A blast from the past(Hyunlix)

14.

FELIX

"Jinnie wake up honey" I woke him up and he groaned before curling himself in his blankets. Yep, he was definitely big and didn't want to go to school.

"I don't have a lesson today hyung" he peeped through the blankets." Are you sure? Let me see your schedule" I said. It's not like I didn't trust him or something but I wanted to make sure.

He took out his phone and showed me his schedule and indeed he had no lesson." Okay then go take a shower and come down for breakfast" I told him and he nodded.

After half an hour he came down wearing some shorts and a shirt showcasing his beautiful legs. He sat down and started playing with his phone instead of eating.

" Can you start eating munchkin?" I pushed his plate towards him." I will hyung. You're disturbing me" he said in a very spiteful tone. Someone clearly had woken up on the left side of the bed.

"Hwang Hyunjin come here." I said sternly yet softly. He placed his phone on the table and waddled over to me." I'm sorry hyung" he said even before I said anything.

"I don't expect this from you Hyunjin. I know your behavior isn't like this. What's wrong?" I asked him gently. He shook his head while looking down." How about we try this again? What's wrong?" I asked.

"It's..... I just....I don't think I can do this" he said." What are you talking about pumpkin?" I patted my lap and he sat down." Hyung you can never fix me. It's hard watching you try knowing that you can't succeed" he said sadly.

"You're a very good person and I like you that's why I'm telling you while it's still early. You can find a better little than me a-and...." he started before he got overwhelmed by his emotions and cried softly.

I soothed him until he calmed down. I sighed deeply making him to look at me." Honey, I don't want a better little or someone who's not broken. I just want you. Hwang Hyunjin" he looked at me with shock but nodded nonetheless with a bright red face.

"C-can you feed me?" he said his voice just above a whisper. I nodded and he took his food and settled on my lap again. He gave me the food indicating that he wanted me to feed him and I nodded. I started feeding him and he started speaking out of nowhere.

"He always punished me but didn't give me any aftercare" he played with the hem of my shirt. My movements stilled and my heart broke into pieces. I might have spent a minutes keeping quiet just trying to get through my shock.

What in the flipping hell had the man done to my baby? Not giving aftercare to a little was simply destroying their whole existence. They always need assurance even in the big headspace now why would you not offer aftercare after punishment.

I could feel his tears dampening my tee." Shh...it's okay honey, you don't need to say anything more. You're my brave boy and you did so good by overcoming" I rubbed circles on his back.

"B-But I wanna tell you" he said as I wiped his tears. He took my hand and started playing with it before taking a deep breath." I was never allowed to eat, sleep or talk to anyone without his permission" he said.

I was about to say something when he continued." Everytime I got into little space he would lock me in the room and I had to force myself out of it" he continued this time with no tears in his eyes.

"He just gave me rules without asking me if I was comfortable with them and not following them would lead to punishment" he said as a lone tear fell from his eyes.

I felt my eyes watering too because there was absolutely nothing I could do to relieve him of the pain or to erase the memories that he had.

I hugged him tightly as it was the only solace I could offer. Even my vocabulary had blanked out due to the information I'd just received.

"He never bought me any little stuff and didn't allow me to buy one for myself either...because it was childish" he chuckled bitterly.

"It's okay honey. You don't have to tell me everything. I'm proud of you for surviving through it all and for opening up" I said to him and he shook his head before detaching himself from me.

"I always had to do what he wanted to be a good boy. I had to wear baggy clothes because he couldn't protect me from the perverts he called his friends" he continued and my stomach churned.

"Good boys pay their bills. Good boys do what they're told. Good boys don't get little in public. Good boys don't safe word. Good boys don't wear revealing clothes. That's what he believed and exercised" he said and I could feel myself literally about to puke.

"That's not true pumpkin. It's utter rubbish and I promise that I'll love you and take care of you until you realize that you've been a good boy all along" I said to him and he nodded.

"How about we stop talking about all these painful memories and tell me what my baby wants" he smiled with bloodshot eyes.

"Hyung I'm big" he whined and I chuckled." So what? You're still my baby. Still my adorable Jinnie." I kissed his nose and he bit his lip shyly as he played with his fingers.

"You look so cute when you're flustered" I whispered to him and he got flustered even more. He put his red face in the crook of my neck and touched my chest lightly. My cute baby boy.

"How about we go for a lunch date tomorrow darling?" I asked and he nodded on my chest." Last time I checked my baby boy didn't answer like that" I said and he looked at me.

"Hyungie" he said in his cute voice and my heart skipped a bit. I liked him so much and I always wanted to protect him from this cruel world.

"Yes baby" my voice came as a whisper and he shook his head. I caressed his lower lip and his grip on my chest tightened probably needing the feeling of our lips together as much as I did.

I slowly leaned in and rubbed our noses together before touching our foreheads together." Cupcake?" I called him and he licked his lips looking down.

"Daddy" he looked at me. Had he just called me daddy in his big headspace? Damn I must be one lucky guy in the whole world. I pecked his lips before taking his lower lip into my mouth.

I kissed him passionately exploring his sweet lips and he rendered the control and allowed me to take the lead. His hands locked on my nape and he played with my hair.

He let out a soft whimper when I caressed his inner thighs and I decided to stop before we went any further. We stopped the kiss and I pecked his now swollen lips before softly kissing his forehead.

My baby placed his head on my chest and played with the buttons of my golf t-shirt." I like you so much pumpkin and never let anyone tell you otherwise" I said and he nodded.

"I like you too hyung" he whispered and kissed my cheek. Adorable." Honey" I called him." Daddy," he whined because I'd just woken him up from his beauty sleep.

How did he even sleep that fast? He was such a sleepyhead and I liked it. I kissed his forehead as an apology." I'm sorry buttercup. Sleep babydoll" I whispered and he nodded.

"I like you daddy" he whispered before completely drifting off to sleep.  Wholesome. Completely wholesome. I would never want any other little after meeting Hyunjin

He was just tailor made for me. So so perfect for me and the way he fit into my arms like he had always belonged there. With him I was content. Content wasn't even enough to describe how I felt.

To be continued