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I was laying on me and Jordan's bed whilst she put the boys to bed.
Although they wanted to sleep with us, Jordan said they should spend the night in their bed.
Reason?
I ain't got a clue but when she came back I looked at her.
"You okay?" I asked sitting up and she smiled.
"I'm fine pa. You wanna cuddle?" She asked and I nodded laying back down and she climbed between my legs, putting a leg between mine and the other over and her hands under my back whilst I played with her hair.
"I missed you." I mumbled smelling her hair and she smiled.
"I know, I missed you too but do you really gotta smell my hair?" She asked chuckling and I nodded.
"Yh cs I missed the cocoa butter smell." I replied and she looked up at me before sitting up and she sat me up too.
"Wuchu doin?" I asked and she began pulling off my shirt but I stopped her.
"Ma no."
"Please. I missed your warm skin." She mumbled and I let her take it off and when she threw my shirt across our room she looked back at me, at my chest before her face dropped seeing the scar on my body.
"W-where did this come from?" She asked and I scratched my head.
"I don't know."
"Don't lie to me. Where did this come from?" She asked again and I sighed.
I didn't tell her.
I told her I attempted to take my life not that I actually nearly did.
"Don't lie to me." She added, her voice breaking and I felt the tears stinging my eyes.
"I- I shot myself." I mumbled and she moved from me completely.
"You did what?"
"I was in pain ma-"
"You tried to leave our kids and almost succeeded? Yes you said you tried to take your life but you never once mentioned did you shoot yourself." She replied with tears leaving her eyes.
"I know your upset-"
"What if you actually did die Ethan. What if I came back and you wasn't here."
