A Collection of Poems and Writings of a Madwoman

Don't Tell Me You Love Me

Don't tell me you love me

If you don't really mean it,

Not in the way I think you do,

Not in the way forever whispers-

Soft and steady, like a promise,

Unbroken by the winds of time.

When I see you, the world tilts right,

Your kindness is the north star,

Your touch, the warmth of a sunlit dawn.

You open doors, both literal and unseen,

And I think, maybe you're the one

Who can mend what's been undone.

I never thought I'd crave the cringey things-

Tickle fights and forehead kisses,

Slow dances in the kitchen

And holding hands like love-struck teens.

But with you, it feels right,

Like I've found the piece I didn't know I was missing.

You make me believe

That the little things are the big things,

That love doesn't have to hurt to be real.

You never ask me to change,

To fit into some mold of who you think I should be.

You see me-the real me-

Messy, scarred, imperfect, raw.

And still, you stay.

You don't try to shape me into someone new;

You only hold me closer,

As if I'm already enough.

That's what scares me the most-

That someone like you

Could love someone like me.

You make me feel safe,

Like I can finally exhale the breath

I didn't know I was holding.

In every word you speak,

In every breath you take,

You heal the broken pieces of me,

Bit by bit,

Without even trying.

But the past is a shadow

That stretches long and dark,

It whispers doubts,

Sings songs of love that withered

When the petals of youth fall away.

Will you still love me

When I'm no longer young and beautiful,

When time traces its map upon my face?

You feel too perfect,

Too much like a dream I can't believe in.

What if you're a mirage,

A fleeting ghost of hope?

My heart knows how to break,

And I don't think I could survive again.

So tell me it's real-

Tell me this is the love

That doesn't falter,

That holds me close when storms rage.

Show me you'll love me,

Not for who I was,

But for who I'll become beside you.

I'm scared of the way my heart races,

Afraid that you'll disappear in the night,

Like all the others did-

With promises I thought were true,

But lost in the noise of empty words.

Your gentle touch, your smile that never fades,

Are they enough to quiet the fear that speaks so loudly?

I want to believe in you,

In us,

But there's a war inside me-

A battle between hope and hurt.

I reach for you,

But the past pulls me back,

Reminds me of the wreckage left behind

By those who said they loved me,

Then left me with nothing but scars.

And yet, here you are,

A beacon in the storm,

Unwavering, strong, and certain.

But my heart can't stop questioning,

Can't stop asking if it's all a dream,

If love like this is even possible,

Or if I'm simply too broken

To trust that it's real.

So don't tell me you love me

If you don't mean it,

Because I'm too fragile to take the fall again.

Show me-

Show me every day with your actions,

That you're here to stay,

That this love is the one that won't break.

And when the years pass by,

When we're older,

And I'm no longer young and beautiful,

Will you still look at me with those eyes,

The ones that see me as I am,

Not a memory of who I once was?

Will your love remain,

Still soft and steady,

The way it feels now?

I want to believe.

I want to trust in this,

In you,

In the future we could have together.

But first, I need to know

That you'll love me,

Even when I'm not perfect.

Even when I'm not who I used to be.