EVER THING IS CANON (1 - 700)

chapter 1: the beginning

the smg4 movie Revelations Arc happens but when they blew up the god box it reseted the universe so 1000000000000000 years later and the universe restarted again but the 3rd time but it causes in explosion causing a bunch of other universe to explode and collided witch causes the world to regenerate but it cause almost but not all every single franchise, tv show, movie, books, web comics, web series and mascots all into one and In the Great Beyond in Galaxy C47, Somewhere in the Real World, a Universe is created when a Huge bang caused by Celestial beings happens and Forms many Different Dimensions and Planets causing the inter dimension theory. The Agents are Created to serve their Purpose. Deviant and useless programs set for deletion chootse to hide with The Decrypher. The God Box is created by Venjix and right after the creation The God Box is sealed away by the Agents. The magic railroad is also founded by the magical conductors, Jackie chus great great great great grandfather was also born this year. Then The Ancient Mayans met up with aliens, stole the alien's golden egg, and buried it in a future site which would later be known as Florida. The year is negative 9999999999999999999 and our first ever entity is born named gerwjiohjfdgjdsfghdfgsbgbigdfbiidf created himself cuz he was broad and had nothing to do. Year -9999. Gerwjiohjfdgjdsfghdfgsbgbigdfbiidf, nigel for short was bored and was tired of his Iphone and his lamborghini and his mansion and blah blah blah he was spoiled, so he had 13751423962519347 children and they all came from different mothers, don't ask. His children Are named god, god, god ,god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god god, god, god ,god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god ,god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god god, god, god ,god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god and frank. How ever he was an abusive father who would beat and torture his kids. To his kids it was annoying but hey you had to deal with it. it all be like this until the year 0 when one of his children named God. had a huge boss fight with him. They knocked him out and ran. The year is now 1 and finally god found a new galaxy, they all cheered and god ate a milky way bar and named it the milky way universe. God created the first ever country called heaven and now most people don't consider heaven as a country but god did not care and he also let all the gods change their names and he let some make their own religions and that's why there are different religions. The year 16 is where a lot of events happened. God was arm wrestling with his homie jose but he was gonna let it rip, and he put the lighter up to his buns but when it came out it made an explosion creating earth and the rest of the planets. It was a hot mess like the current world. He called up Bob the Builder's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great- grandpa named joe. to fix things. Joe was a no-nonsense guy, though a bit absent-minded after a few too many millennia. God was like, 'Joe, buddy, can you piece this planet together in, like, seven days?' Joe said and I quote "I murdered multiple leaders with this hammer." God took 3 steps back and sipped his purple Kool-Aid, and joe got to work. On day one, he flicked the switch on light and dark—boom, day and night sorted. Day two, he whipped up the atmosphere and figured out where to stash all that water—sky and sea, easy peasy. Day three, Joe molded the Earth, plopped down some continents, and sprinkled in a bunch of plants and trees to make it pretty. By day four, Joe was really feeling himself. He hung up the sun for daytime vibes and tossed in the moon and stars for a sweet nightcap. Day five, he was on a roll—fish for the oceans, birds for the skies, and a thumbs-up for them to go forth and multiply. Now real quick the sun was originally supposed to be a planet but was changed to a star. Come day six, Joe was in full DIY mode. He cranked out animals left and right, from lumbering elephants to cheeky monkeys. Some walked, some slithered, and some just looked really confused. And on the seventh day? Well, Joe took a well-deserved break and admired his handiwork—earth, animals, and all the countries (even if they were still unnamed and a bit wonky). Now, this creation gig wasn't without its quirks. God had a thing for purple Kool-Aid, and Joe, bless his heart, was known to mix up a few species. You might wonder why some critters look like they were designed after a night of heavy drinking (looking at you, platypus). But hey, who's counting? We then meet Lucifer the devil, but before he became the devil he was an angel. He was a very respectable man in his college days and was very nice. He was studying for a math test which would make him a doctor and he needed to study so he went to the local heaven library, the expiring day for the book was 7 days but lucifer forgot so he was one day late, god found out and decide to kill a dear, rip off its horns, stitch it onto lucifer and then banish him from ever seeing his friends or family again. Lucifer changed his name to Craig the Devil and made the website craigs list and a car dealership called crazy craigs. God created many different animals and two humans, a boy and a girl. a boy named Adam and a girl named lilith. Adam and Lilith were the first humans created by the god and concept art was created by the Angels, made to be equal and lived in the Garden of Eden. However, Adam wanted total control over Lilith, but she refused and left him. Adam would later be given a new wife, Eve. Eve was just straight