The Blinding

Chapter 23 - Tissa

Unfortunately, it seemed that Samakaab had returned to his old serious and brooding ways despite the revelations of the night before. No matter; I suspected he would come around eventually. Although he might have overshared, he seemed to enjoy spending time with Hani and me.
Today marked the first day of my work with Idil and Beydan. After some light cleaning in the lobby, I washed up and got dressed for the rest of my day. I chose my shabby work baati, figuring that working with children could get messy.
Once I arrived, Beydan greeted me cheerfully and offered me a cup of coffee. It was still early, and they appeared to be in the middle of a late breakfast. Idil sat with the children and attempted to feed them bits of beer and laxoox. The younger child seemed to reject the slimy bits of liver, and I could relate. It wasn't my favorite breakfast food either. I chuckled to myself as I recalled Iftin constantly admonishing me for being so picky. "Beggars can't be choosers," she used to say. A pang of sorrow hit me along with the memory. I missed Iftin terribly and hoped she was doing well in the palace. Sometimes, I wondered if I would ever see her again. But those thoughts only drove me to a depressed state. I couldn't even bring myself to think of Loyaan and the way I left him. That guilt had stayed with me since.
"Something on your mind, girl?" Idil asked, shaking me out of my thoughts.
"No, nothing," I replied, only just registering that I still held the coffee in my hand. Idil eyed me curiously, and I took a sip to let the moment pass.
"Well, I'm off," Beydan said, kissing each of her children on the cheek. "Enjoy your day," she said cheerfully. She walked out of the door, and like clockwork, both of the kids began to cry. It started off low, their volume growing in a second. I stared at them appalled and dithered about what to do.
Idil saw my face and laughed loudly. "You have much to learn, my dear," she chuckled, holding both of the children to comfort them. "This is an everyday occurrence. You might as well get used to it."
What had I gotten myself into? I knew nothing about childcare.
"They just need a little consolation. There, there," she soothed the babes. "Your mother will be home soon."
In a few minutes, their cries died down. Again, I wasn't sure of where to begin. Do we play with them? Do we just watch them? Better to ask than to make an ass of myself, I gathered.
"Tell me, Idil, what do we do with them?" She gave me an amused look.
"The children entertain themselves for the most part. You simply have to watch over them. Grab those toys, will you?" she ordered, nodding her head towards the little wooden objects under the dining table. She sat the kids down on a small, colorful rug in the corner and handed them the toys I carried.
We took a seat not too far away, and I looked on as their imagination took over. The toddler, Asli, ruled whatever game they were playing, bossing around the younger Awil, who only babbled and put the toys in his mouth, drooling all over them.
The day passed slowly but peacefully. Idil shared tales of her youth with me. According to her, she was somewhat of a beauty in her younger days, and if her stories were even a little true, she was right. Idil used her magic throughout the day to entertain both me and her grandkids. I watched in wonder as she waved her hands, and images appeared on the walls, tables, and even on paper. It was as though she was drawing without a pen.
I had never experienced the warmth of a family, and although Iftin was a mother figure, spending the day with loved ones doing nothing but passing time was serene. I imagined myself in Asli's tiny shoes, with parents who loved me and perhaps a doting grandmother like Idil. Maybe my parents would have had more children, and I would've grown up playing with them, just as Asli was doing. For all I knew, my siblings were out there now, oblivious to my existence, just as much as I was oblivious to theirs. I might never know.
By the time Beydan returned, I was well-acquainted with Asli and Awil. I had joined in on their fun after lunch. Both of them climbed on my back while I did my best impression of a camel. I was surprised at how easily I blended in. At the castle, there was never any time for merriment. Aside from following Batuulo around, there was no opportunity.
Beydan walked through the door later in the afternoon, exclaiming, "Hi, babies!" in her jolly baby voice. The kids clung to her, forgetting Idil and me. "Well, how was your day?" she inquired. We gave her a short briefing, and she dropped her things, slouching into the ripped, golden velvet armchair in the corner. Idil showed me how to put the kids down for a nap, and Beydan had tea waiting for us once we returned.
I sipped my tea and worked through my emotions, striving to calm them so that Beydan wouldn't sense my mood. I guess I failed because she was gazing at me as if she had already read my thoughts. Instead of telling me what I was feeling, she simply held my hand in hers. "Our family is your family," she said. "You are welcome here."
I wiped a tear from my eye and smiled at her. No words needed to be spoken.