All of it

Don't leave

Sweat drops rolled off the side of my head. I sat up, panting.

I still remember all those times. The pain. All of it. I glanced at my wrists, then back again at the wall. Slowly, getting off my bed, the feeling of hurt left.

It's in the past.

My eyebrows furrow slightly as I try to clear my mind. I look around.

I'm away from that now...it's all done...

I glance down at my wrists, light scars on them that I covered with a tattoo of a few stars and birds. I nearly forgot they existed...

"Can't sleep?"

The voice made me jump. It was unmistakablely Marc.

"How long have you been there?" I gasp lightly.

"Long enough to hear you scream bloody murder," He casually walks across the room and sits on the edge of my bed, taking my hand, and turning it so that the tattoo faced him.

With a slow and steady motion, he took out a pen, and drew his own star on it.

"Drawing stars are complicated, no judging," He squints his eyes at the crooked drawing.

I laugh lightly.

Marc turns his gaze to meet mine.

"I like it when you laugh. When you smile," he raises my hand and holds it against his chest. I could feel his steady heartbeat, now quickening, "I'm here," he whispers.

I also feel my heartbeat quicken. I wanted to hug him, feel the warmth of his words by pressing my face against his chest.

"How'd it happen, if you don't mind me asking," Marc spoke softly, his tone soothing.

"It's not important..." My voice trails off. It's taking all my efforts not to give in to him and tell him everything, but I just can't.

"Lexi."

My breath hitches in my theoat as he says my name. He seems to notice as he chuckles lightly, squeezing my hand just a tad bit tighter.

"You don't need t-" I swiftly cut Marc's words off.

"I can't," I feel my eye lids pressing against eachother, in attempt to free myself from this. From this odd feeling in my chest, from the sensation crawling up my stomach, from the throbbing of my heart.

Marc nods as if in understanding, "If you ever want to talk, do know I'm here..." He gets up, I can spot the disappointment in his gaze throught the light peering through the window.

Stay...

I want to scream out to him.

Come back, come talk to me, come hold me, come fix me, come draw more stars! My lips part as he makes his way towards the door. I want to scream out his name. I wnat him to hear my silent cries for him. Marc! Come back, don't leave.

I can't.

I can't call out to him. It's as if my voice was snatched away from me. I try to speak, but those words won't form, they won't do anythinf. They're useless. So I try to reach out to him, but my hands are useless too.

This body, which I used to control, is uncontrollable. This tongue, which I used to speak with, is incoherent to my command.

Come back, Marc. I want to say it, I need to say it. I scream for him, I scream for you, I yearn for him, I yearn for you, but I can't say it! It's as if the world is pulling us apart. You're too far, come back. Why are you leaving?

Understand! I need you to understand, don't leave that door! DON'T LEAVE THAT-

Marc closes the door behind him. I sit in my own silence.

My mind empties, my thoughts that once wrapped around him, gone.

I get up. It's time to start the day.

As I dress up in black sweatpants and a green T-Shirt, I stare at the mirror. I can imagine him there.

I need him. He doesn't need me.

I turn away from the vanity, letting my hair fall, not even bothering to put it up. My motivation left as quickly as he had left that door.

Yall, I gotta add some ideas, if anyone has ideas or changes they'd like to make, go ahead and add :)

Word count: 698