Hate is Love

Chapter 4: The Past

Namcha sat down heavily in his office, the weight of the past pressing down on him. The maps and plans spread across his desk blurred as memories flooded back, taking him to a time when life was simpler, when he and Thyme had been inseparable.

They had met in elementary school. Namcha was the shy, chubby kid who often got picked on, while Thyme was the confident, outgoing boy who stood up for him. Their friendship had blossomed quickly. They shared everything—from their lunches to their dreams. Thyme had always been protective of Namcha, a guardian and a friend.

Namcha smiled faintly, recalling one particular memory. They had been ten years old, and a group of older boys had been teasing Namcha about his weight. Thyme had marched right up to them, fists clenched, and declared, "Leave him alone, or you'll have to deal with me!" The boys had backed off, and from that day on, Namcha had looked up to Thyme as his hero.

As they grew older, their bond deepened. They spent countless hours together, exploring the woods behind their neighborhood, building forts, and sharing their hopes and fears. Thyme had always been there for Namcha, offering support and encouragement. Namcha, in turn, had admired Thyme's strength and determination.

But life, as it often does, took them in different directions. High school brought new challenges and new friends. Thyme got involved with a group of older boys who were on the fringes of the underworld. Namcha, eager to stay close to his friend and prove his own worth, followed. What started as petty thefts and minor mischief gradually escalated into more serious crimes. Before they knew it, they were entrenched in the world of gangs and rivalries.

The transition had been gradual but inevitable. They found themselves on opposite sides of a growing divide, with Thyme rising through the ranks of Alpha and Namcha doing the same in Beta. Their childhood bond was strained, then severed, by the demands of loyalty and survival in the underworld.

Namcha often thought about those days, wondering how things might have been different. He had buried his feelings for Thyme deep within, convinced that their friendship, and any hope of something more, was a thing of the past. It was easier to focus on the present, on the rivalry that defined their lives.

But Thyme's confession had stirred something in him that he couldn't ignore.

Namcha leaned back in his chair, his eyes drifting to the framed photo on his desk. It was a picture of the two of them, taken at a summer camp when they were twelve. They were grinning widely, arms slung around each other's shoulders, carefree and happy. Namcha felt a pang of longing for those simpler times.

The knock on his door startled him out of his reverie. Rachel poked her head in, her expression curious.

"Hey, you okay? You've been in here for a while."

Namcha nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah, just thinking."

Rachel stepped inside, closing the door behind her. "Thinking about Thyme?"

Namcha sighed, not surprised that she had guessed. "It's complicated."

"Love always is," Rachel said, taking a seat across from him. "But you need to figure out what you want. Thyme laid his heart out for you. Are you really going to just ignore that?"

Namcha ran a hand through his hair, feeling the weight of Rachel's words. "It's not that simple, Rachel. We've been enemies for so long. There's so much history, so much pain."

"But there's also love," Rachel pointed out gently. "You can't deny that. And you can't keep hiding from it."

Namcha looked at her, seeing the concern in her eyes. "I don't know if I can do this. What if it doesn't work out? What if it makes things worse?"

Rachel reached across the desk, taking his hand. "That's a risk with any relationship. But sometimes, you have to take a leap of faith. You've spent so long protecting yourself, but maybe it's time to let someone in."

Namcha felt a lump form in his throat. "I don't know if I'm ready."

Rachel squeezed his hand. "No one ever is. But if you don't try, you'll always wonder what could have been."

After Rachel left, Namcha sat in silence, contemplating her words. He knew she was right. He couldn't keep running from his feelings. He had to confront them, no matter how terrifying that prospect was.

That night, Namcha lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Sleep eluded him as his mind replayed the moments of his childhood, the bond he shared with Thyme, and the heart-wrenching confession Thyme had made.

He remembered the nights they had spent camping in the woods, staring up at the stars, talking about their dreams and fears. Thyme had always been there for him, a constant in his life. But as they grew older, the pressures of their world had forced them apart.

Namcha wondered if there was a way back, a way to reclaim what they had lost. He had always loved Thyme, even when they were on opposite sides. But admitting that, especially now, was daunting.

The next morning, Namcha made a decision. He couldn't let fear dictate his life. He needed to talk to Thyme, to see if there was still a chance for them. It wouldn't be easy, but he owed it to himself, and to Thyme, to try.

As he prepared to leave for Alpha's headquarters, Namcha took one last look at the photo on his desk. The faces staring back at him were young and full of hope. He wanted to believe that they could find that hope again.

With a deep breath, Namcha stepped out of his office and headed towards the future he hoped they could build together.