Evermore - Cheradine

Chapter 14

I arrived at the hotel utterly devastated. I hadn't expected things to end like this. The night had begun with so many promises and high hopes, only to collapse into misunderstandings and distance. I knew I'd hurt Cheryl, but she hadn't even given me a chance to explain. If she'd just listened, she'd understand that what happened with Dave meant nothing, worse than nothing, really. It was a bad experience, one I deeply regretted and was ashamed of.

I knew I shouldn't have done it, and looking back, I don't even know why I did. I thought if I enjoyed being with Dave, I'd get over the Geordie, but it completely backfired. If anything, it made me want her more, crave her more, and, unfortunately, fall even deeper for her. There was no denying it, I was falling for her, no matter how hard I tried to stop it. But how could I, with someone so captivating and addictive?

That night, apart from the ending, had been perfect. I'd seen many sides of Cheryl: the friend, the bandmate, even the less friendly side. But the loving side was something I'd only heard about. Experiencing a romance with her was a whole new experience, and I was completely fascinated and smitten.

I was worried that what happened with Dave would come out someday, and honestly, I planned to keep it from her. I just wanted to avoid drama and her getting the wrong idea. But when she looked into my eyes and asked me that bloody question, I couldn't lie. I wanted to start a relationship with her, and I couldn't do that with lies, it wouldn't be right.

As I collapsed onto the hotel bed, I couldn't hold back the tears any longer. They streamed down my face, soaking into the pillow. I buried my face into it, trying to muffle the sounds of my sobs. My mind replayed the events of the evening, over and over, like a torturous loop. Each time I replayed it, I wished for a different outcome, but reality was relentless.

I couldn't be bothered to change, I just couldn't believe I'd messed everything up. I could still smell her on me. We'd been so close all night, wrapped up in each other, that her smell was all over my skin. I focused on the soothing sensation of inhaling her perfume, feeling as though I was breathing her in. The smell offered some comfort, and eventually, I managed to drift off to sleep.

When I woke up, the memories of the previous night came rushing back like a tidal wave. It felt more like a dream than reality, and I could only convince myself it had actually happened when I passed my arm over my nose to catch her scent. She was still there.

Nicola called me, inviting me out for breakfast. I wasn't in the mood to go out and act like nothing had happened, as if my world hadn't crumbled overnight. However, I didn't want the redhead to think I wanted to isolate myself. Besides, now that Cheryl and Kimberley were staying afar, it was obvious Nicola would lean on me more for company.

Before heading out for breakfast, I tried calling Cheryl, but it went straight to voicemail. She was clearly avoiding me. I tried again, just to make sure her phone wasn't out of reach and she hadn't had a chance to pick up, but it went to voicemail once more. The rejection stung, and I felt a knot of anxiety tighten in my chest. I wanted to explain, to fix things, but she was shutting me out completely.

I joined Nicola in the hotel lobby, trying to mask my turmoil with a smile. We walked to a nearby café, and as we sat by the window, she immediately noticed my puffy eyes and the sadness I couldn't quite hide.

"Another bad night of sleep?" Nicola asked, giving me a sympathetic look.

Apparently, I was becoming known for my poor nights' sleep. Now, whenever she saw me looking rough in the morning, she immediately associated it with it.

I forced a small smile. "Yeah, you could say that."

"You might want to check that once the tour is over," she suggested gently