up a bitch and Lilith just died somehow and went to heaven. They say Adam was the first human soul in heaven but really it was lilith. Back to Adam and Eve. They lived in what will be California in the eden, there was food, drinks, anything they could want but there was one tree called the pleasure tree and it had apples with wine in them, he said not to touch it. Craigs was a little pissed that god ruined his life so he did a little prank. Where he possessed a snake and went and told them and eve and said and i quote "hey well you know how god said not to eat it well he was lying you can eat it" and they said "OK" so they ate it and god found out so he grabbed a sharpe rock and cut off adams willy with it and then cut hole into eves privates with the same rock and painfully stitched adams willy on, it was the most painful thing ever. It was so painful they both shot themselves. the gun now in the mushroom kingdom history museum in aubergine. The gun itself was a Smith and Wesson model model 500 which they hand crafted. This was the first gun ever if you don't count the ones in heaven. After that he said no one will ever eat from you again so he shoots the trees. Now Craig was feeling like crap but at the same time he did not think god was gonna do that, that was the first ever sex change and the prank was on april 1st so that's how april fools was made. Craig still has nightmares about it and constantly says sorry. We cut to the year 19 where a few more big events happen, craig teams up with bob the builders great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandfather to make hell city, oh yeah a titan named john died and i guess the boiling isles are from but the seas were so hot nothin could not go there and there for everyone that lives there thinks there the only isle in the globe however we will soon see that will be disproven. So humans have been gone for a while but then a new form of life is spotted on earth called the dinosaurs god thought "cool something to dictate" but the dinosaurs said "NO" and they were not havin it because The dinosaurs were very smart and somehow know to speak english and when god try to defeat them they said "Get Your Skinny A## outta here" somehow they managed to smack god right in the face so he was pissed but how many time he try to defeat them they would slap him over and over again. the first ever dinosaur and his name was Seraphina Arabella Clementine Adelaide Beatrice Alexandra Wellington-Fitzgerald, Duchess of Cornwall Shire, Lady Protector of the Eastern Marches, High Priestess of the Ancient Order of the Silver Moon, and Custodian of the Royal Menagerie.The dinosaurs created internet, gaming, cars, lights, tv, cities, train and a whole lot of other crap and then every single tv show or movie about dinosaurs happens including all parades and time travel movies with dinosaurs and george the volcano an immortal god is born by a pizza maker called papa johns. These all happen in the same year. The year is now 100 and Dinosaur train dose technically happen but there is a few differences in the show. A pterodactyl couple have four eggs and was looking good until the birth of the babies three of them were pterodactyls but one was a T rex and the father got pissed and kicked the mother out of the house but not after a good'o shin kicking, after that they became hobos who rode on a train called the dinosaur train and yeah, things were bad but then the mom met a stegosaurus and did the dirty and then the stegosaurus proposed and said "i love and your kids and your bastard son and i love so will you marry me?" But before she could say anything the train lost control and crashed into a volcano which just so happened to be right by the nuclear power plant which also was next to a tnt factory which was also next to the military bomb storage which was next to a gas factory. It was the biggest explosion ever and it killed all the dinosaurs in europe, then God got angry and threw a Meteor at the Earth causing the extinction of all the Dinosaurs and the end of the Cretaceous Period, a dinosaur egg is left underground because of the incident and would remain there until 2020. However the dinosaurs in alaska are barely hanging on and then the last episode of that 80s tv show dinosaurs happens and they all die from the cold, how ever a small island called yoshi island, home of the yoshis is unaffected by...the incident witch won't be the last incident by the way, but a miracle happen, an area of land got hit with only the radiation, this land was filled with mushrooms, it mutated them but not in a creepy way, they were like humans but smaller and had mushrooms on their head. These creatures were called suhsbags which was Sudric for toad, they speaked a mix of human english but there own language called Sudric, they started their own country called the Mushroom Kingdom where most of our events in the future will take place, the kingdom had no real government but there was no need for it at the time since there was really no need for one and yeah there was barely any crimes, then one day God found Himself with an abundance of free time and a surplus of creative mod, He embarked on a journey across the world. His first stop: Egypt. Now, imagine the Almighty strolling through the land of sand and sphinxes, thinking, "Let's fu#k some sh## UP!" With a flick of His celestial wrist, He conjured blocks and began stacking them with the precision of a master builder on a sugar high. Behold, the pyramids! Yes, those majestic structures that baffle historians and conspiracy theorists alike to this day. But God wasn't satisfied with just one architectural marvel; He was on a roll. Next up: