𝓛𝓸𝓼𝓮𝓻 [Ashtray x y/n]

S3 E3

TW: Y/n's mom literally kills herself.

She fucking died. How the fuck did I not know my mother killed herself. I'm in Ash's room and he's trying everything to comfort me. He bought me my favorite flowers, gave me like a billion sweaters and shirts, and is currently cuddling me. But I still can't process that my mom killed herself.

I know she was a shitty person and a terrible mother, but she used to never be like that. She only became that way cause her ex boyfriend fucked everything up. Like on her birthday.

My mom smiled as 8 year old me brought her a cake that said "happy birthday". I had Londons mom make the cake and I writ the happy birthday. But then her boyfriend had to open his cigarette smelling mouth.

"That looks like shit." He laughed. God I hated his voice. Every time he spoke it smelt like a burning building.

"Well I think it's very thoughtful? You didn't get me anything?" My mom said to him:

"What'd you just say to me? So you're saying all I do isn't enough?!" He gasped and sat up.

My mom pushed me out her room but I heard them arguing. It soon escalated to her boyfriend leaving the house for a whole week and then randomly showing back up like nothing happened.

And then Christmas. That was the last time I saw him.

Him and my mom got in an argument as usual, they did every night. I brushed it off and waited for those two toddlers to be done so I could open my presents and stocking.

But when my mom walked into the living room, he walked out the door, slamming it and causing the door to break. Like it was stuck being shit for like 1 year, we had to leave through the back door after that.

(The Christmas incident happened to me irl yall😛)

That's when things started getting bad. She started picking up on drinking, and became violent. She would constantly yell at me that I'm a piece of shit and she doesn't love me, but I would always shrug it off as "drunk words"

Anyways.

Ash was making sure I was okay for like.... The entire week after I found out. I was okay after like the 2nd day but I liked the princess treatment?

We are currently at his house listening to Frank Ocean cause I had told him Frank is my favorite artist. 😈😈😈

"What's this one? It's really good." He asked.

"This is... Super rich kids." I nodded.
"And yeah, it is really good. All of his songs are." I laughed.

Ash laughed too. Then I realized I never got the emerald necklace back from Maddys house...

"Hey uhm... I gotta go to Maddys house real quick, I'll be back though I swear!" I said and got off the bed.

"W- okay...? Why?" Ash asked and paused the song.

"I just have to...get something from her house." I said and started leaving.

"It's the necklace." Ash said.

"Wh- yeah...I took it off I'm sorry..." I sighed.

"I know. It's okay, we were mad at each other then, I understand it." Ash nodded.

I smiled and left.

Around 30 minutes later I came back with the necklace on. I unpaused the song as I got back on the bed. Ash smiled and pulled me closer.

We sat in silence, listening to music and enjoying the company.

"I love you Y/n.." Ash said.

"What?" I asked, I didn't get to process his words from how sudden he said it.

"I said I love you." He said again.

"Oh...I love you too..." I said.

"...we haven't said that to each other in like...forever.." Ash sighed.

I nodded. "Yeah.. but things have been complicated recently.." I shrugged.

"Still, I should have been saying I love you everyday." Ash sighed.

"It's okay." I assured him.

He looked at me and smiled. "I will always love you."