Deep Dark Blues

Chapter 10- Jonas

The night after was brutal, Reed had been tossing and turning for hours, feeling Aksel's hands slide down her body while his dark eyes flashed before her eyes. After the events of yesterday, Reed was forced to take yet another pill, sobbing quietly in her bed until the chemicals started lulling her to sleep.

When she woke up from her dreamless slumber, the edges of her vision were fuzzy and her chin was sticky with saliva. She reached for her phone, groggily searching with her fingers until they bumped into the device. The clock showed noon, way past the start of Reed's shift. If it wasn't for the pill Reed would have most likely jumped out of bed, but with the chemicals still very much present in her bloodstream, she slowly but surely rolled out of the sheets.

The morning was slow, Reed opted to skip breakfast fighting the nauseating feeling while she changed, only to march straight to the lab. Her bones ached with exhaustion, her head aching, but she felt... good? It wasn't a euphoric state one would get after recreational drugs, but rather the deep sense of peace, feeling like nothing could sway the inner serenity she was feeling. The world felt fuzzy and quiet, just like she liked it. If she were to describe the feeling, Reed would compare it to laying at the bottom of a pool, looking up towards the surface as the small bubbles of air escape your lips. That sort of peaceful moment when one has enough air in their lungs to just fall onto the seabed without the worry of drowning.

She traversed the corridors, her steady step leading her to the lab without running into anybody on the way. Upon entering the Lab, Reed was pleasantly surprised to find her station set with a tray of food beside it while Ryan sat at his usual spot, digging into the seabed samples. He raised his head, gracing her with a small smile.

"Thought you were going to sleep through the expedition."

"We got a permit?"

"Yeah... We kind of had a meeting this morning regarding the plan for the day. I promised to fill you in since you had a rough night..." His eyes searched hers for any sign of distress but did not find anything.

"Are... Are you doing alright?"

Reed blinked at him, something small and insignificant wriggling deep in her subconscious. She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to think about it... And the pills made it easier just to ignore him.

"What are we doing?"

Ryan hesitated for a moment.

"So... First we will do the expedition to the Shadow once again, this time around with the smaller, more resistant UUV. Then, after the material and samples are gathered we will work and then we will vote, after working hours. We should be able to vote through our schedule planners... You know where that is, right?"

"Yes Ryan, I do know where the schedule planners are..."

"Okay... Any questions?" He released an awkward chuckle. Reed appreciated him trying his hardest to be supportive, despite his reclusive nature but the shift in his mood was bothering her. She liked the quiet, sweet Ryan who supported her with quiet, yet confident words instead of this... But, she wasn't about to be ungrateful... She just wanted him to act normal, whatever that meant...

The two sat in an uncomfortable silence, Reed feeling Ryan's eyes on her while she scarfed down her lunch. It was clear Ryan wanted to talk, to ask but was holding himself back. Eventually, his silent stare became too much to handle for her.

"I am fine Ryan... I just had to sleep on it..."

"Did you..." His question held so much weight, it could literally crush her. She only nodded, confirming his suspicions.

"Just... be careful..." He muttered, the mask of indifference back on. Reed felt a twinge of guilt at the sight, wishing she had been a bit more gentle with him. Ryan meant well, trying to offer reassurance and show concern, but Reed couldn't help but get defensive. In truth, Aksel didn't even touch her... at least not in a way that could clearly indicate rape... and yet, Ryan was acting as if Reed has gotten seriously hurt. She was scared, yes, but she didn't get... hurt. With the pills in her system, the situation felt so stupid... so pointless. She just wanted everything to go back to normal. She didn't want any special care or attention, she just wanted everybody to act as if nothing happened...