Deadly Love

Trust the process

Nell is going away for two weeks and wants me prepared for her return to fuck. She kisses me and I have to think chest box so fast that she does get a tint of how I truly taste. "Mm, I can't wait to come back to whatever that was." I stare at her and just fucking smile when I hear a deep growl come through. "Over my fucking dead body," Damina says in the distance. How did he hear what she said? Yessica walks her or the door and when she comes back in she falls to her knees. Guards rush help her up and take her away. I don't know if I'm supposed to follow her or wait. Five minutes go by when a guard tells me to get in the rink and start killing people faster. The next ten are easy they don't even put up a fight. The next day I take on 12 and the next three days I have killed 42 and I have four more people to go. My soul is jam-packed with people and I have stopped eating. I can't sleep and my body won't relax. I am not okay and my dad holds my hair every night well I heaved from nightmares or simply because the thought of me killing those people and how easy it has become makes me sick to my stomach.

My dad has finally figured out that Nell wasn't this bad before. She really did love Yessica and even tried to bring her a family. She kept trying to get her pregnant. But now guy could get her pregnant. Nell blamed Yessica and said it was her fault they couldn't have babies. She went to the holy gates and asked what was wrong with her. No one would answer her. She finally received a visit from Luciel and she told her that she couldn't have a baby because whatever Nell was doing to her well Nell and her were having sex with a guy was the actual reason she couldn't get pregnant. Yessica said she was a liar and before she was thinking she smacked Luciel in the head with a metal statue and she started to bleed out. She was going to take Luciel's body and bury it before Nell would come back home but she came home early that day and ate her best friend's soul in front of her. Nell told Yessica this is why we cannot truly trust people we can only trust each other. For a long time, Yessica believed in Nell until she started to hurt Yessica. It was small things at first but then she became brutal when she would make Yessica bleed. From the other night, she does more than make her bleed she physically hurts her for her pleasure only. She doesn't love Yessica she wants them around because she doesn't want to lose her power. Yessica isn't only a soul sucker she is a fallen angel which means she holds more powers than the other soul suckers. She has access to god. I'm still confused as to why she truly wants access to them.

Yessica comes in clapping her hands and says, "Okay time to kiss two more people." Her face changes when she sees how I'm looking and she gets angry. "You can't give up I need you to kill these people Nubia. I need you to fucking trust me and kill them for me. For our love. For Nell and yourself. You need to get the fuck up and stop being a crybaby bitch." My soul wants to cry but I am fucking over it. I get up to go kill these two more souls and I just want to get it over with and come back up here and sleep. Damian is even trying to get through and I just keep telling him I can't. He keeps telling me sweet things but it's just not worth it anymore I don't want to live this life no more. I don't want to be okay with murdering people anymore. Yessica shoves me through the door and down to the rink and I just want to fucking swing around and kill her. Because she is a fucking liar this isn't for love this is for her own sick fucking game. For her pleasure. She deserves to die and I want to make sure I get to fucking watch. When I go in to kill the next two they are young kids. No, they are teenagers. I look at Yessica and she throws me the blade. "Fuck no. I'm not doing this. I'll let them kiss me." My voice shakes at the fact that she wants me to kill kids of all things. Fuck no. Then there is a sting and then a pain from my right side. One of those little shots shot me with a bow. And the. The other comes out of nowhere and stabs a blade into my right shoulder. They get close enough to my ear, "We get to choose what happens to us and we choose that you take our lives so we can fucking kill these assholes. We have to kill these assholes." she yells at me, and without thinking I push the blade through her heart. The boy charges me and I slice his head off. I pull the blade out break the bow and pull the wood out. I limp out of the room and Yessica is in my face. "Yessica you need to get the fuck out of my face before I hurt you worse than Nell does and it's not going to be for pleaser it's going to be out of anger and how disgusted I am with you." I see tears start to form in her eyes. I am so angry that I keep going. "I don't want to see your pathetic, ugly ass sou sucking face till Nell gets back. You are fucking worthless. You just fucking let her step all over you." I'm yelling at her now and I'm going off or maybe I'm trying to make her see something. "You letting her fucking be little you and act like your disposable. It is fucking sickening. You keep going down this road she will eventually take your soul because you are fucking stronger than her. She isn't going to ever fucking love you. I don't love you. I love someone else with my whole heart and I can't even be with them because I am so busy trying to save you from yourself and I am the only one that is getting g shitted on." I'm sure I made little sense to know and now I know that I am madly in love with Damian and if we survive this I'm totally marrying that boy. She looks at me and I just brush past her. I honestly don't want to hurt her and I didn't even want to mentally hurt her. I just don't my soul is down. I am mentally and physically done. I have no say in my life anymore. Everyone is going to keep owning it and telling me what to do. When I come through the door to my room my father is waiting there to tell me something but I collapse into the room and my body correction my soul just falls apart. I don't cry out loud I don't let him see my pain. I am completely blank. The rise of my chest and the beating of my heart slow as I completely let myself slip away into nothing because I don't think I can hold onto any of this anymore.