Breaking the Playbook [COMPLETED]

Chapter 32

LOLO'S POV

The office was a sanctuary of cold efficiency, the stark white walls and minimalistic furniture almost mocking the turmoil churning inside me. It was late afternoon, the sun casting a muted glow through the high windows, and I was hunched over my desk, a mountain of paperwork barely registering in my peripheral vision. My focus was fractured, a mirror of the chaos that had become my life.

The decision I had to make loomed over me like a dark cloud. I'd been wracked with sleepless nights, endless arguments with my father, and constant media scrutiny. Every time I tried to focus on my work, my mind drifted back to Brooks and the mess we were trapped in. It felt like living in a hurricane—nothing was stable, nothing was predictable.

My phone buzzed on the desk, breaking my reverie. It was a text from Brooks. The message was simple: "Can we talk tonight?" I stared at the screen, my heart clenching. Brooks and I had been dancing around this issue for weeks. We'd maintained the pretense of a break-up, but it was tearing us apart emotionally. I knew this conversation was coming, and I wasn't sure I was ready for it.

Taking a deep breath, I replied, "Yes. Let's meet after work." The decision to meet wasn't just about discussing our relationship; it was about confronting the reality of our situation. It felt like the last thread of sanity in a world that was rapidly unraveling.

When the workday ended, I gathered my things with mechanical efficiency, each movement a reflection of my inner numbness. The drive home was a blur, the familiar streets and passing cars fading into the background as my mind replayed every possible outcome of our impending conversation. I parked my car in the driveway, the house looming ahead like a fortress. Inside, my father's presence was palpable, and the tension almost suffocating. He was in his study, probably working late as usual. I passed by quietly, not wanting to disturb him.

In my room, I tried to prepare myself mentally for the evening ahead. The mirror reflected a tired, stressed version of myself, with eyes red-rimmed and expression hardened. I'd dressed casually, but I felt like I was dressing for battle. Every detail and every choice seemed to carry more weight than usual.

As night fell, I slipped out of the house, making sure my father was still occupied with his work. I drove to the small park near Brooks' apartment, a place that had become our refuge amidst the chaos. It was a quiet spot, secluded enough for us to talk without the prying eyes of the media or the judgmental gazes of our respective circles.

Brooks was already there when I arrived, leaning against his car, his posture tense. He straightened up as he saw me, his face a mix of relief and apprehension. I stepped out of my car, our eyes meeting for a brief moment before I approached him. The air between us was thick with unspoken words, and the weight of our shared troubles hanging heavily.

"Hey," he said softly as I reached him, his voice laced with a note of vulnerability that made my heart ache. "Thanks for coming."

"Of course," I replied, trying to sound as steady as I could. "We need to talk."

We walked in silence to the park bench, the night air cooling against my skin. The soft rustling of leaves and the distant hum of traffic were the only sounds breaking the stillness. We sat down, our bodies close but not touching, the space between us feeling like a chasm.

"I don't even know where to start," Brooks said, running a hand through his hair. His frustration was palpable, his eyes searching mine for answers.

"I know," I said quietly. "Things have been so messed up lately. I feel like we're just going in circles."

"I can't stand this," he admitted, his voice cracking. "The media, the rumors, the constant pressure... It's affecting everything. It's affecting me, and it's affecting us."

I nodded, feeling tears prick at the corners of my eyes. "I know.Every day feels like a battle. My father's been relentless, and the way the media keeps twisting things—it's just too much."

"Lolo, I love you," Brooks said suddenly, turning to face me fully. "I know we've been pretending to break up, but it's killing me. I need you in my life, and I need to know if you feel the same."

I took a deep breath, my emotions swirling like a storm. "I love you too, Brooks. But this situation is tearing us apart. I've been thinking a lot about our future, and I don't know if we can keep going like this. I don't know if I can handle all of this pressure."

His face fell, the hope in his eyes dimming. "So, what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that we need to make a choice," I said, my voice trembling. "We need to decide if we can handle this together or if we need to step back and figure things out separately."

Brooks was silent for a moment, the gravity of my words sinking in. "I don't want to lose you, Lolo. But I also don't want to be in a constant state of stress and uncertainty. I need to know that we're on the same page."

"We're not," I said softly. "Not right now. And I think that's why we're struggling. We need to figure out what we really want and if we can make it work despite everything."

He nodded slowly, the defeat in his posture almost unbearable. "Okay. So what now?"

"I don't know," I said honestly. "But we need to take a step back. Maybe we need some space to figure things out, to see if we can find a way to be together without everything falling apart."

Brooks looked at me, his eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and understanding. "I get it. It's not what I wanted to hear, but I understand."

As we sat in the quiet darkness, the weight of our decision felt like a heavy cloak draped over us. We both knew that this wasn't the end, but it was a pivotal moment, a crossroads where we had to decide our path forward. 

We said our goodbyes, each of us carrying the burden of our choices as we drove away from the park. The night felt endless, and the road ahead seemed shrouded in darkness, but I knew that we had made a necessary decision. It wasn't the resolution we had hoped for, but it was a start, and sometimes that's all you can ask for when everything feels like it's falling apart.