standing stones. Imagine Stonehenge, but on a global scale. Stone piles as far as the eye could see, like a divine game of Jenga played by giants. And then, feeling mischievous, He decided to show off His stacking skills one last time. He piled blocks higher and higher until He had created a towering structure that would later be known as Mount Everest. But in His infinite wisdom, He decided to call it "Fort God," because why not add a touch of whimsy to the tallest point on Earth? Now, as any creator would, God decided to try His hand at making humans again. But these newly minted mortals, being the cheeky creatures they were, promptly started building pyramids in Mexico. God raised an eyebrow (figuratively speaking) and thought, "Not on my watch!" So, with a hearty chuckle, He punched the ground, resulting in the Grand Canyon—a colossal ditch that doubled as a testament to His impromptu landscaping skills. God is still proud of the canyon to this day. Enter our protagonist, Noah. God, still recovering from His playful bout of planet-punching, tapped Noah on the shoulder and said, "Hey, buddy, you know boats, right? I need you to build a big one. Oh, and bring along every animal you can find. I'm feeling nostalgic but too lazy to redo my masterpiece." Noah, being a practical sort with a knack for carpentry and a healthy dose of skepticism, took on the challenge. Two by two, he corralled creatures from across the land and sea, from lions to lemurs, penguins to pangolins. As the rain began to pour and the floodwaters rose, Noah set sail on what would become the world's most infamous cruise—a floating menagerie that would make even Noah's neighbors jealous. Now what happened to noah, well he made a company named Yamaha, Brunswick Corporation witch is still around today. Also the same year in the land of Babel, a bunch of selfie-loving, TikTok-obsessed millennials decided to build the ultimate social media tower. They were like, "Hey, let's make this tower reach to the heavens so everyone can see us trend globally!" So armed with Instagram filters and avocado toast for energy, they began stacking up bricks made of recycled iPhone boxes and unicorn tears. As the tower grew taller, reaching heights never seen before, the Kardashians tried to trademark its design. But just as they were about to livestream the tower's grand opening, God decided to intervene, iPhone in hand, of course. God took a big sip of pumpkin spice latte and said, "Hold up, fam! This ain't happening on my watch." So He whipped out His divine smartphone and tweeted, "Let's spice things up! #ConfusionModeOn." Instantly, everyone started speaking in emoji code that only Gen Z could understand, leaving the millennials in complete chaos. The tower project ground to a halt as people were like, "Wait, what does that emoji mean again?" They tried to Google Translate, but it only spat out K-pop lyrics and cat memes. Without a common language, the influencers couldn't coordinate their hashtag campaigns or agree on which filter made them look more celestial. God, chuckling to Himself, dispersed the crowd over the face of the Earth, where they eventually settled in different lands, each still trying to outdo the other in social media prowess. And so, the Tower of Babel became an ancient meme, a cautionary tale about the perils of selfie-stick hubris and the importance of backing up your cloud data. And to this day, if you listen carefully, you can hear the echoes of confused hashtags and influencer drama from that fateful construction site in Babel. The day after the chaotic Tower of Babel incident, when emojis and hashtags still echoed in the wind, Abram, chilling in Haran with his family, received a celestial DM. It was like, "Abram, leave your fam squad and head to a land I'll show you. Trust me, it's gonna be lit. #NewBeginnings #PromisedLand" Abram was like, "Whoa, Big Guy, this is a major plot twist after yesterday's language mix-up! But okay, let's roll." So, he gathered up his wife Sarai, his nephew Lot, and all their flock, loading up their camels and dromedaries. Sarai was checking the weather app, and Lot was taking a selfie with the #BabelFail tower in the background. As they trekked across the desert, dodging leftover construction materials from the half-finished tower (which had become an Insta-famous landmark), Abram was like, "God, are we there yet?" And God was like, "Almost, just keep following the celestial navigation. #TrustMe" Finally, they arrived in Canaan, where the sky was clear, and the stars were popping. God appeared and was like, "Yo, Abram, welcome to the Promised Land! Your descendants are gonna be more numerous than all the tweets ever tweeted. It's gonna be epic. #Blessed" Abram was blown away. He was like, "God, you're the real influencer here." And God was like, "I know, right? #DivinePlans" But Abram and Sarai were pushing a bit in years, and the stork hadn't visited yet. God was like, "Don't worry, I got you." And sure enough, a little while later, Sarah was rocking a baby bump. They named their son Isaac, which means "laughter," because Sarah couldn't stop laughing with joy. It was the ultimate turnaround from yesterday's tower drama to today's baby shower plans. And so, Abram's epic journey from Babel's aftermath to the Promised Land became the talk of the desert, a tale of faith, trust, and divine emojis that shaped generations to come. After the tower of Babel debacle settled down, Abraham, Sarah, and their crew were chilling in Canaan, the land God had promised them. They had left their homeland behind and were ready for whatever adventure came their way. One sunny afternoon, while Abraham was lounging outside his tent