I don't know what to do.
I feel so lonely, truly alone.
I feel like everything is in my hands.
All at once.
I feel like they are using me.
How come I can see through them,
but they do not see me?
I feel disappointed by the people around me.
How come they don't realize their actions?
their mistakes?
How come they can't realize
that I'm hurting?
Does someone know me?
Does my close friends really know me?
Even my therapist ignores me.
How can I be sure someone is stretching their hands
for me to hold onto?
How can I accept hands without having the burden?
How can I hold a knot
when everything about me is heavy?
I'm afraid that if I got tied,
it will be thinner than a thread.
I am sabotaging myself
and all the relationships I am having.
What do I do with the casualties?
How can someone hold someone like me?
How can they know me,
when I, myself, do not know who I am?
I'm at my twenties.
Expecting that everything is figured.
I'm still bitter.
How I wasted time
How I fucked myself up.
I guess,
I'll be on my way.
I'm so sick of all my shit.
-xysaoirse-
