Own Time

Chapter 33

I find myself in the grand ballroom of the mansion, accompanied by Crade and Griza. Mother, having some pressing work, departed after we had our lunch. As I wander through the room, I observe the attendants diligently adorning the space with decorations for my birthday celebration tomorrow. For nearly a month, I have been preparing for this event, feeling a thrill of excitement as I anticipate celebrating my birthday for the first time with my true family. Yet, beyond the festivity, it is the purpose of this grand celebration that I am most eager for, and I must ensure that everything goes according to plan.

"What do you think, young master?" Crade inquires as we stroll through the room.

"It's better than I expected," I reply, admiring the decorations already in place. I have heard that this ballroom has not been used for decades, as Mother prefers not to celebrate events on a grand scale. Thus, when we announced that the ballroom would be used again, everyone was enthusiastic about preparing it.

The decorations are subtle, lacking the shiny and sparkly exuberance seen at Floris' birthday. We avoided using bright colors, aiming to maintain the dignity and image of our family. Instead, we chose dark hues with a few golden chandeliers for contrast, complemented by Phoenix symbols adorning the cloths and curtains.

"I am very much thrilled about this, young master. For a child like you, this is way more than we hoped for," Griza said as I stopped and turned around to look at her. "I am anticipating what else you have in store, not just for us, but for all those who have misunderstood us."

"I just want to change their point of view, especially towards Mother. I want to lessen her burdens. I recently discovered that she's still so young yet bears so many responsibilities, carrying almost everything on her shoulders. I long for a future where everyone, including my mother and myself, is happy," I said, fragments of my past floating in my mind.

The first time I saw Mother, she was riding a horse, the Black Knights trailing behind her, making their way to the palace to celebrate their victory after the five-year war against the traitors who sought power at the cost of both lands. Her face then was a stark contrast to the one I see now. Back then, she appeared emotionless, not just with her usual poker face, but utterly lifeless.

I also saw the fragments of the events where both Scanolos and Narouca fell and became lands of defeat. Now that I have been given a second chance, I will not let the future repeat itself. I know the true reasons behind those tragic events, and neither my body nor my age will stop me from achieving my goal.

Both Griza and Crade smiled at me, their expressions radiating pride. We continued to stroll around the ballroom, offering guidance and instructions to the attendants as they worked.

......................

It's nighttime, and I am getting ready for bed. Crade hands me a glass of warm milk before I lie down. I drink it slowly, savoring every drop, and hand the empty glass back to him. Climbing into bed on my own, I accept his help as he tucks me in with my blanket. He sets the glass aside and begins telling stories to help me fall asleep, but despite his efforts, I remain wide awake. Not wanting to worry him, I pretend to be asleep by shutting my eyes, knowing that if he realizes I'm having trouble resting, he will inform Griza and Mother.

I feel Crade quietly leave the room, and I hear the door softly close behind him. Opening my eyes, I slowly look around, then take a deep breath. Staring at the ceiling, I try to think of ways to fall asleep, but my mind keeps drifting to the events of tomorrow. Although I'm excited, my fear and nervousness overshadow everything. I imagine my plan failing, making everything much worse.