scrolling through celestial Instagram, three unexpected guests popped up out of nowhere. Abraham, always the hospitable patriarch, welcomed them with a deep bow and quickly directed Sarah to whip up some artisanal bread, while he fetched a prime calf for a barbecue feast that would've impressed Gordon Ramsay. As they dined, the guests dropped a bombshell: "Hey, Abe, guess what? Sarah's gonna have a baby!" Sarah, who was eavesdropping from inside the tent with her Kindle (because even matriarchs need some downtime), burst out laughing. She was pushing retirement age, and the thought of diapers and midnight feedings seemed more absurd than a Kanye tweetstorm. When God asked why she laughed, Sarah, caught off guard, brushed it off with a witty quip. But God assured her, "Yep, you're gonna be a mom." Sure enough, Sarah gave birth to a son and they named him Isaac, which means laughter, because seriously, who could have predicted this plot twist? Years later, when Isaac was old enough to borrow the family camel, God decided to test Abraham's commitment to parenthood in the most dramatic way possible. He told Abraham, "Take Isaac up a mountain and offer him as a sacrifice." Abraham, trying to keep up with the divine drama, nodded like a contestant on a reality show and packed up their camping gear. As they trekked up the mountain, Isaac, always the curious teenager, asked, "Dad, where's the lamb for the sacrifice?" Abraham, channeling his best Marvel superhero dad vibes, replied, "Don't worry, kiddo, God's got a surprise twist coming." When they reached the peak, Abraham set up the sacrificial BBQ pit, tied up Isaac, and sharpened his knife like he was auditioning for a survival show. Just as he was about to make the cut, God hit pause on the action scene and sent an angel to shout, "Hold up, Abe! You've proven your dedication. Use this ram instead." Abraham, relieved and a bit sweaty from the near-miss, thanked God for the last-minute save. God, impressed by Abraham's willingness to follow script, promised him a sequel full of blessings and descendants as numerous as Avengers sequels. And so, Abraham and Isaac hiked back down the mountain, with a newfound appreciation for family bonding and divine plot twists. They lived happily ever after, in a saga worthy of a Hollywood blockbuster. The caveman age happens and all shows, movies, books and blah blah blah happens so yeah, The Shrek movies happened so i am going to explain them. Shrek, a grouchy, mean, selfish yet insecure green ogre that has always enjoyed living in peaceful solitude in his swamp, finds his life disrupted when numerous fairy-tale beings, including Pinocchio, the Three Little Pigs, and Donkey, are forced into the swamp by order of the obsessive, perfectionist, fairy-tale despising Lord Farquaad. Shrek leaves the swamp to ask Farquaad for the return of his privacy, with his new friend Donkey happily tagging along. Meanwhile, Farquaad tortures the Gingerbread Man into revealing the whereabouts of the remaining fairy-tale creatures until his guards rush in with an object Farquaad has been searching for: the Magic Mirror. The Mirror tells him that Farquaad can only become a real king by marrying a princess (completely disregarding his original question regarding if his kingdom was the fairest of them all). The Mirror gives him three princesses to choose from (in a parody of The Dating Game): Cinderella, Snow White, and Princess Fiona. Farquaad chooses Fiona and silences the Mirror before he can mention "the little thing that happens at night" (which is later revealed to be a curse). Shrek and Donkey arrive at Farquaad's palace in Duloc, where they find themselves in the midst of a tournament. The winner will have the "privilege" of attempting to rescue Fiona from a castle surrounded by lava and protected by a fire-breathing dragon so that Farquaad may marry her. Shrek (with some help from Donkey) easily beats the other knights in a fashion that resembles a wrestling match and Farquaad agrees to remove the fairy-tale creatures from the swamp if Shrek rescues Fiona. Shrek and Donkey travel to the castle and split up to find Fiona. Donkey encounters the dragon and sweet-talks the beast to save himself before discovering that the dragon is female. Dragon takes a liking to Donkey and carries him to her chambers. When Shrek finds Fiona, she is appalled at his lack of romanticism. As they are leaving, Shrek manages to save Donkey, caught in Dragon's tender clutches, and causing her to become irate, chasing Shrek, Fiona, and Donkey out of the castle. At first, Fiona is thrilled to be rescued but quickly becomes disappointed when Shrek takes his helmet off and she realizes that he is an ogre. The three make their return journey to Farquaad's palace, with Shrek and Fiona finding that they have more in common with each other along the way and falling in love. However, at night, Fiona refuses to camp with them, taking shelter in a nearby cave until morning. Shrek and Donkey stay awake and watch the stars while Shrek informs Donkey that he plans to build a 10-foot wall around his swamp when he returns. When Donkey persistently asks Shrek why he is doing this, Shrek sadly confesses to him that everyone judges him before they get to know him. Therefore, he feels he is better off alone, despite Donkey's admittance that he did not immediately judge him when they first met. Fiona hears this and decides to be kinder to Shrek the next day. The next night, Fiona takes shelter in a nearby windmill. When Donkey hears strange noises coming from the windmill, he finds Fiona has turned into an ogress. Fiona explains she was cursed as a child and turns into an ogress every night, which