You return like autumn and I fall all the time

Chapter 31

"Are we going to kiss now?"
These six words had left my mouth before I could slap my palm against my lips to shut my goddam mouth. I have no idea where this came from.

"No" Dakshith replied with a strange calmness which was the opposite of what his body said,
His grip grew tighter around my waist and his eyes narrowed.

"Why?" I asked, gripping my fingers even tighter around his nape brushing his hair slightly.

Something in his eyes seemed to be pleading, "Because" he took a deep breath "because a kiss won't do" he took another deep breath "because i will crave for another and you won't.. because a kiss wouldn't be enough for me, I need your lips against mine every second"

Whatever was passing between Dakshith and me churned low in my stomach, with so much urgency. So much that it made me dizzy and flustered and about to crawl out of my skin.
With the growing intensity I could feel the warmth radiating off Dakshith's large body in waves that seemed to sync perfectly with my heartbeat.

"Relax" a deep voice jerked me back to the moment, His fingers delicately played with the fabric of my skirt, "what are you thinking about?"

Before saying what i said, the day I had spent with Dakshith today flashed against my eyes,
His precious delicate touches, his voice against my ears, the way he broke my bedroom door, the way he held me in the diner earlier, i might regret making out with a guy in the middle of a dark street while I'm running very late to get home, but i think I'll regret not kissing him even more because,
I think I like him,
I really do,
"I'm thinking that you should kiss me" i finally said.

His eyes that narrowed earlier grew bigger than ever, the hazel in his eyes turned to almost golden, or maybe it was the street lamp, "are you sure? Are you really sure Sanjh? Because if you say no now I might lose my goddam mind"

"Yes i am s-"

I didn't finish the sentence, i didn't think i possibly could
as Dakshith's lips were on mine.
He kissed me as if he was starving for an eternity, so gentle yet intense,
His lips desperately sought anything that I could give him, our lips opened, thrashing against each other's mouth, my heart drummed against the walls of my own chest.
His hand roamed over the fabric of my skirt, travelling down my thighs, while my hands toured up his wide chest, reaching the nape of his neck, his fingers tangled in my hair, pulling at them softly. Dakshith grazed my lips with his once again devouring me, making me melt in his hold.

Dakshith's lips left mine, revealing he was breathing as violently as i was.
He slowly dropped me on my feet to the floor, brushing over a few strands of my hair that he messed with his fingers, "I was right" he said still struggling to catch his breath.

"About what?" I asked

"It wouldn't be enough" he continued "A kiss wouldn't be enough"

His words made me nervous and chuckle a little,

"That Goddam sound of your laugh, it's gorgeous"
"You're so fucking gorgeous Sanjh"

My heart started to beat faster than it ever could,
is this real?
Is it actually happening?
The guy who would always nag me,
Flicker his tongue in front of me whenever he'd get a grade higher than me,
Would Pull my ponytail and run away,
Is standing here in front of me in a god knows what street, calling me "fucking gorgeous" right after making out with me?

Should I,
Should I confess too?
Is it time?
Is it okay?
I still have so many things to ask,
So many apologies to receive from this man but all the anger and something similar to resentment I've ever had for this guy just faded away, seeming as if it never existed.

"Dakshith, I think we have so much to talk about fi-"
I couldn't complete my sentence again,
Not because he kissed me,
This time it was a noise,
Of his mobile phone, he got a call,
From Mishika,
and before i could tell him not to pick it up he already had done that,

"What happened?" He said to her on the phone and I wish I could hear what she had to say but i realised it's been three minutes and he's talking to her, "I'll be there soon don't worry M" he said to her, something close to worry reached his face,

And i knew where i stand now,
Him receiving her call while we were having such an intimate moment showed me my place. He calls me Sanjh, but he has a nickname for her, bloody D talking to his bloody M.

Probably he was still on the call but his voice started to fade away in the background as I started to walk forward, away From Dakshith.
A tear sloped down on my left cheek which I wiped instantly.
This is how it has always been haven't it?
I was such a big fool to believe that he had feelings for me, that he would choose me over  Mishika.

I wiped a few more tears before i finally got into the taxi, i didn't care to look at him, because I knew i would find him still talking to her on the phone.
And i left for home.