Coffee People - Pedro Pascal by Emma Star

Chapter one, Homebody

playlist for this chapter:

- womanizer (britney spears)

- Disturbia (Rihanna)

- Moth to a flame (Swedish House Mafia and the Weeknd)

- S&M (Rihanna)

- Motive (Ariana Grande and Doja Cat)

- HEAVEN AND BACK (Chase Atlantic)

This was my therapists idea. She says I don't go out there enough, that I hide away in my apartment with Lydia and Jessie too much. I suppose she's right. I let her, and my roommates convince me to go out tonight and I regretted it before I even set foot outside.

Now I'm walking across the street in heels I haven't worn since my senior prom almost 3 years ago. Holding hands with my biggest fans, who I am platonically in love with, my best friends in the entire world. On my left is Jessie, who's using her free hand to fix her short black bob. And holding my other hand is Lydia, who is currently talking my ear off about all the fun we're going to have tonight.

'I can't believe your therapist has more sway on you than I do.' She says.

'That's cause my therapist actually used reason trying to convince me to go out,' I say, 'All you ever talk about is all the hot men and women we're going to meet at the bar.'

'It's true Mil! You should have seen the girl I was dancing with last week!' She laughs.

Lydia was the social butterfly of the three girls. She was always out doing something. She was naturally charming, something I struggled with.

'It's at the end of this street' Lydia informs us.

Jessie is nervous too, I can tell because she can't leave her hair alone. That's her only tell, she has a mean poker face and she uses it all the time. It's her way of surviving. Her eyes find mine and I smile encouragingly at her.

She huffs out a laugh, 'we'll be fine.'

'Yeah, if we don't like it we'll just get McDonalds.' I say.

'Eating McDonalds when you're drunk is literally the best.' Lydia says.

I laugh, thinking of the last time we got McDonalds when we were drunk.

'Do you have your earplugs?' Jessie asks me.

I let go of her hand and reach into my shoulder bag to show her my earplugs. Besides the fact that protecting your ears is good, my earplugs also help me not get overwhelmed as fast. Jessie shows hers in return. She always says she's going to age gracefully and does everything to protect her health. Lydia on the other hand insists on going without, she says she wants to feel the music in her bones.

Lydia is friends with almost every bouncer in the city. She hugs the bouncer and exchanges a few words with him in a friendly manner and he lets us in without asking for our ID. even though we're old enough to get into bars it still gives me anxiety. Heaven is a club favored by women. Jessie said they play mostly  'white girl music', which made me laugh.

Jessie and I secure our earplugs as Lydia opens the door. Disturbia by Rihanna is playing and we immediately start singing along. We sway to the beat as we make our way to the bar. The club is packed, luckily Lydia towers over most people, she's not afraid to wear heels even if they make her 6 foot tall. She guides us through the crowd. When we arrive at the bar I order 3 sour apple shots. Something we have in common is our distain for the taste of alcohol. We either order cocktails or shots with enough sugar to knock out a horse.

After shooting back the sweet and sour liquid I scan the crowd. The colorful lights bounce off of the disco ball in the middle of the room. Most people are dancing, some are screaming in each other's ears trying to have a conversation and a few people are getting real cozy in the dark corners of the club. I'm glad it's busy, that means I can lose myself in the crowd, at least that's the idea.

Just as my palms get clammy and I get the overwhelming urge to run, Jessie takes my hand and pulls me into the crowd. Right, stay calm, try to relax and enjoy the music, I tell myself.

We dance for a while and Lydia buys us two more shots each. I can start to feel the effect the alcohol has on my body, I'm starting to actually enjoy myself. I'm dragging my hands over my body feeling the fabric of my red dress, smiling and singing along to the music.

Moth to a flame by Swedish House Mafia and the Weeknd starts playing. I bump into the person behind me and turn to apologize. That's when I see him, standing before me with an apology hanging on his lips. I suck in a breath. His lips part slightly. The man before me is a little older than I am. He has dark hair that I can imagine running my hands through and a slightly hooked nose. He bends down. I put my hand on the fabric of his soft t-shirt prepared to push him away, when he bends down further and comes to a stop with his lips just inches from my ear. His sent ingulfs me. Warm and spicy tones that are unique in the best way.

'Wanna dance?' he asks, I can hear the smile in his voice.

I can't believe I'm doing this but I nod against him. He takes my hand which is still placed on his chest. He spins me around and catches my other hand in his as well. The chorus starts playing and  everyone in the room is singing along. We're getting squished together by all the people in the club and he catches me by the waist as I stumble into him. His eyes search mine for permission and I nod at him. His hands stay there as we dance. I laugh despite myself, I look up at him to find him already staring at me with a gaze so intense, so full of something I can only interpret as lust.

I look back to find Lydia and Jessie staring at me wide eyed. They look as shocked as I feel. Me, dancing with someone I've never met and enjoying myself? Lydia gives me a thumbs up and i return to dancing with the man in front of me. I'm feeling bold so I place my hands on top of his and guide them to my hips. I feel myself blushing. We stay that way for a long time. All through out S&M by Rihanna, Motive by Ariana Grande and Doja Cat and HEAVEN AND BACK by Chase Atlantic. We get close to kissing a few times, but we don't. I don't kiss people I've never met before, no matter how much I might want to, and apparently neither does he.

When the song ends and a slower tune comes on, he bends down again, his hands still on my hips and asks me, 'Do you want anything to drink?'

I almost accept when I remember I don't know this man, however handsome he is, it isn't safe.

'I don't take drinks from strange men in clubs', I say, smiling tipsily.

He nods understandingly while raking his hand through his hair.

'I'm going to get a drink, I'll be right back.' He says and disappears towards the bar.

'Where is he going?' Lydia asks concerned. Jessie leans in too.

'Just getting something to drink.' I tell them.

I return to dancing with my girlfriends.

After some time I start looking around for him but he's no where to be found. Jessie suggests getting another drink and I accept. I watch Lydia flirt with the bartender, I want to ask him if he has seen the guy I was dancing with but I don't. We take another shot.

He doesn't return and neither does the high he gave me. I try not to let it ruin my night.

We head home at 3 AM. Luckily our apartment is within walking distance and we don't have to spend money on a cab. We're sober enough to walk straight but we aren't sober enough to shut up. Lydia started it by singing Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter at the top of her lungs. Jessie started yelling at her to shut up and then I started whisper yelling at them both to keep quiet. That's when someone opened their window and yelled at us to 'Shut the fuck up'. Which, ofcourse, made Jessie and Lydia burst out in laughter. Safe to say I'm the most sober of the three, or just the one with the most social anxiety.

I fall asleep thinking of the feeling of his hands on my body.

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