like I can never be the one you desired like I am dumb
I try so much to be as you wanted me to be to be smart to be intelligent active smiling to do things you like
I try so hard that sometimes I feel like dying suffocating tormenting
trying to be someone who I am not, so that you recognize me feel happy when you talk to someone about me be proud of me
I don't even know how to share my distress, pain, and anguish. Unknowingly you have become my worst nightmare, the reason for my agony, trauma, and anxiety.
Still, I can't help but understand you, and feel that whatever you are making me go through is to make me a perfect human being. Because at the end of the day, everyone likes someone who is
PERFECT.
At last, everybody values your certificates, not your knowledge, values your appearance, not your character at first sight. Values your doing, not your intentions.
I am tired of trying, But I will still keep trying. because your validation became my life goal. I can't think of any achievement other than that.
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