is why she was locked away in the castle, and that only a kiss from her true love will return her to her "love's true form". Shrek, about to confess his feelings for Fiona, overhears part of their conversation, and is heartbroken as he misinterprets her disgust at her transformation into an "ugly beast" as being disgusted with him. Fiona makes Donkey promise not to tell Shrek about the spell, vowing to do it herself, but when the next morning comes, Shrek has brought Lord Farquaad to Fiona. The two return to the castle, while a hurt Shrek returns to the now-vacated swamp, not long after breaking off his friendship with Donkey, out of anger. Shrek finds that, despite his privacy, he is miserable and misses Fiona. Donkey comes to the swamp, angry at Shrek and Shrek reveals that he overheard their conversation. Donkey keeps his promise to Fiona and tells Shrek that she was talking about someone else. He then tells him that Fiona will be getting married shortly, urging Shrek into action to gain Fiona's true love. They are able to travel to Duloc quickly, thanks to Dragon, who had escaped her confines and followed Donkey. They interrupt the wedding before Farquaad can kiss Fiona, but not before the sun sets, which causes Fiona to turn into an ogress in front of everyone. While her transformation causes Shrek to fully understand what he overheard at the windmill, Farquaad, disgusted over the change, orders Shrek killed and Fiona imprisoned, but Shrek whistles for Dragon, who bursts in and devours Farquaad. Shrek and Fiona admit their love for each other and share a kiss; Fiona is bathed in light as her curse is broken but is surprised to find that she has remained an ogress, as she thought she was supposed to become beautiful, to which Shrek replies that she is beautiful. The two of them get married in the swamp and depart on their honeymoon while the rest celebrate by singing "I'm a Believer". come back from their honeymoon, they find an invitation to a royal ball with Fiona's parents to celebrate their marriage, an event Shrek is reluctant to participate in. Fiona, Shrek, and Donkey (voiced by Eddie Murphy) travel to the kingdom of Far Far Away and meet Fiona's parents, King Harold and Queen Lillian (voiced by John Cleese and Julie Andrews), who are surprised by Fiona's choice of husband and her new appearance. Harold becoming repulsed and at a shared meal, Shrek and Harold get into a heated argument over how Shrek and Fiona will raise their family. Fiona, disgusted at Shrek's and her father's behavior, locks herself away in her room that evening, where she meets her Fairy Godmother (voiced by Jennifer Saunders), who is also surprised at Fiona's new looks. Shrek worries that he has lost his true love, particularly after finding the diary from her teen hood and reading that she was once infatuated with Prince Charming (voiced by Rupert Everett). King Harold is accosted by the Fairy Godmother and Charming, her son. He had arranged with the Fairy Godmother that Prince Charming would overcome many obstacles in order to rescue Fiona and break the spell, finding instead the Big Bad Wolf using the tallest tower as a hangout. They reprimand Harold for breaking an old promise that Charming would be able to marry Fiona and demand that he finds a way to get rid of Shrek. After Shrek reads Fiona's diary and pages containing the single phrase "Mrs. Fiona Charming", Harold arranges for Shrek and Donkey to join him on a fictitious hunting trip, which really is a trap to lure the two into the hands of an assassin, Puss in Boots (voiced by Antonio Banderas). When Fiona realizes that Shrek left, she asks her father for help, but he replies that he always wanted the best for her and that she should think about what is the best for her, too. Puss is unable to defeat Shrek and, revealing that he was paid by Harold, asks to come along as a way to make amends. Shrek decides to go to the Fairy Godmother for help. However, the Fairy Godmother states that ogres do not live "happily ever after." Nonetheless, the three sneak into the Fairy Godmother's potion factory and steal a "Happily Ever After" potion that Shrek believes will restore Fiona's love for him. Shrek and Donkey both drink the potion, which doesn't appear to work, but when it starts to rain, they leave, and in doing so they fail to notice that a mushroom that Shrek previously sneezed potion on changes into a beautiful rose. They wait out the storm in a barn and, while there, Shrek and Donkey become dizzy and fall over and into a deep sleep. When they awake, they discover the potion has taken effect: Shrek is now a handsome human, while Donkey has turned into a stallion. In order to make the change permanent, Shrek must kiss Fiona by midnight. He, Donkey, and Puss return to the castle to discover that the potion has also transformed Fiona back into her former, human self. However, the Fairy Godmother, having learned of the potion's theft, sends Charming to the castle, where he poses as Shrek to win Fiona's love. Although Harold recognizes Charming for who he really is, he doesn't speak up. Shrek sees Charming and Fiona together, and the Fairy Godmother tricks him into thinking that they have fallen in love and urges him to leave. Believing Fiona to be happier with Charming, Shrek sadly leaves. Realizing that Fiona hasn't fallen for Charming, the Fairy Godmother gives Harold a love potion to put in Fiona's tea, which will cause her to fall in love with the first person she kisses. Harold, knowing that it is wrong to do that to Fiona, refuses, but the Fairy Godmother threatens to take away his 'Happily Ever After', which she helped him get. Shrek, Donkey and Puss overhear the