To Rhial

5

Vetia

Brenden's stupid blue eyes stupidly stared at me like I was stupid. "It sounds like a bad D&D name."

"Fuck you, ET. I'm gonna be real, I panicked and my gamertag was the first thing that came to mind. So I said it like a vampire and WetYaBed420 became Vetia. It was a joke. You're the one who decided to start calling me Vetia."

Brenden conceded to not caring anymore. "Well it's stupid."

I smirked. "Okay, whatever you say Megamind. Do you want me to choose some basic bitch name like Chloe or Ehmaleigh? I ain't using my old name, that'd just be disrespecting my old body callin' this bitch Rowan. It's a fantasy world, I don't give a shit. I'm just tryna have fun with what I got."

Desmond countered. "I kinda get it, but how do you know this is like other fantasy places?"

I pointed at Adam the orc and Brenden the elf.

"Fair enough." He turned to Tells to whisper a joke.

Adam chuckled. "All of us look like some 14 year-old's self-inserts except Brenden. He's the joke character with stupidly big ears and eyes." That really struck a nerve in alien Brenden.

I trudged out of the grass and plopped down across from the three of them. "I'm kinda pissed, but it ain't that bad, all things considered. Can we just try to have a little fun with this? I get that you're in a constant state of bitching and moaning, but maybe now you don't have to be. Try to think of it like we're actually in a fantasy world, cause, ya know, we are. Hell, if anyone should be mad, it's Tells and I! We gotta learn new bodily functions! I don't know when my pussy's gonna start bleeding but I know it's gonna scare the shit outta me!" He stared me dead in the eyes like he was getting pissed off again, so I lightened my tone. "You're that mad about a little joke? Really?! I get that this isn't an ideal situation, but who pissed in your Wheaties, Brenden?"

"Pissed in my Wheaties? Bitch, we straight up died today! I think that's plenty piss-enough for my Wheaties! I don't care about the fucking prank! You're gonna carry that name like a seal of stupidity now for all I care! But dude, we fucking died today!" Brenden stood up and everyone went silent. "Is it cool and fun that we all died in a car accident, then woke up in completely new bodies, only to almost get trampled to death by a fucking wooly mammoth in the middle of nowhere?! I want to figure out what the fuck is going on. I didn't ask to be put into this body and I'm sure none of you all were either, but I want to know what is going on!" He paused, looking over all of us, who could only respond with silence. "What the fuck happened to you guys and why are you acting like everything is okay?! Has it just been your dream to brutally die and then get sent to Hell because of all your shitty Chinese cartoons?! Because that's what it's looking like! Why do I sound like the delusional one for not being happy and giddy that we all died 'n shit?! Have you all forgotten that we had families and lives back there?"

I'll shut up. I don't feel like arguing with him.

Desmond put out his hand. "Hold up, lemme be clear, I don't watch that gay shit, I'm just having fun. But Brenden, be honest, what the fuck are we gonna do about it? We can sulk or we can move on and try to be happy about it. I had it really good. Really fucking good. Do you honestly think I'm happy about losing everything? No. I'm really not. But what am I gonna do about it now?"

Adam sat down next to me. "You may not have wanted this, but I hated life back home. Working and saving money, only to not be able to afford anything I actually want? Fuckin' sucked. If you'd have told me I'd get a fresh start by killing myself, then I'd have been the first self-abortion. But we're all here because of an accident. Not because we wanted to be."