29 | first and last christmas

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29 ☆ ( "I WAS HAPPY

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29( "I WAS HAPPY." )

Christmas was right around the corner

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Christmas was right around the corner. I returned home for the holidays as I said, and the consequences were that Mother just told me "Welcome home." Father hugged me and told me to stay even after winter break ended, but I couldn't make that promise. My birthday was right around the corner, and I would return under Teacher Fujii's care once the break ended.

This year, I wanted to celebrate with everyone–they were going to go out tonight, but Mother forced me to stay home on Christmas Eve. She said if I behaved myself, I would have a chance to go out with them for Christmas, but not for long. Well, I suppose I'll suppress my true feelings, just this once because I've already rebelled by living away from them.

"Sato," I stared at my lovely dragon-eyed fish. She swam around, tail and gills in full motion. I poked her glass bowl, giving her for Christmas a bigger home, so now, she can swim from my fingers to my elbow. She stared at me momentarily, waiting for me to continue my words. "Do you feel alone in your tank?"

She continued staring. I think that's a no. Gosh, she's just like me. "I guess I'm the best company you can get, huh?" I chuckled, leaving my finger on the glass. She floated up to it and touched her face against the glass, making me smile even more. "Promise you won't leave me, okay? When you're gone, then I'll become your reincarnate–you're the only reason that I'm still in contact with your father."

That makes me sound like my Mother. Sato must've caught that too, because she swam to the other side of the fish bowl. "I promise, Sato. I think I do have feelings for your father, they're just not as intense," I whispered to her. "Or really, I don't understand love. Mother and Father were never in love, so I can't find what it means to feel it. I'm sorry that if your parents were to split, you wouldn't be able to choose custody. I'm sorry that I don't love your father like I initially thought I did. It's all my fault."

Sato's tail waved back and forth at me. I chuckled, realizing something. "God, Sato. I just realized I was saying all the things to you that I wish Mother could admit to me," Sato turned around, propelling herself toward me once again. "I guess she was right in August–we are exact replicas of each other. I never thought nightmares could come true, but I guess they do."

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