Working as a Simp

Part 2

4

The campus forum incident was most likely Lu Xue's doing.

She liked Jiang An and, knowing I delivered meals to him every day, decided to compete.

Jiang An had received her homemade cookies and salted egg yolk pastries.

...Which Boss Jiang mistook for my cooking.

He handed me the pink lunchbox, "Don't make them again. I almost broke a tooth. The tiramisu you made before was much better."

I explained awkwardly, "I didn't make these, Boss. Look, there's a card in the bag. It's probably from someone who has a crush on you."

Jiang An frowned, "From someone else?"

I nodded.

He laughed, both annoyed and amused, "Lin Wan Yue, if someone sends me food, what does that mean?"

"That... you're handsome?"

"No," he crossed his arms, "it means she's taking over part of your job. You should worry about your maid position being threatened."

I was alarmed.

"But Boss, if someone confesses to you, it's not really my responsibility, is it...?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" He glanced at me coolly, "You're officially my simp. Shouldn't you handle rival issues? Or is my salary not enough?"

"It's enough, it's enough! How about this, if anyone confesses to you in the future, I'll go talk to her and make her give up the idea, okay?""

"Suit yourself."

If you take someone's money, you must solve their problems.

But a few minutes later, Jiang An handed me a big basket of love letters.

"I don't know who wrote these. Take care of them."

I roughly estimated there were about a hundred.

Um...

This seemed like a massive task.

Jiang An was about to leave.

I grabbed him.

"Boss Jiang! Wait, regarding the rival issue, I think we need a long-term plan."

5

Jiang An's birthday was approaching.

My roommates suddenly asked me what gift I had prepared for him.

I hadn't planned on giving him a gift, since I was only a fake simp and didn't really like him.

But then I thought... maybe I should curry favor with the boss.

Workplace relationships must be managed well. How could I not give a gift for the boss's birthday?

My roommates surrounded me, chattering in my ear.

"Wan Wan, you can't let Lu Xue outshine you."

"I heard she's going all out for Jiang An's birthday this time!"

"Rumor has it she's making a brooch by hand, using real jewels, super expensive!"

I got a headache.

Spending a lot of money on a gift for Jiang An was out of the question.

Wasn't this putting the cart before the horse?

So, I posted a thread: "Guys, my boss's birthday is coming up, what kind of gift should I get?"

The replies were all suggestions like "gold bars," "two bottles of Maotai," and "Tieguanyin tea." [1]

Something seemed off.

So I posted again: "Guys, my secret crush's birthday is coming up, what gift should I get? PS: He's super rich, I'm super poor, please recommend something cheap."

This time, the replies were all mockery.

"Do you have a screw loose? Chasing a handsome guy when you're broke?"

"Poor and stingy."

Amidst the criticisms, I found one lifesaving comment.

"Give something handmade, like a knitted scarf."

Knitting a scarf was indeed a good idea—cheap and practical.

But the problem was, I had no time!

So I turned to the all-powerful Taobao.

I typed: "handmade scarf knitting service."

...They actually had it.

You could even choose between beginner and expert.

I ended up choosing the beginner package.

The seller guaranteed that the weaving would be crooked and uneven, ensuring at first glance that it was clearly handmade.

6

I swore, I only wanted to use that ugly scarf to show my loyalty to Jiang An.

Who could have thought... he would actually wear it around his neck?

Dude, was the beige LV scarf I had dry cleaned for you last week not soft enough?

Or were the two Burberry plaid scarves I ironed for you a few days ago not fashionable enough?

Why did you put a 29.9 yuan hand-knitted pumpkin-colored chunky cable scarf from Taobao below your noble head?

To make up for it, I quickly ordered a 69.9 yuan expert-knitted scarf package.

When Jiang An received the second scarf, his expression was complicated.

"Don't knit anymore in the future."

Only then did I notice that his neck had some red rashes.

God! Could the 29.9 yuan synthetic fiber scarf have caused an allergic reaction on his noble neck?

I had really messed up.

So, I bought some ointment and presented it to him with both hands: "I'm sorry!"

Jiang An remained aloof, showing no intention of taking it.

I waited for a long time before he finally spoke.

"Lin Wan Yue, what are you waiting for? Do you expect me to apply it myself?"

I gave a small "oh," quickly unscrewed the cap, and scooped out a dollop of cooling ointment.

I gently applied it to his reddened skin, accidentally brushing against his Adam's apple.

Jiang An suddenly swallowed hard: "Um, maybe I should do it myself."

But as I left, I noticed his ears were red as if they were about to bleed.

Footnote:
[1] These are popular gifts for an older boss in China. Maotai (茅台) is a type of Chinese liquor, and Tieguanyin (铁观音) is a type of tea leaves.