A new beginning

The roadtrip

Jake's POV

We were driving in silence for twenty minutes straight. She seemed so overwhelmed by the Cullen's goodbyes, that I wanted to give her some time to calm down and think things through. It seemed like she needed it, and after twenty minutes it turned out I was right, because the tension left her face and shoulders and she sat back in a more relaxed way. I am so tuned to her emotions, even though I only knew her adult self for a week, I could read her easily already. I asked Paul about that a few days ago, and he said it's normal, wolves are very much in sync with their imprints. That's why I felt she needed some reassurance about what happened with Bella.

You were right. With Bella. - I say after a while. I was? - she sounds insecure. - I think I really hurt her feelings. Maybe. Bella wanted her little girl back for so long, I don't think she realized that you will be a grown up woman. Yeah, that's what I gathered as well.But it's okay to have boundaries with them. Whatever makes you feel comfortable. - I give her a small smile, and when she smiles back with a grateful expression on her face, I can't look away for a minute. She is so beautiful. I understand Bells, of course I always did, and a part of me wishes that she could just stay in that house for longer so I could be close to her, but another part of me knows that's not what she needs. And that is the bigger part, because I desperately want to give her what she needs. So, how about we stop at the grocery store to get some roadtrip snacks? - she asks, still with a smile on her face, and she starts to pull over for the closest grocery shop. I love that idea.

It's almost noon when we stop at the grocery shop, so after grabbing a ton of unhealthy snacks and drinks from the shop, we go through a drive through and have lunch as well. Nessie can eat as many burgers as me, which is five right now, but just because I am not that hungry, it is still impressive.

If you give me a comment about eating like a guy, I am gonna punch you. - she says while sticking a fry into her mouth. I wasn't planning to. - I say with a smirk and she rolls her eyes.Sure, I can see it in your eyes. The same macho bullshit happened when I was drinking whiskey. - she takes another bite of her last burger. We are sitting in a parking lot, and watching the forest on the other side of the road. I shake my head with a smile.I think you are impressive. That's all. - I say with a reassuring smile. I can't stop smiling around this woman. In the past years I don't think I smiled more than twice, and ever since she came back to my life I just can't stop doing it. She rolls her eyes again.Well, you are not so impressive to be honest. You keep feeding me from drive throughs, that would not go well on a date. - her tone is teasing and at this point I don't even want to stop the smirk on my face.I will definitely take you to nicer places when we have our first date, trust me. - it's a bold thing to say, and her smile falters for a minute. She seems confused, because my tone is teasing, but the confidence in my voice means that I am not joking at all. Funny. - she looks away with a dry laugh and gathers around our paper wraps and other trash remaining from the lunch. - Keep your promises to your next girlfriend, Jake. I am going to throw these out. - and with that, she is out of the car and walking towards the trash can. I got out as well, but I don't correct or explain what I said to her. I know she will be my next girlfriend, the one and only, and I will wait as long as she needs me to. And I can sense that the thought of dating me terrifies her. I can feel it, and see it on her face. And I don't like it one bit, but I don't dare to push her on it. Can I drive? - I ask instead and she gives me her keys with a hesitant smile.

Nessie officially claims the title of the DJ, and she puts on all kinds of music from her phone while I drive.

Do you have a favorite genre? - I ask, after listening through at least four different types of music. Not really. - she smiles. - I love all kinds of music. Okay, maybe the hollering and shouting type of music is a no go, but otherwise I can find joy in every other type of music. It really depends on my mood. So, no metal then? Definitely not. You? I like pop music, rap and rock mostly. Do you have any requests? - she asks with a smile. Something from Eminem. - she laughs, but compiles and puts on Godzilla from Eminem. I smirk at that. We listen to this a lot with the guys in the shop. He has good music. - she nods absentmindedly. - But he is an asshole in real life. You have met Eminem? - I look at her with wide-eyes and she just rolls her eyes.Of course. I work in the music industry, remember? I met with a lot of celebrities, work with half of them too. - she says it like it's not a big deal, and she probably sees the look I gave her because she continues with a smile. - I know it sounds stupid, but they are just people. Like everyone else, some of them are more talented than others, some of them are just lucky, or have good PR. But when you sit down with a famous person to talk or work with, it's really not that big of a deal. They have their own issues and their own conflicts, and what most people see is just a media representation of them. It's usually not very realistic. I get that. It's just glitters. - I nod, and she smirks at my choice of words. Mostly, yeah. And the press can be so annoying to deal with, that's why I work so hard to stay in the background, I don't want my name to be famous. It's not a burden I would like to carry. - she laughs a little. - And I almost ended up on the front page of a gossip magazine once. What happened? I worked hard to keep my name off my songs, and to work from the background with the artists, making them sign serious NDA's and all, and then I got stupid and went on a date with someone I shouldn't have. Someone famous? - I raise an eyebrow at her. Oh, yeah. - the way she says it means it was someone very famous. The thought that she has exes and such a big experience in dating already feels like a stab in the heart, but now I will keep thinking about if she dated someone who is known for the whole world. Is it a singer? Someone I listen to ? Maybe someone I like? Who was it? - I ask before I think it through. No, no. - she shakes her head. - Not telling. I promised myself I won't tell anyone, only Alex and one of my friends knows, and that's a lot too. It cost me a lot of money to not end on the news, and it was years ago anyway. Come on, I won't tell anyone. Still no. Is it a musician? Did you work with him? No. That's a golden rule, I don't date anyone I work with. Okay, so not a musician. Actor? Jake, stop it. I am not going to tell you. - she sighs and changes the music to Linkin Park. It's one of my favorite bands, and for a minute I am lost in the lyrics. Until I notice her smirk.Did you just change the music to distract me from questioning? Maybe. How did you know I like Linkin Park? Well, it's technically your generation's music. - she says generation in a teasing way, and I just roll my eyes. My generation? So you call me old? Maybe. Oh, yeah? And what is your generation's music? Hannah Montana? - she throws her head back with a laugh. And the sound captures my heart all over again. She is so beautiful, but when she laughs she is just breathtaking. It kind of is actually. - she nods. - We can listen to Hannah Montana, or I give you a better option, High School Musical. I know all the lyrics. - she starts to search on her phone. Oh, no, thank you. I am fine with Linkin Park. And don't think I am that easy to distract. Back to your famous boyfriend. Who was he? All I will give you is that he is in sports, and he was never my boyfriend. We dated like twice, the second time I spent the night with him and paparazzis took photos of me in the morning when I left. The photos didn't get to the newspaper, but it was a close call, he didn't mean anything so I stopped seeing him, and that's all there is to say. Now, please let's talk about something else.