Whispers of the Diamond: A Romance of Memory and Desire

Chapter 10 - Terra

My heart physically hurt as I sat in the damp, cold underground room. This was our headquarters, about two miles beneath the surface of the London District. I couldn't believe I'd gotten Alex killed. I was thankful for the extraction, but it didn't need to be so senseless; they could have done it without killing Alex. They were better trained than that.

"Sixty-two," I muttered before moving to join Joseph, who was busy programming the next part of our plan—an injection matrix that would give us the ability to override anything we needed on the next mission. These matrices were handy to have.

"You okay, Ter?" he asked.

"Yeah... just..." I paused. "Nothing, it doesn't matter. Have you got the blueprints for the Skyfield Factory?"

Skyfield was a construction plant; most of the military's gear came from there, and we intended to cripple it and them. Without their supplies, it would slow their ability to control the lowlands, and in doing so, we could organise a revolution and make the world just a little fairer.

"They're here," he said, passing me the blueprints as we began going over them, organising the operation. During the next phase, he would compartmentalise the information and ensure no one person had all the details—except for him, who would run the whole operation from back here at Headquarters.

"Still bothered, huh?" he asked as the militia folk filed out for "training" in the tunnels. Joseph sat at my side and took my hand, his cool grey eyes meeting mine, I always felt peace when Joseph took on the role of reassurance.

"He's the enemy now," he said softly. My heart twisted; he had made sure I was sent to prison, had stood between me and that psycho Abigail, ensuring I dealt with him. He had done everything I expected him to do to protect someone he cared about—just a glimmer of my Alex, the man I loved.

"He didn't deserve to die..." I replied, my emotions catching in the back of my throat, a hint of tears threatening to spill.

"They will bring him back. He isn't actually dead, Terra. You know that, and this is what we have to fight for—the right to die on our terms," Joseph sighed softly, squeezing my hand.

"I just... I wasn't prepared for it to be him. You know, like, him of all people?" I let my emotions show for a second before biting them down. I knew the answer: he was the best at what he did. That's why him. They probably knew we had a connection; they used us both, and Alex was too damn stubborn to see it. I guess when he finds me again—and he will—I'll just have to show him or kill him, and this time make sure he stays dead. I'll take my Alex away from them.

I pointed out various places on the blueprints, and Joseph agreed. The meeting seemed to last for hours, and by the time I made my way to my room, we had a plan. However, I was emotionally and physically exhausted.

I hated what was going on. This war we were in was for what was right, but what was right and what was just, those were very different. I couldn't believe the things I'd done, nor what I'd become. But it was necessary. And now standing in my way was a man I loved, with every part of who I am. It was him who forged the woman I became. I fought for him.

I sighed, making my way to the living quarters and then through the rows of cots to my own, stashing my gear in my foot locker before crawling onto the cot, the blanket drawn up over me. I wouldn't sleep much tonight as I listened to the snippets of conversations of others.

"Lola was killed," said an older woman, maybe Miss Myers. I knew everyone in this place; I'd made a point of it. Miss Myers was our cook and helped nurse people.

"She got cocky; we all tried to help her," said a male voice, possibly Marco's. Marco was our doctor.

"We move on; we have to keep going," said Jessica Anderson, not someone to be trifled with. They were discussing a recent mission that had gone sideways. It happens, and it sucks every single damn time. Lola was a good fighter; she had taken down three assailants by herself before getting her neck broken. She'd saved her team, though, sacrificing herself to ensure they escaped.

I hated those losses, but for us, they were inevitable. We knew what we signed up for. We were at war with the a government who were simply taking power and hoarding money because they could. Poverty and disease reigned in the lowlands, children cold and starving, pregnant women left in the streets, girls so young that selling themselves was just to keep warm. The world I lived in was a waking nightmare.

At least for the moment, we were safe; this place was as hidden as it got. I sighed softly as my mind drifted back to the crash, the screech of metal as it bent and twisted. Alex had been fast enough to grab his weapon, but it didn't matter. Jakob had been faster, with shots to his chest. I had to wonder: Did they know who he was? And who had helped me escape? These were troubling questions, to say the least.

I closed my eyes and once again tried to clear my mind. I turned onto my side, then yanked the blanket up over my head. Seeing that hollow look in his eyes was going to haunt me for a while. And yes, Joseph might be right; they'd bring Alex back. His death was temporary, but that didn't stop the violent, gut-wrenching guilt in my stomach.

Tomorrow I had another mission to plan and I so desperately wanted to sleep. I sigjed amd trned over, another grumble as I tried to settle. My brain raced and again wandered into its own thoughts, this time it settled into a memory, one of Alex and myself.