Eternal Ardor

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I S H A A N

I hate Sundays. It's difficult to act as if I am sleeping when Dadi and that man keeps coming to check if I am sleeping.

I did sleep quite well last week but I can't sleep again. I keep thinking about it and I didn't even realise it's morning. Ever since I have been diagnosed with acute insomnia they all keep checking on me.

I get up, freshen up and head down for breakfast. Today marks the 5 year death anniversary of my mother. I can never forget that day..

-Flashback-
( 2011 - Ishaan aged 10 )
It was a stormy night that day. Heavy rain, lighting and thunder storm. Mama and Papa are always busy with work. I wanted to surprise them with a cake so I asked cook uncle to teach me.

Cook uncle and I were making chocolate cake that's when mama and papa entered the house. I ran to greet them but they are screaming at each other.

"I know I have done a big mistake at least don't scream here"
"Why shouldn't I scream when you have disgusted me enough. How dare you do this to me"
"Please don't scream Ishaan will hear"
"Let him also know his father is planning on getting a new mother for him"
"That's not what I wanted to do. I am sorry for what I did"

The maid aunty is asking me to go to my room but I don't want to. What are my parents talking about. Why are they screaming at each other.

My mother looks at me and sees me with a smile. She calls me to give her a hug and I run. She holds my hand and takes me to her room and locks it.

"You will be a good boy right baby?"
"Yes mama"
"Always remember to never lose the trust of someone you love. Never let go of someone so easily"

She kisses my forehead and makes me sleep on her lap. Even if mama was busy at work she always made time for me. But today I didn't understand what she was telling me. She seems very sad and I don't know how to ask her.

I sleep off on her lap and I woke up in the morning lying on bed. Mama is still sleeping. She usually wakes up early and I try waking her up but she is not waking up.

I cry banging the door as mama locked it yesterday.

"Shaan beta" dadi calls for me out of the door.
"Dadi mama is not waking up" I scream crying and the room is locked
"Go near the bed quickly" my dad says and I do it.

I can hear someone stomping the door with their leg. My dad enters and immediately goes to my mother. I go near dadi hugging her as I cry.

Papa lifts mama to take her to the hospital and a bottle falls down. A sleeping tablet bottle that is empty.

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I hate my mother for leaving me here. I had to change my school, leave my old friends and stay alone for several nights.

She could have taken me with her or maybe we could just leave this house. We didn't need any of this. What's the point of being rich when there is no one to talk to.

I was very close to Dadi until she moved to her brother's house since he is sick. She comes here only to see if I am alive or no.