Daydream

V

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

"What ?", i said with my voice cracking a bit looked confused but really worried for Jaemin and indeed lost.

"Did he said that he can't go ???" I didn't answer.

"Aera, why did you let him go ? Are you crazy ? If he tells you he can't, so why did you make him do it ??" He said again trying to stay calm.

"I- I'm sorry ! I didn't know", my lips trembling suddenly, holding myself from crying right now. I was afraid of Renjun being angry at me, I didn't like it when people yell at me or argue with me, that would make me cry right away. And right now that was the sweet Renjun, for sure I did something serious.

"But he said he can't !! You knew ! So why did you do it ???" He shouts in panic. The noise coming from Jaemin is getting faster.

"Please Renjun that's not the moment !" Jeno shouts a bit to bring him back to his senses what's happening in front of him is far more serious.

I look at them in panic while Jaemin is sitting breathing hard and moaning in pain, I can't see what's happening because I'm in panic myself. They talking to him but a little further away to let him breath correctly, while Mark is calling someone, I guess the ambulance.

I stare at them while I'm beginning to cry, feeling too guilty about Jaemin. What's going on ?? That was my kick that did that to him ?? That was my fault. All my fault. I start crying a bit too much, while panicking a lot about what's going on and the situation that we were on.
I try to get up feeling far too guilty for what's happening, and the tears won't stop flowing down my cheeks. I wouldn't want anyone to see me crying and tell me I had no right to cry because it's Jaemin in a critical situation not me. Even if it's true.

I don't feel comfortable, I feel like they're going to argue with me or shout at me, and I already feel guilty for having caused all this.

They were true, I can't be near Jaemin and I should be far away from everyone. I'm scared. They'll all be mad at me.

The ambulance run straight to the trampoline park. I start crying more, what if he dies ? I start crying more and more. I back off a bit to let the ambulance come closer to Jaemin, and trying to calm my panic attack.

I can't stop crying, imagining every possible scenarios and hearing nothing around me.

It was only after twenty minutes that I managed to calm down.
The ambulance is gone, everyone is gone. I'm calm enough to leave and don't have to face anyone, so I slowly make my way outside the trampoline park, everyone 's gone. But where ? Where do I go ? I was far away from my home, alone. I'd forgotten, maybe i should call a taxi ? I don't know i don't have enough money on me and i'm a women, we don't know what can happen. I start crying again, finding myself alone in the night, far from home, not knowing what to do. I look at everywhere while walking with tears streaming down my face. 

"Where am I ?" I whisper to myself.

I've been walking for hours, or it seems. I was non-stop crying. I stopped at a bench too tired from walking. I take out my phone and look at the hour and my percentage. 1 a.m and 10%. Great. But all I was thinking was Jaemin. Was he okay ?

I put my phone in pocket and look everywhere, being a little afraid of running into some stranger or even just finding help. Suddenly my phone lights up, receiving a call from Chenle. I hesitate a little, afraid of being scolded. But I finally pick up as it's the only way I'll know if Jaemin is alright and find a way to get back home.