Linked AU One-Shots

1. Time To Cook

This was a sprint with the prompt "cook." I had exactly one hour and wrote the entire time. 

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"Who's turn is it?" Wind whispered as he leaned in to Time, his eyes darting around the group. He couldn't help but feel a pit in his stomach as he studied each one of the others. Warriors had his turn this morning, he was certain of that. Legend had taken care of it the night before. He began to feel almost as though he was being choked as he began to suspect more and more that...

"It's not mine." Time whispered back. Even though he was usually pretty good at keeping his emotions in check, Wind caught the worried look in his eyes as he subconsciously looked at what might as well be a monster in that moment. It certainly made Wind's fingers twitch for his sword at least, even though the danger was one not even the Master Sword could evade.

"It's Roolie's turn to cook." Twilight spoke up from the other side of the fire, startling the youngest Hero. How had he even heard the two of them, anyway? He had hardly heard Time, and he was right next to them! He glanced at the old man, who had visibly flinched.

"Oh, it's my turn?" Hyrule asked, his face lighting up as most of the others darkened instead. He chuckled to himself as he exclaimed, "I almost forgot!"

Legend elbowed Twilight right in the stomach as hard as he could, putting on a not-terrified grin as the other broke into a coughing fit. "Oh, I almost did too! That would have been bad -- but uh, if you're too tired to--"

"Are you being nice?" Warriors scoffed. He thought that he'd never see the day, unless maybe it was to save his life. But then again, maybe this was a life threatening situation after all. "I mean-- You did use up quite a bit of energy healing Four, so maybe you should rest."

But to each of their horrors, Hyrule actually crouched down to set up the pot over the fire. "No, I'll be alright. Thanks, though." He beamed.

"Er-- what if I help you?" Four asked reluctantly, raising his hand in a way that made his shoulder pang with pain. If this was inevitable, at least maybe he could soften the blow. A few others nodded encouragingly.

But the Hero only shook his head. "I've got it. You should rest; don't want to strain your deltoid any more than you have to. Besides, I've got such a great idea!" He grinned as though he didn't have a care in the world. As though he wasn't just about to end it with his two hands that now carried innocent-looking ingredients.

"Well, if you're going to make dinner, then I'm going to offer up my evening prayers in the meantime." Sky sighed, getting up from his spot.

"Oh, I thought you just got back from them?" Hyrule hummed as he added one last thing to the pot and began to stir.

Sky's eyes shifted. "I have decided that I need to ask for... more protection."

"You mean in battle?"

"No-- I mean yes!" And the Hero nearly dashed off.

"That idiot better be back for dinner." Legend grumbled under his breath as he set his feet up on the stump in front of him. If the rest of them had to deal with this mess, so did Sky.

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"My dearest, blessed Hylia, I pray for your esteemed guidance and wisdom in these trying times. You see, my Goddess, the Hero of Hyrule has once again taken it upon himself to ready one of our meals to empower our bodies and minds for the trials that lay ahead. I understand that you, highest of high, have blessed us, guiding us to the ingredients that allow us to survive another day. You have my utmost gratitude for providing us with our daily needs. It is because your tenderness and care that you watch over us, and lead us where we are to go. But my Goddess -- you must understand-- your hero, the Hero of Hyrule, has been tainted with what can only be described as a curse. He obtains the most wonderful ingredients and what he creates with them -- they, well, in my most dire time of need I once have taken the meals of the servants of Demise. Demise knows no bounds in its wickedness, this I know well, even in its cooking. And yet, my Goddess, somehow the Hero of Hyrule makes the crumbs of the most gruesome bits of the food from Demise's servants seem like sweet, sweet blessings the likes of which I have never known. My Goddess, please, spare me from his hand! If there is some injustice I have caused against you that requires repentance, if this is a punishment from you above, please inform me so that I may turn from my wicked ways. I am your humble servant; you know this. I am at your very command. Please spare us all mercy and -- if I may be so forward... None of your other esteemed Heroes-- myself included-- know how to transform the food you provide us into edible substance. You know that I am faithful to you. You know that I do my best to use what I have been given, and I am glad for the companionship from seven other of your chosen. You bless me greatly, and I try to not ask for more. But my Goddess... All my heart longs for is one single person in this damned group to know how to cook! I mean, come on, you'd think out of eight people there'd be one?! All I ask is for one new member! One who can cook! He doesn't even have to know how to hold a sword, I just want to eat again without worrying that something will come crawling out of my mouth!"