Only Yours (PrapaiSky fanfic)

Chapter 11 - Date

Sky's POV

When Prapai left, I felt a mix of relief and panic. It was like I couldn't control myself properly around him. Like I was starving for human touch, and I had all this feeling that was eating me alive.

I liked him. We had gone too far for me to not admit that. I had done the one thing I said I would never do again: fall in love. It's probably too soon for love, and I don't even know if it really is love; maybe I just spent too much time alone... I'm lying to myself. I know it isn't love yet. Right now, it's just feelings that can evolve into something more.

He isn't him; he isn't them. He's a giant teddy bear that has a lot of money and a lot of power. That's right. It's alright, and I wanted this; I wanted to give him a chance. He said he would melt my cold heart, that he would show me what love really is, and I want that, but... do I even deserve it?

What if he finds out and is disgusted with me? But why would he find out? I wouldn't tell me; that is a secret I would take to the grave.

I get up as I feel all my body tension up. I prefer not to dwell on the past. I've moved on from that life; I have, and I know I don't owe anything to anyone. I'm free.

I look around my apartment; it seems so empty now that it's just me. My shoulders are rather cold too. I see, and I go to bed. It's late; there's no point in staying up. I need to get some rest for tomorrow and get ready for the bunch of work I'll have to do during the week.

I go to sleep; I look at the ceiling; I don't see anything; it's dark, but I don't want to have nightmares. I just want a good night of sleep. For a moment I thought it would be possible, but then I woke up and it was 4 a.m. and I needed to sleep, and I couldn't get back to it.

I get up and take a shower. I prepare my breakfast and eat slowly; after all, I have time. I revise a bunch of topics, and after that, I feel a wave of dormancy hit me. If I could, I would go back to sleep now, but I can't; I need to go to university.

Everyone asks me if I'm okay; it's sweet that they worry, but at the same time, I just wanted to get through the day. I appreciate everyone's concern, but I also want to just forget that I couldn't participate in something I worked so hard on.

"Sky." I hear Rain call me. We're supposed to get lunch together; at least that's what he told me. In reality, he wants to make sure I eat and don't skip meals. "Are you really okay? Did P'Pai behave? Do I need to kick his but? Or, are you two onto something? If you know what I mean..."

"I'm okay; I don't feel sick anymore. He did. You don't, and it's none of your business." I say as we walk to the canteen.

"But Sky... I tell you everything about me and P'Venice."

"You didn't at first. Or are you forgetting that time I caught you two in the cinema?"

"Okay, but I thought our friendship had evolved since then," he says, making puppy eyes.

"That doesn't work with me. Let's just eat." I say

Rain spent the rest of the day nudging me for something about me and P'Pai. I did not talk about it. I didn't want to talk about it as a way of not jinxing it. It seems stupid, I know, but it makes me feel less stressed in a way.

When it's time to go home, I see a fancy car and then P'Pai coming out of it. I smile as I go in his direction.

"Hey!" he says sweetly. "How was your day?"

"It was good." I say, and he drives me home.

We don't talk much during the trip. We just listen to the music and rest a little because we are both tired after such a long day.