Echoes of My Heart

Chapter 5

Snapping out of his daydream, his breaths coming in deep and fast and rapid, Xiao Yuan tried to steady himself. The cool morning air wrapped around him, grounding him in the present moment. He glanced back at Wei Qian, who remained focused on fishing, seemingly unaffected by their earlier exchange.

Some wants are like daydreams beyond one's reach. Living only in one's fantasies.

Xiao Yuan's heart ached with the weight of his unreciprocated affection, the realisation that his love might eternally remain concealed.

A wave of frustration washed over him, mixing with the bittersweet ache in his heart.

Everything in his being wanted to walk across to him and pull him in his arms. To reach down and clasp his lips to his Wei Qian's. Consequences be damned.

He silently chided himself for allowing his imagination to run wild, for entertaining the possibility of a future that seemed increasingly unattainable.

Wondering if he could, for once and all, put an end to this. These feelings.

However, despite his attempts to rein in his emotions, Xiao Yuan couldn't help but steal brief glances at his brother, savouring the sight of Wei Qian in his element, completely unaware of the turmoil he was causing in Xiao Yuan's heart.

Standing so elegantly, in the water, his back broad and strong, his veiny arm holding on to the fishing rod.

Suddenly, Wei Qian's fishing line suddenly tugged, breaking Xiao Yuan from his reverie. With a swift, practised motion, Wei Qian reeled in a glistening fish, its scales catching the sunlight in a dazzling display. Xiao Yuan watched, mesmerised by the ease and grace with which Wei Qian handled the catch.

Wei Qian walked back to the bank slowly threading his way through the stream.

"Xiao Yuan, look at all the fish I caught!" Wei Qian squatted in front of the small reservoir he had created with stones, placing the live fish inside. "Want to give it a go?"

Xiao Yuan quietly observed him, though his mind was too preoccupied with the thoughts pressing at the edge of his consciousness. The moment felt ripe with tension, a perfect opportunity to voice the feelings he had kept hidden for so long.

He couldn't keep it in him anymore. He wanted to tell his brother. He wanted to be out.

"Gē?" Xiao Yuan's voice was hesitant but determined. It was time to confront his fears. He suspected why his brother had brought him here, away from Xiao Lili. "Do you already know that I like guys?"

The question hung heavily in the air.

Wei Qian paused, his hands stilling over the reservoir as he looked away. The gentle ripple of the water was the only sound for a moment, stretching into what felt like an eternity.

Xiao Yuan could feel the change in current as Wei Qian heard him. It felt as if all the warmth was sucked away as Xiao Yuan uttered those words, bringing in a swift chilly wave over the place where he sat.

When Wei Qian finally turned to look at Xiao Yuan, his expression was unreadable, but there was a hard edge in his eyes. He stood up slowly, walking over to where Xiao Yuan sat, his movements deliberate and tense.

Xiao Yuan dreaded as he saw his brother coming closer to him. Wei Qian's expressions didn't look happy, or accepting.

"Do you know what you're talking about?" Wei Qian asked, his voice cold and stoic. "You like boys? Have you thought it through?"

The sharpness in Wei Qian's tone cut through Xiao Yuan like a knife, the coldness of his words striking at the heart of Xiao Yuan's deepest fears. But there was no turning back now. He swallowed hard, his mouth dry as he struggled to find his voice.