The Sweet Steve Series

Sweet Steve and the Heat Wave

Summer is hard. As a cat, I spend my days lounging where I please, whether it be on my Grandmother's bed or at the tippy top of the cat tree. Sometimes I take a break from napping to throw all of the toys out of the hiding spot in the cat tree and at the other cats and dogs just to remind them that I'm the cutest little boss.

I was but a tiny kitten during my first summer outside, and I don't remember much about it, but I do remember last summer. It was the first one in my new home. The days were just warm enough to bask in the sun on my screened in porch, and the nights cool enough to race around the house and cause a ruckus at three a.m. without breaking a sweat.

That is not my experience this summer. This summer is hot and sticky and I feel like I'm melting into a tiny puddle of orange. We do not have a thing called whole house air conditioning, so I've tried sleeping in the rooms with air conditioners, but it is not for me. They are loud, they are weird shaped, and they displease me in general.

No, I want to sleep on my porch, but I am not allowed. I'm told that it's too hot and I'll get sick, but I am a strong, independent kitty and I know what is best for me. Sometimes pawrents are so unfair! Instead, I slink into Grandmother's bedroom and take up a place on the bed. She comes in after me and turns on the fan to make sure that I get a gentle breeze. Eventually, other kitties come to join me, and before I know it I'm stuck in a warm puddle of kitties and no privacy whatsoever.

I do not understand why this summer is so warm, or who I can write a complaint letter to in order to get it fixed. I became so cranky, in fact, that I did something that was very out of character for me and Mother says was very stinky.

She was minding her own business, sitting on the couch and watching TV, just trying to survive the heat wave. This meant that she wasn't paying attention to me. Me, The Orange. I came up behind her and sat on the top of the couch, but she didn't know that I was there. Honestly, that's kind of rude of her not to notice me. I sat right against her head, but she told me later that she thought the pillow fell down against her.

Not getting the attention that I deserved, I pulled her ponytail. It was just hanging there looking so lonely, so I thought I would give it some attention. Startled, she turned quickly to see what happened. She told me that I was a bad boy, but she was also laughing, so I knew that I had gotten away with it because she loves me.

I got lots of pets after that, even on my belly, and she told me that she'd forgive me because it was so hot and it makes all of us a little cranky. She did not give me my favorite treat, a freeze dried minnow, for not stealing her ponytail holder, but I accepted that she didn't ground me and that was good enough. I'm not sure how she would ground me anyway, because I'm a kitty and we kitties believe that we are the leaders and humans are our peasants.

Heat wave or no heat wave, I learned my lesson. I do not want to be a bad boy, not really. I want to be the bestest boy in all the land. Now, if I want Mother's attention, I flop down next to her on the couch and poke her leg with my paw until she pets me. Usually she notices me before I have to deploy the claws.

I know another heat wave is coming, so I'm brushing up on all the rules of the heat wave and ways to keep cool. Mother said she has bought us a cooling mat to lay on, whatever that is. It's round and green and it has a funny texture to it. I like to slide across it, but maybe when it gets hot out again, I will give it a try.