BY THE RIVER ᯓ★ [REWRITING]

The itoshi's

"Tell your baby, that I'm your baby."
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Now playing... I BET ON LOSING DOGS

(YOUR POV)
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"I'm home, mother..father.."

She said as opened the door to her house expecting her parents to lash out at her. only to be greeted by her elder brother, Itoshi Sae.

"Sae.."
She said quietly as she was surprised to see him. she wasn't informed about his arrival beforehand causing her to feel a bit anxious from being in the presence of her older brother. With him only huffing in response to her saying his name as he stood aside to let her in the house.
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                                   (Flash back)
I remember watching my siblings play together that day. The day my mother said she wanted me to Disappear...she had said it as if was natural.. like I meant nothing to her.

"Mom! look at the drawing I made of us! Look here's Sae and rin playing soccer, and here's you me and dad watching them play together at the park! Do you like it mom? Do you? Do you?!

A young Y/N said while holding up the painting she had just made, with her small face and hands being dirtied with paint. At the time her smile was so bright one would think she was the personification of the sun with how bright and gentle her smile was.

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RIP!
.......

Her eyes widened in horror as she watched her mother snatch her work and begin ripping it up. each shred being even more unrepairable than the last.

"Wait!- mom what are you doing to my painting!?"

The younger girl said as tried her best to grab her artwork only doing to rip it even more.

"Don't waste your time on such useless things like art, Y/N you wouldn't wanna be an even more useless child than you already are, disappointment."

Her mother scoffed while turning away. the young girl knelt down holding what was once a painting, now shreds in her hands. as tears began falling from her face landing on the pile of shredded paper in her small hands.

"What..? No- no Mom this was supposed to be a gift for you! I thought that maybe you'd like this since Rin did a similar painting and you- you hung it on the wall! I thought that maybe you'd like one from me as well!"
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I remember making a painting for my mother that day, because I saw my brother rin make one, and she had hung it on the wall next to all the pictures of my brothers and their accomplishments. So I had made one in hopes of possibly making her proud, I wanted her to acknowledge me, be proud of me for once as well.. but that only turned out to be unsuccessful as she had ripped it to shreds. In front of me..
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"Don't be stupid Y/N no one would ever want this stupid piece of paper, make yourself useful and disappear if you really wanted to give me a gift."

                          (End of flash back)
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By the time I got home my 'family' had already began eating dinner, it was.. different. It had been years since we had eaten together as a family due to everyone having different schedules so naturally having everyone at the dinner table gave me a sense of nostalgia.. it made me happy..

"Y/N have you been keeping up with your studies. Do you have the top grades?"

My older brother Sae asked, causing me to choke on my food due to the suddenness from his question. my parents on the other hand  immediately looked in my direction. Expecting a decent response in regard to his question while my other brother, Rin excused himself from the table. I knew he and our older brother didn't get along as well as they used to so I hoped he would at least stay.. but he didn't.

"yeah! actually I've been keeping up, I'm currently in the 2nd highest rank for grades.. meaning I'm close to the top!-"
I told my brother as he suddenly cut me off.

"Being in 2nd place means nothing unless you're at the top. Meaning you're a failure. Here I thought you, Would prove yourself to not be a disappointment for once but it seems you're still the same incompetent useless little kid you were before. You're no sister of mine if you can't even manage secure the top spot in school."

..
Crack.
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Crack
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CRACK!

At the time I felt my heart shatter at his statement. I felt anger but not at him, I felt anger towards myself. What  he said wasn't exactly wrong. But it wasn't right as well.
I wanted to be better. I wanted my parents to acknowledge me, be proud of me, hug me anything. I wanted and I wanted and wanted. but I knew that wouldn't be the case for me. Because after that I excused myself from dinner. And Locked myself in my room afterwords, like the coward I was.

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"I think I might go insane.. UGHHH IM SO DUMB WHY DID I AGREE TO MEET WITH HER!!"

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HI GUYS NEW CHAPTER ITS BEEN A WHILE!! SORRY THIS CHAPTERS SHORT!! IM NOT SURE IF ILL FINISH THIS BOOK BECAUSE WHEN I FIRST WROTE IT I ORIGINALLY DIDENT HAVE A PLOT SO I THINK ITS A BIT CONFUSING TO YOU GUYS HOW THE CHAPTERS CONNECT BUT I REALLY LIKE IT! ILL BE SURE TO MAKE ANOTHER STORY WHERE THE PLOT ISNT AS CONFUSING AS THIS ONE BUT WE'LL SEE IF I STILL CONTINUE THIS  😋