Desired, but never loved.

Chapter 10

It's February 13th, and I'm in class. I don't know what's happening, but it's the worst day of the year so far. First, I twisted my ankle while running to catch my bus because I was late. Then, while entering class, my hand got stuck on some nails on the wall, and I tore the sleeve of my shirt. After that, I got into an argument with a guy in my class because we couldn't agree on the best font for our group project. To top it off, I was punished and had to stand outside for a period because I forgot my textbook. It's just 9 AM, and this is how my morning is going.

It's been 14 days since I last saw Erva, and 7 days since we talked. The past 15 days have been hectic. The day after Shraddha, Erva, and I met, Erva and I met again. She was collecting some documents near my school, so we decided to meet up. We talked a lot and shared our feelings about staying friends. I would never date Erva; it's just not happening.

She got her visa for the U.S., and her flight is on February 17th—just 3 days away.

"What's up? You're not having breakfast and not talking, It's unusual not coming from the babble queen." Irisha asked me. We were in the canteen for breakfast, but I don't have an appetite.

"Remember I went to Hyderabad for my uncle's marriage on the 5th? That day, Erva and I were talking about our feelings, and she said she wants more than friendship."

"I'm all ears," Irisha responded.

"And then, you know Navya and her mom also went with us. After that, I was just so happy. The wedding went well. That night, Navya and I were sharing a bed. Erva and I -umm were just talking—about relationships and stuff. We were just having a conversation about things I don't really understand."

"Okay. Let's get to the point, Ash. We only have 10 minutes left before classes start, and we're not in the same class."

"Then Shraddha texted me, saying, 'See, I probably don't know what Erva mentioned about her and me. I'm not taking you in a negative way, but as far as I know, the truth about her trying to make you fall for her is worse than you think. So don't overthink it. We broke up for a while but got back together shortly after, which Erva didn't mention, I guess. Because we tried to keep it private. IDK, but this is it. She was trying to hurt you, nothing else, which she clearly told me. That's all.'"

Irisha looked at me with horror. "And what did you reply?"

"It was 12:20, and luckily-luckily Navya woke up at the same time, like God was saving me. She read all the texts and replied, 'that would have been messed up, man.' And Shraddha replied, "I think it would be better if you knew her intentions."

And I replied with 'IK.' Just that. Then she said, 'You guys should talk first. IDK, I am not trying to be that third wheel to ruin things, but you should know what's happening to you. Girl, take care. Goodnight.' And I left it on seen."

"I know there's something more. Spill it."

"That's it. I haven't talked to her since. I came back from Hyderabad, and you know I had one more wedding to attend. Erva called me, and Suvanah picked up the phone. Without hearing anything, she argued, 'My sister doesn't want to talk to you, so better not call her ever again.' You know how fierce my cousin sister is."

"It's good. She has your back. But do you think Erva was trying to hurt you? Shraddha is definitely trying to ruin your relationship with Erva."

"And there's one more thing," I said, noticing Irisha's eyebrows lift in curiosity. "What did you do?"

"When Shraddha was texting me, I was talking to Erva. I asked her if we could date, but she rejected me, saying, 'I don't want you to be mine for just a brief moment. I don't want anything temporary with you. If I have you, I want it to be forever.'

And I replied, 'I wanted to take things casually, and you were okay with it. Just yesterday, you wanted a relationship, and now you don't. Erva, you are certainly a two-faced person. We could have made it work if you wanted to, but you desire something without even trying. I don't want a serious relationship with someone who lives with their ex, shares the same bed, lives under the same roof, calls their ex's family their own, and plans to move abroad together. Wow, and you want something serious?'

She said things would change when she moves to the US and that she's going to cut everyone off, but do I trust her? No. I was just a pawn in their game. We argued a lot, and in the end, I said, 'Shraddha got what she wanted. She won. Please her. I don't care about who you are or what I feel, so do not contact me ever again. Have a safe flight. I hope we never cross paths again.' That's it. I didn't block her, and she didn't text me. If I had my phone here, I would show you the texts."

That's it, there's nothing more. Everyone is disappointed in Erva. She actually broke my heart. I know it was too soon, but she did. Maybe she had her reasons, but she can't play with my mind. It's already been a long morning. I just want to go home and sleep. Nothing more.

Classes are finally over. I got on my school bus, wanting nothing more than to sleep. I laid my head against the window and closed my eyes. I didn't have the energy to talk to anyone. I heard my name being called, but I didn't want to open my eyes. I don't care; I am not talking to anyone.

Someone poked me on my left shoulder. I still didn't want to open my eyes or talk. There was another poke on my shoulder. Damn, who's here to disturb my peace?

I opened my eyes. My eyes met brown eyes under her helmet. Damn, I looked outside the window. Would I fit if I jumped out of this bus? Of course not. Panic rose in my throat..

"Hi," Erva Asel Khan stood in front of me, helmet on. What in the world is this? I gave a nervous smile. She picked up my bag and said,

"Let's go, I don't have much time."

~