exchange, and are noticed by the Fairy Godmother, who has them arrested by the royal guards and thrown into a dungeon, in a parody of COPS. When the royal ball begins, several of Shrek's friends band together to free the trio (having seen their arrest via the Magic Mirror) and create a gigantic gingerbread man (whose name is Mongo), which breaks through the castle's defenses so Shrek can stop Charming from kissing Fiona, but Mongo is presumably killed when his arms break and he falls into the moat with Gingy devastated. When Shrek arrives, Charming forcibly kisses Fiona, who then knocks him out with a headbutt. When the Fairy Godmother confronts Harold, he reveals that he never gave Fiona the love potion, having realized her love for Shrek. The Fairy Godmother tries to attack Shrek and Fiona with a spell from her wand, presumably to kill him, but it rebounds off Harold's armor when he commits self-sacrifice to save Shrek and disintegrates the Fairy Godmother into a cloud of bubbles; it also returns Harold to his true form, that of the Frog Prince. The Fairy Godmother had made a deal with Harold to turn him into a handsome man, so that he could win over Lillian, to make her kiss him and change him into a human permanently, in exchange for Charming marrying his soon-to-be daughter. Harold apologizes to Shrek and Fiona for everything he has done, and now realizes what is best for Fiona. Shrek forgives him, and Lillian tells Harold that she still loves him no matter what. When it is almost midnight, Shrek tells Fiona that if they kiss now, then their change will be permanent. But Fiona says that she wants to spend her life with the ogre she married, and Shrek and Fiona let the potion's effects wear off, with Donkey changing back as well, much to his chagrin. Harold gives his blessing to the marriage, and the party resumes as Puss and Donkey (along with Mongo) sing "Livin' la Vida Loca". In a flashback, King Harold (John Cleese) and Queen Lillian (Julie Andrews) are about to sign the kingdom of Far Far Away over to "Rumpel" Rumpelstiltskin (Walt Dohrn), in exchange for lifting their daughter Princess Fiona's (Cameron Diaz) curse. The deal is canceled at the last second when a messenger informs the king and queen that Fiona has been rescued. In the present time, an angry Rumpel laments his loss and wishes that Fiona's rescuer; Shrek (Mike Myers), was never born. Meanwhile, Shrek has grown steadily weary of being a family man and celebrity among the villagers, leading him to long for when he was feared and had privacy. When he takes his family to a restaurant in Far Far Away to celebrate his children's first birthday, an escalating series of mishaps further injure his ego, causing him to walk out in anger.Having observed the outburst, Rumpel follows Shrek and arranges for him to appear to save his life. Inside Rumpel's carriage, Shrek laments that he is no longer a "real ogre". Pretending to thank Shrek for his good deed earlier, Rumpel offers Shrek a deal: A Day as a "real ogre" in exchange for a day from his childhood. Shrek signs the contract and is whisked away into an alternate reality. Now feared by the villagers, Shrek takes the opportunity to cause some lighthearted mischief until he finds that Fiona is a fugitive and his home deserted and desolate. Knocked out and kidnapped by witches, he wakes up in a caged cart driven by Donkey (Eddie Murphy), who has never met him. Donkey tells Shrek he's being taken to Rumpel, now the king of the derelict Far Far Away. Rumpel reveals that he erased the day Shrek was born, meaning Shrek never existed in this alternate time-line. Consequently, Harold and Lillian were forced to sign the kingdom over to Rumpel. When the day ends, Shrek will no longer exist. He escapes Rumpel's castle with Donkey. Initially terrified of Shrek, Donkey decides to trust him after seeing him cry over his erased history. Donkey helps Shrek find a hidden exit clause; the contract can be nullified by "true love's kiss". They soon encounter a still-cursed Fiona leading an army of ogres in a resistance against Rumpel. Shrek discovers a lazy and overweight Puss in Boots (Antonio Banderas) being kept as Fiona's pet. Shrek does everything he can to win over Fiona, but she is cynical and disillusioned about the power of true love after nobody rescued her, and she's too busy preparing for an ambush on Rumpel. While sparring with Shrek, Fiona begins to take a liking to him, but they stop short of kissing. Puss encourages Shrek to continue pursuing Fiona. During the ambush, the ogres are captured by the Pied Piper (Jeremy Steig), but Shrek and Fiona escape with the help of Puss and Donkey. Shrek insists that Fiona kiss him, assuring her that it will fix everything; she reluctantly obliges, but nothing happens since she's not in love. When he hears that Rumpel is offering a wish to the one who brings him Shrek, Shrek turns himself in. Rumpel is forced to grant the wish to Shrek, and he uses it to free the other ogres. They storm the castle, battle the witches, and capture Rumpel. But Fiona has been imprisoned by Rumpel as she was never all ogre. As the sun rises, Shrek begins to fade from existence. Having fallen in love with him, Fiona kisses Shrek just before he disappears. Seeing that she's still an ogre in the sunlight, Fiona realizes her curse was broken and that she's assumed "love's true form". The alternate reality disintegrates, and everyone disappears with Rumpel being the last to vanish. Shrek is transported back to the original time-line before he lost his temper at the party. Instead of lashing out, he embraces family and friends with a newfound appreciation. Now you might be wondering and i quote "were is shrek the third?" and i am here to tell you that IT NEVER EXISTED. Following the events of "Shrek Forever After," Shrek initially enjoys a period of peace and happiness. The curse is lifted, and he continues to live in blissful harmony with Fiona and their children. However, over time, the pressures of family life and the expectations of being a hero begin to weigh heavily on him. Shrek, once known for his resilience and bravery, finds himself increasingly overwhelmed by the challenges of parenthood and domestic life. His coping mechanism shifts from facing external threats to seeking solace in something he can control: food. In particular, cheesecake becomes a source of comfort and distraction for him. Initially, indulging in cheesecake provides Shrek with a temporary escape from his responsibilities and stresses. However, as his reliance on cheesecake grows, it transforms into a full-blown addiction. The rich, creamy dessert offers him a fleeting sense of pleasure and relief from his inner turmoil. As Shrek's addiction deepens, it strains his relationships with Fiona and their children. His obsession with cheesecake leads to neglect of his family duties and emotional distance. Fiona, once his pillar of support, becomes increasingly concerned and frustrated by his inability to confront his issues. Shrek's addiction takes a toll on his physical health. His weight balloons, and he begins to suffer from serious health complications such as diabetes and heart problems. Despite warnings from loved ones and health professionals, he struggles to break free from the cycle of addiction. One fateful day, tensions between Shrek and Fiona reach a boiling point. Frustrated and consumed by anger over his inability to control his addiction and his perceived failures as a husband and father, Shrek lashes out in a moment of rage. In a fit of uncontrollable anger, he inadvertently pushes Fiona during a heated argument. The force of the push causes Fiona to stumble and fall, hitting her head on a sharp edge as she falls. The impact is fatal, and within moments, Shrek realizes the gravity of what he has done. Shock and horror grip him as he kneels beside Fiona's lifeless body, unable to comprehend the irreversible tragedy he has caused. Overcome with guilt and remorse, Shrek's world shatters into fragments. The consequences of his actions ripple through the entire community, leaving him ostracized and tormented by grief. His once-bright future now seems bleak and irreparable, haunted by the memory of Fiona and the weight of his unforgivable mistake. As authorities investigate Fiona's death, Shrek faces legal repercussions for his actions. The once-beloved hero becomes a symbol of tragedy and remorse, grappling with the consequences of his anger and addiction. Despite remorse and attempts to make amends, the loss of Fiona remains a haunting reminder of his darkest moment. Shrek was sent to jail his prison cell just so happen to have the frist ever toilet in a jail cell and he was the first to use it but because of his wait he got stuck for 1,906 years but was saved, while this is happening a entay named Cthulhu is brought to hjgfk which will become a town called south park in the future makes a thing where you know the simpsons and family guy they stay 9 for 90 years, thats why. Cthulhu is a gigantic, inter-dimensional deity, miles high. He is shown towering over a DP (formerly BP) drilling platform. He has two long, massive arms with sharp talons. He has two large bat-like wings on his back. He also has two clawed back legs. He has a long tail, which seems to be used to direct himself through the air. His head has two massive yellow eyes, similar to that of a dinosaur's. Instead of a mouth, he has a large set of tentacles that move whenever he "talks", or makes vocal sounds. Though his appearance alone can drive people insane, this is apparently not the case with everyone in the South Park universe, who react normally to his presence. You remember those darn Agents that were on the first page? Well now they use "seeds" to cyberform many different dimensions, converting their matter into a shapeshifting ink that would come to be known as Inkling Ink. That all happened in one year by the way. The year 115 starts off weird, A professor named Egad created a cryogenic capsule that could freeze someone for thousands of years. At this time, this professor created a Telephone, Tartar, that stored humanity's knowledge, and put it in the cryogenic capsule. Global water levels recede, forcing many marine creatures on what used to be Earth's dry land to evolve and become more intelligent. Some of these creatures also develop a humanoid structure. For example, squids evolve into Inklings, while octopi evolve into Octarians and Octolings. The Mollusk Era begins. Zelus, Summer and Other Inklings and Octolings are born. Judd is released from his capsule, and becomes the judge of the earliest known Turf Wars. Then Venjix started to consider the universe Imperfect and started a plan to make a Perfect Universe, but they discovered the chosen system contained a life-bearing world, and so seven of the Agents objected to using the God Box on the Universe. Venjix, however, insisted on using the God Box anyway upon weighing the longevity of his Idea and his race against a seemingly meaningless organic world. This Agent quickly turned on his brothers and their creed, waging war against them, with those who agreed with his ideals by his side. After attacking and killing many of his fellow Agents and slaughtering a large number of early Inklings he was thereafter ever known as "The Betrayed." The remaining Agents mounted an attack on their new