Desolate // WLW Highschool Story

5. Smoke- Sexual Scenes

TW: Smoking, Mention of Self-Harm, Sexual Scenes, Minor Sexual Assault, and Mention of Suicide

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2:32 AM

I stare...

stare at the stars, they felt like they were flickering. Much wasn't out, the sky felt empty. I hear the creak of the rusty swing, letting my exhaustion catch up to me. My eyes start to flicker, I decide to stare down at my phone, and I see the line blink where my message is supposed to be.

"Hey"

reads from Tori, 30 hours ago.

I see smoke fill the air, "don't fall asleep on me." She coughs lowering her cigar and giggling. I smirk, looking faded. I look to the bong below me, "I don't usually smoke indica give me a break." I utter, reaching for the bong again. "But one more hit won't hurt," I pick up the lighter and light it near the bowl, as it burns I see Amelia smile at me. I get distracted and burn too much before I remove the bowl, inhaling the smoke. "Fuck," I cough out as the smoke exits my lungs, and my eyes start to water.

Silence fills the air, I see Amelia still staring concerned. I don't know if my eyes started to water because of the weed, or because I was crying again. But it hurts.

"Seriously bro, why'd you call me out here? You don't smoke unless you're going through it." She softly whispers on the swing beside me. I slowly turn my head towards her, while I put the bong and lighter down. I admire her short, shiny black hair in a half-up ponytail, leaving her front pieces out. She licks her straight teeth, as I glimpse at her almost vampire-like fangs. She's wearing black, which contrasts with her pale skin. I stare back at her soft blue eyes, which were surrounded by smudged eyeliner. I can still feel the tears run down my face, I wipe them wondering how to phrase my next words.

She hits her cigar again, and turns to exhale the smoke, "You can talk to me about anything, I mean it. I don't want you to go through the same shit again." She throws the cigar to the ground and crushes it with her boots. I still stare at her, still wiping my eyes as I try to figure out what to say. "You didn't... you didn't relapse again did you?" She slowly says now staring back, full attention on me. She starts to spiral- "Which is totally okay if you did, just tell me next time. A road to recovery isn't-"

"No!" I shake my head, "I mean... no." I say softer. Her blue eyes slowly blink, "oh, then what?" She takes a deep breath.

Amelia is the only queer friend I have, I'm not sure what her sexual orientation is exactly but I think she just hooks up with whoever she thinks is hot. I remember when we first met in 7th grade, she causally brought up her, at the time, girlfriend. I was shocked she had admitted to being gay so openly in front of a group of people. I remember looking around for disgusted faces or insults, but no one cared. She had been bullied for it a few times, but she always stood up for herself and didn't care what people thought.

"How did you um..." I softly whispered, almost embarrassed. "Yeah?" She didn't move, almost like she thought if she moved I would stop talking. I lower my eyes, to the ground. "How did you know you were like... into girls?" I say the last part quietly, almost wishing I could take it back.

Amelia is the only friend I can talk about deep shit with, she knew how bad I got 2 years ago. She was the only one who knew all the details, especially about the self-harm. She would stay with me for days as I skipped school because I couldn't mentally do it. We would spend many nights together talking about our feelings. She's the one who introduced me to smoking, which probably wasn't the best for a depressed girl, but at the time it helped me get away from my feelings. Without her, I probably wouldn't be alive today.

"Oh," she leans back, expecting something more deep. She slightly laughs, "I just knew man, girls were always hot." She notices I'm still staring at the ground, with a sad expression. "Um I mean," she panics trying to give me a helpful answer. "You could experiment? I mean if you think you might be into girls, is that what you're implying?" I gulp, "I guess." I whisper.

I finally lift my eyes to see her genuine expression and smile. I laugh and shake my head, trying to cheer up. "Who would be willing to experiment with me?" I ask half-jokingly.

"I have plenty of exes who are insane, it would be a perfect match!" She chuckles at her own joke. "Shut up," I laugh and roll my eyes, now kicking slightly on the swing.

"Come on," She grabs my arm dragging me off the swing, bringing me under the playground slide. I hear her giggles, and can barely see due to the broken street lamp. We sit down, and she grabs my hands in front of me. Laying them on top of our knees,

"So tell me, what's with this new interest." I can only see her beautiful eyes in front of me, staring perfectly at me. We fall into a comfortable silence, as she starts to rub my hand with her thumb. "Um..." I start, looking at our hands.

She shifts closer.

Knees touching.

"Like you said..." I continue, whispering.

She brings her face closer to mine. And parts her dark cherry lips seductively.

"Girls are hot." I smile.

I feel so fucking turned on. She licks her lips.

She leans over me, placing her mouth to my ear. "I know."

I hear each syllable electrocute through my brain. Her hot breath sends a shiver down my spine. The thrill makes me feel hot like I'm burning inside. I shift in my seat anxious- anticipation.

"I would experiment with you." She sexually whispers again.

Her mouth makes it down to my neck. I'm pushed against the playground, still crisscrossed.

She placed her left hand on my bare thigh, her right on my chest. Mine stay to the ground.

She starts to rub my thigh slowly making its way up, stopping on my high inner thigh.
Still bare.
Skin against skin.

Finally, I feel her lips press against my neck, she softly starts to move them. I can hear the noises under me, as she starts to go harder.

Soft kisses turn intense quickly, as her whole body grinds on top of me. I retaliate by grinding on her hand near my thigh. Hitting all the parts I need it to.

I lose focus as the drugs hit me. I feel her kisses all over my neck, but I can't tell exactly where.

I lose sight, and everything becomes blurry. Everything disappears and my thoughts are empty, I feel at peace. I start to giggle, putting my hands around her. It all feels like heaven. Our body's flow and melt together.

I don't know how much time passes, but she continues to work on my neck.
Biting
Licking
Sucking
Kissing.

Soft moans unawarely escape my mouth. I feel them vibrate my throat. I have never felt pleasure like this.

I start to come back to my senses, imagining Tori in my mind. I imagine her as the one under me, sucking on my skin and kissing me passionately. I grind harder at the thought of Tori, as the hand I grind begins to help. I feel passionate circular motions below.

It creates heavenly friction against my clit.

Another louder moan escapes me, squinting my eyes in pleasure. I open them expecting Tori,

But instead I see Amelia look up, her face is now across from my mine. My smile drops, as I realize what's happening. "This okay?" Amelia smirks, clearly into it. She moves her hands to now lay slightly below my hipbone under my pants.

I freeze not knowing what to do. It's quiet except for her panting in front of me, as she lays inches from my face. I see her slowly lean in to kiss me.

I take a deep breath and my look around in panic.

"Get off!" I yell trying to push her back. But her hands push my hips down, making me unable to move.