till the very next day...."

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HAPPY FATHERS DAY!!!