nemesis and hid the God Box—without which he could not use—in a tomb composed of their own bodies on the very planet he sought to destroy, using the last of their energy left from the epic battle to completely seal it. We then go to Hawaii where The Atlantis came from their native planet and blew the oldest living bubble. And in what will be soon in bikini bottom, SpongeGar and Patar are the ancestors of spongebob and patrick were cavemen and were bored and had nothing to do and then a time traveling Squidward invented jellyfishing but sponge and star go ape shit and attack him. Bikini Bottom population is so far 23. And then in the year 199 a different spongegar and patar and Sqoug discover fire somehow. The year is 200 and society has really come along and caring even falls in love with a human girl. Inkopolis and Calamari County are founded. Calamari County's customary chorus is composed to celebrate and respect the bounty of the sea; however Sea levels rise again, forcing the Inklings (With The Octolings as Allies) and Octarians to fight over the remaining dry land. Around that time, the Octarians built the Great Octoweapons. Ammoses Shellendorf creates five (or eight) blueprints for weapons, including one for the Hero Shot Replica. The Octarians were victorious through the course of the Great War, aided by their Great Octoweapons. However, a plug being pulled off deactivated their weaponry, allowing their Inkling enemies to prevail and defeat them. The Octarians were later forced into hiding in Octo Valley, where they built and lived in underground domes. The Turf Wars become a popular competitive sport instead of a serious conflict, as they used to be years ago. But then something happens when Zelus loses the first Splatfest and Becomes Rouge making her Become a Virus. The mushroom kingdom also grew when new creatures inhabited known as the Koopas, The Gombas, The shy guys and all of those other guys, it was also around this time Sarsaland was founded. Since then the mushroom kingdom and sarsaland have been close allies. The year is now 250. And when SpongeBob and Patrick saved King Krabs' Daughter, the two chosen ones (two links) came. Then king krabs invent the krabby patty for the first time, this won't be the first time it will be discovered. Then Atlantis sank and then Agent Oliver created Alpha 7 and the RPM Gems before going Offline. The first Neptune dynasty took the throne of Bikini Bottom after the Krabs dynasty lost power (and the Krabby Patty recipe) in the 12th century. Many places are created like bowling ball areas and old folks' homes. I won't blame you if you get confused. This was also the year the Greek philosophers happened. The Socratic philosophers in ancient Greece were Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle. These are some of the most well-known of all Greek philosophers. Socrates (470/469–399 B.C.E.) is remembered for his teaching methods and for asking thought-provoking questions. Also, the Israelites were chilling in the Promised Land after Joshua's epic conquests. But things took a nosedive real quick. Joshua kicks the bucket at a ripe old age, and the next generation totally forgets about God and starts doing all sorts of shady stuff. Cue facepalm moment. God's like, "Seriously, guys?" and sends in these judges to save the day. Think of them like the Avengers, but with less spandex and more divine intervention. First up, Othniel, Ehud, and now... drumroll, please... Deborah! Deborah wasn't your average judge. She wasn't just calling out their bad behavior; she was leading the charge against the bad guys too. Picture Wonder Woman meets Judge Judy. She's all like, "Israelites, stop worshipping idols and get your act together!" But, as usual, the Israelites can't stick to the script. They're like a reality TV show gone wrong. So, God lets them get trounced by King Jabin of Canaan, who's rolling in with his 900 iron chariots and making life miserable for 20 long years. It's like the Israelites got stuck in a medieval version of "Fast & Furious," but with more sand and less Vin Diesel. Meanwhile, Sisera, Jabin's main man, is causing chaos left and right. He's like the Darth Vader of the ancient world, but instead of a Death Star, he's got those iron chariots wreaking havoc. Deborah, not one to back down, calls up Barak, this warrior dude who's probably binge-watched every season of "Game of Thrones" for battle strategies. She's like, "Barak, time to rally the troops. We're taking down Sisera and his posse!" Barak's all nervous like, "Uh, can you come with me, Deborah? I don't do well with big battles without a fearless leader by my side." Deborah rolls her eyes and agrees. They gather their troops, and it's about to go down. It's like the ultimate showdown between good and evil, with more drama than a Kardashian family reunion. Long story short, Deborah and Barak pull off this epic surprise attack, and Sisera gets wrecked. He's running for his life, but ends up getting a nasty surprise when Jael, this total badass woman, drives a tent peg through his skull while he's taking a nap. Talk about a plot twist! The Israelites are saved, and Deborah becomes the OG girl boss of ancient Israel. She's like the Beyoncé of judges, inspiring everyone with her leadership and fierce determination. But, of course, this being the Book of Judges, the cycle of disobedience and redemption continues. Next up, Gideon and Samson get their turn in the spotlight, and trust me, their stories are even crazier than a season finale cliffhanger. Also i can't say all the bible stories (even if this is a bible) so here are all the ones that i missed so if you know read
Patriarchs and Genesis Stories