CUT INTO MY HEART LIKE PAPER -lhs💕

04

CRUSH - ZEROBASEONE

"deo apado neoleul hyanghae crush..." (even if it hurts, on you my crush...)

it was the next day, the day lee heeseung would ask out choi ahrin to be his prom date.

[AHRIN]
i was at the cafeteria, sitting at my table with wonyoung and liz today.
i then saw heeseung walk in with a bouquet of flowers and a shy face, waving to his friends as they gave him a nod in weird unison.

i wonder who he's thinking of. it was prom week after all. his gaze from afar darts to me, as a smile is on his face. i can't tell if i find him endearing in this moment, or slap material.

he walks over to my table, and awkwardly stands in front of me.

"Hey..." he mumbled, looking down on the ground.

um what.

[HEESEUNG]
my heart pounds as i walk in front of her. oh my god im asking out my very own enemy, she has a colder heart, yet im going to try anyway...

"Hey..." i mumble, mentally cursing myself as it came out too cowardly, especially when i look at the ground below me.

i feel a sense of fear as i see ahrin turn to me with a look of possible disgust or discomfort. oh my god, am i looking like a fool?!
i look back up at her and clear my throat. i extend my arm out, holding a bouquet of orchids.

you've got this, lee heeseung. come on. the worst she can say is no.

"Ahrin, could you possibly... no-" i cut off, trying to word myself right, feeling red spread across my face as i mess up, ahrin giving me a weird glance. i take a deep breath and start again.

"Ahrin, will you be willing to be my prom date?" i ask, wanting it to be over quickly, feeling embarrassment inside of me.

[AHRIN]
the fuck did he just say to me...? uhm.

i look at wonyoung and liz, wonyoung looking away with a frown, liz looking back at me with hope in her eyes.

"Uh... no, let me think." i say, coming off pretty harsh so far.

[HEESEUNG]
once i heard a 'no', my heart sank. it felt a little hurtful to me. i shift my gaze down slowly. im worried about what she's thinking. it felt like she sort of rejected me for a few seconds. i look back up at her, looking at her whisper to her friend liz, as her friend wonyoung looked away.

is it me, or do i feel like wonyoung has been weird to ahrin whenever im around...?

[AHRIN]
i know this might be cruel... but i've been only wanting to attend prom just to win the prom duo. he seems in love with me. and heeseung is my enemy, i'll just go with him for the winning. i know it seems pretty selfish, but my reason is that i'd rather not be in love.

"Um... yeah. don't get the wrong idea though, im mostly going with you to get a chance to win the prom duo." i reply, feeling barely guilty at my words. his expression drops, although i don't really care.

liz looked at me with a disappointed look, shaking her head at me.

[HEESEUNG]
my expression dropped, my heart sinking again. i feel like tearing up, holding it back as i don't want to humiliate myself even more in front of the cafeteria. i feel my friend's eyes on me from afar.

...she doesn't like me back.

hearing she'd only go with me just for the sake of her winning, hearing she didn't like me back or anything else, practically using me as her winning tool.

it cut into my heart like paper...

i looked back up at her. nodding, holding back my tears.

"i understand." i force it out of me.

"see you at prom, ahrin..." i mumbled with a shaky tone.

by the time i finally got back to my table with my circle of friends, who were awaiting and spectating from afar, i started breaking down into tears as i sat down, the bouquet still in my hand. i didn't even care that the petals of the orchids fell or slightly broke off or a few of the flowers itself falling out.

her words cut into my heart like the harshest knives.

tears streamed down my face. my friends read my expression and actions, all immediately comforting me as i explain what had happened and her words.

the entire lunch time, i didn't eat. instead, i simply cried.

Gosh.. why does it hurt so bad...?