Angel Grace and Lilin Heart

A Weight Off his Shoulders

"Ah, morning!"

His addressee turned, smiling back at him. "Good morning, Ikari-kun. I'm glad you came."

Shinji approached a little meekly, stroking his hair. It was a nervous tick he'd developed quite recently. "Yeah... I'm sorry I woke up late today; I guess I just couldn't sleep."

Kaworu's eyes narrowed slightly, looking more tender. "That's alright, I don't mind." He continued to gaze at Shinji as he sat down on the piano bench beside him. "You've been having difficulty sleeping recently, haven't you?"

Shrugging, Shinji brushed his hair back, out of the way. "Yeah... it's mostly nightmares like I told you before. But honestly, this isn't helping me a lot either." He tugged at his hair, collecting it all in a fist at the back of his neck. "It gets so hot, and every time it brushes my skin, it gives me the creeps."

"Hmm..." Kaworu passively moved his hand so that a strand of Shinji's hair passed through his fingers. Goosebumps formed over his tan arms. "It must be difficult to manage it all."

Shinji shrugged. "Well, kind of. It takes a while to brush, but at least I found a comb in the showers. It'd probably drive me even crazier if I couldn't brush it." He groaned. "Though... it takes forever to dry. I cleaned it last night, and it still feels a little damp."

Kaworu smiled indulgently, staring down at the strand of Shinji's hair in his fingers. "Yes, that does sound grueling."

"And I guess it doesn't matter much - no one really sees me, but I'm still a boy... having hair like this isn't really fitting, is it?"

Kaworu hummed, tilting his head. "I don't much mind what length your hair is. I don't see you as any less of a boy. But I understand why you'd dislike it."

"I've tried to look around for something sharp a few times. I really wanna cut it, but I can't find anything to use. You'd think they'd have scissors laying around somewhere..."

Kaworu's hand dropped away as he turned back to the piano. Shinji continued to look at him. "If it means your comfort, I'll try my best to find some for you. I do know my way around a little better than you, after all."

"Ah," Shinji blinked. "Would you really?"

"Of course."

Smiling slightly, Shinji turned forward, putting his hands idly on the keys after brushing the strand Kaworu had stroked back behind his ear. "That's really kind of you, Nagisa-kun... I feel like you're always the one helping me out with stuff..."

Kaworu straightened up, shaking his head a little to displace his bangs, clearing his eyes to see the piano. Shinji couldn't help but notice the action. His hair was wild and fluffy, his bangs quite long. Shinji kind of thought that Kaworu was overdue for a haircut too, but he was definitely better off than him.

It'd seemed that after 14 years of uninterrupted sleep, Shinji's hair had grown completely out of control. Back at Wille, he'd been much too concerned with other things to focus much on the unusual length of it, which nearly reached the base of his back now. And anyway, it made sense to think that the people at Wille didn't care enough to manage his physical being, as upsetting as that thought was. But now, in this desolate, ruined Nerv, Shinji didn't have much to keep him occupied besides the piano and his talks with Kaworu. It was hard not to grow uncomfortable with the new style when he had little else to think about. He was just glad there weren't really mirrors anywhere but in the bathrooms, since he didn't have to look at his reflection often.

He should've known it was silly to obsess over his appearance in the midst of an apocalypse, but he couldn't help it. He'd always been a little self-conscious of how feminine his features were, aware that he looked a lot less boyish than many of his peers. And having his hair like this really didn't help. Even he could barely distinguish his sex when he looked long enough in the mirror. Anyone would think he was a girl.