Own Time

Chapter 17

"The Phoenix," I said, glancing at my mother with uncertainty. Had I guessed correctly? The emblem was ubiquitous throughout the mansion, adorning the clothing of the staff and, notably, every garment my mother owned. It was only now that I realized the same symbol graced the back of all my own clothes as well.

Even before my journey through time, I had encountered the symbol on occasion, but its significance eluded me. Upon arriving at the mansion, my curiosity grew, compelling me to seek answers in the library. Despite my limited education, which made deciphering the texts challenging, I managed to grasp the name of the symbol—it was written in terms simple enough for someone like me to understand.

"That's correct. Do you know what that means for us?" Mother asked. I shook my head, waiting for her to continue.

"A Phoenix is a firebird that turns itself into ashes once it reaches a certain age, only to resurrect from those ashes as it was before. In this way, the Phoenix symbolizes renewal or rebirth..."

Hearing this, my eyes widened. Could my ability to travel through time be not just an answer to my wish but something inherent in my bloodline?

"Is it possible for such a thing to happen in real life?" I asked, my curiosity piqued yet cautious of revealing too much. After all, I was just a child eager for answers.

"I don't think so. I believe it's only used as a metaphor. There is no record in our family of anyone actually traveling through time," she replied thoughtfully. I nodded, silently thinking, 'Well, there is now.'

"I see. So, you're saying that if it's really a metaphor, our family has always been mentally strong in the face of disasters because they never fear death and always believe they can overcome anything," I said. At that, all the attendants, including Mother, stared at me in shock.

"What?" I asked.

"Are you sure you're only five years old? Or are you over twenty but didn't grow up because of how hard your life was before I found you?" Mother said bluntly. There she went again, mixing her compliments with insults.

"I'm five years old, that's it. You don't need to be an adult to understand things," I replied, slightly irritated.

"I mean, you're a Krieger; that makes sense," she said confidently. I shook my head, relieved to have gotten through that one.

"So, that means I understood it correctly," I said, and she nodded slightly as she patted my head.

"Yes. Your understanding is connected to your past memories, which triggered and awakened your hidden mahika," she explained. Her words made me ponder deeply. If that is indeed the reason, I must admit that it is not death that I fear the most. What terrifies me more is the possibility of not being able to do what I want before I die.

"But of course, your past doesn't matter anymore. What matters is who you choose to be today and tomorrow," she said, looking at me with a gentle and comforting expression. Her words seemed to astonish everyone in the dining room. I smiled at her and nodded.

"Continuing our discussion, you should also take note of this: there are three levels of our fire mahika," she said, prompting me to sit up straight.

"Levels?" I asked, not fully understanding what she meant.

"It means the measurement of our mahika. You can gauge our fire mahika by observing its color," she explained.

"So, there are different colors of fire? Like your blue one last night?" I asked, my expression full of surprise.

"Exactly, and that color indicates how powerful the user is. There are three known colors of fire: crimson, orange, and lastly, sapphire blue."

"Crimson is what I have. Is that the weakest one?" I asked, feeling a bit downhearted.

"Cheer up, kid. The crimson color is for those who have just awakened their mahika and haven't been trained in its use. Once you are trained, it will gradually turn to orange, which is the most common in our bloodline," she said, making me feel relieved. I had been worried I wouldn't be much help to Mother.

"Then I will train hard to turn mine to orange. But, Mother, isn't yours sapphire blue? That means you have the most powerful one," I said, leaning forward with interest.

"Yes, because I am that powerful—no questions asked. But I know what you're thinking—you want your mahika to be like mine. There's no need for you to rush. Just focus on being a child and learning to control your mahika at the same time. There's plenty of time for you to improve your abilities, but for now, just enjoy being a child. I'm telling you, adulthood is not fun," she explained with a sigh of annoyance. Despite me not being a child anymore, it wouldn't hurt to listen to her.

"I understand, Mother. I'll try, even though I'm uncomfortable with it," I said, smiling widely. She smirked and nodded.

"Good. How about this: once you're fully trained, I'll teach you myself how to make your fire mahika as powerful as mine. Let me warn you, though—it will take a lot of your strength, energy, and, worst of all, your sanity. So it's much better if we start when you reach adulthood," she said with a confident smile. My own smile began to fade as she mentioned teaching me only once I was an adult. Knowing the events of the future, my heart started to feel heavy, as if something was pulling it downward.

"Hey, what's wrong? Are you hurt?" she asked, and all the attendants were instantly on alert. Crade and Griza rushed towards me.

"Young master, are you alright?" Griza asked, worried.

"Do I need to call the physician?" Crade asked, panicking.

"I'm alright. I think I'm just too full," I said, trying to reassure them with a smile.

"Are you sure?" Mother asked, squinting her eyes in suspicion.

"Yes, Mother," I replied. She exhaled and stood up.

"If that's the case, we'll end our conversation here so you can rest. You're not allowed to move much until you feel better. Understood?" she asked.

"Yes, Mother. It was nice talking with you, and I hope we can continue our conversation," I said as I got out of the chair and bowed to her.

"Don't do that—it creeps me out. Just be yourself, and yes, we'll continue it another time," she said, putting on her coat as Vel prepared to leave.

"Alright, have a nice day, Mother," I said with a smile.

"You too. I'll be going now," she replied as she left the room, leaving me with the attendants.

"Shall we go to your room and rest, young master?" Crade asked as he carried me in his arms.

"How about the library? I think I can rest there," I suggested. Crade looked at Griza for confirmation.

"Alright, you can rest there, young master," Griza permitted, and I smiled at her. Crade began walking, leaving Griza and the other attendants in the dining room.

I need a quiet place where I can get ahead in my knowledge about my mahika. I'll read a thousand books I don't fully understand until I can actually learn from them. It sounded like Mother wants to delay my advancement to let me enjoy my childhood. But knowing the future, there's no way I'll just wait for events to unfold. I must ensure I am strong enough before I reach adulthood...

No, even before I reach sixteen.