Revitalized Heart (Completed)

Part 20

Zayn

I sigh as look over the numerous messages from my mother. I should honestly block her. She is saying how sorry she is and wishes she could see me and talk to me. I don't have anything to say to her honestly.

"Here baby your french toast and eggs are ready," Yasmin said while placing a plate in front of me. I look at her and I can't help but to smile. I watch as she turns back to the counter and grabs a bottle of syrup.

"Syrup baby?," Yasmin offered. I nod my head and she pours the perfect amount over my french toast. She winks before turning back and then handing me a glass of orange juice. I watch as she prepares a plate for herself and my eyes travel over her backside. She has on this little black lingerie piece that stops just below her ass.

"You look good as hell baby," I said. She turns back and sticks out her tongue at me and I chuckle softly. Once she has her plate and drink ready, she sits next to me at the kitchen island. I say a quick prayer over the food and we both start to eat. This is usually how our Saturday mornings go. We get up kind of early, cook breakfast, and spend the day together. I'll see what she wants to do today.

"This is really good baby thank you so much for this," I said.

"Anything for you baby," Yasmin said. She puckers her lips and I lean in and peck her lips. She moaned softly and I narrow my eyes at her.

"You definitely hopping on this dick after we eat," I stated.

"Anything you say daddy," Yasmin said while smirking. I kiss her cheek and then I sigh as I hear my phone vibrate again. I look and I see another text from my mom. Why is she blowing up my phone? I scoff before setting my phone back down.

"You ok baby?," Yasmin asked.

"It's just my mom blowing up my phone still," I responded.

"Oh....well it's been over a month. You don't...you don't want to reach out?," Yasmin asked cautiously.

"....I just can't understand why she had to get high to come meet you."

"Baby...you may never understand the why but she is very sorry I know she is."

"Maybe but...I don't....I don't have that connection with her Yasmin to where I feel it's even worth the effort to talk this out," I said honestly.

"Baby....do you mean that?," Yasmin asked.

"Yeah....I know I will always love her in the sense since she gave birth to me. But that's it...I don't know. We've been trying to mend this relationship for years and it's just not....it's not how I want it to be. She's just inconsistent with her sobriety."

"Zayn baby.....addiction is really hard to understand unless you have been through it yourself. But you have to give her credit for trying. She wants a relationship with you and I think she is willing put in the work to do so. So how can you not be willing?" I just sigh as I shake my head.

"....I have a lot of resentment towards her Yasmin. Why didn't she stay sober to raise me? I wasn't good enough?," I questioned.

"Baby no absolutely not. I am sure she beats herself up every single day for not witnessing you grow into the man you are today. You turned out amazing and you know that. She probably hates she wasn't really a part of that." I sigh as I run a hand down my face. Yasmin gently rubs the back of my neck and I sigh a bit; she knows that calms me down.

"...I know I can't really fully understand her point of view of things and maybe that's the part that's really fucking with me," I said.

"I understand. You don't have to fully understand, just how to process it and how to move forward. Can you really say you don't want a relationship with your mom?," Yasmin said.