Two sides of a different coin (Rusame)

Life Lies

 Warnings starvation, and censored cursing

   My sister sat next to me. “Russia. Are you ok,” Belarus asked. “Yeah, I'm fine,” I lied. I'd rather deal with my own problems alone. “Alright just tell me if you need anything,” she sounded concerned. This bus is taking forever to get home. I wish I could just go home and read my favorite books while listening to music. 

***

   I walked downstairs for dinner. “What even is this,” Ukraine revolted. “A quarter of a piece of bread. That is a large amount you should know,” USSR answered. I think he got fried from his job again because this is not enough food. I guess it's fine my school offers lunch. I took a bite, and it was stale. “Oh. Thanks dad.” “Why do we get a small amount,” Belarus. I wanted to ask too, but when I was about to, I got too shaky and nervous.

   USSR sighed. “Do you know what happens when people are lazy, my little bell-bell?” “Um... what happens,” she asked. “Well, some people are very lazy and greedy,” the Soviet stated. “Like capitalists,” Tajikistan asked. “Yes, exactly. These lazy people half ass their job. The problem is everyone is supposed to work perfectly, so we can use all the resources in harmony,” he added “Yet they don't so now we have to work harder on their behalf.” “Why don't we just… stop relying on and fix our issues with a new system,” Belarus suggested. 

   I've never seen the USSR so shocked yet, so angry. He almost choked on his food. “Are you crazy! You kids keep running that mouth. Keep running it and you'll be running in the gulag!!” I started shaking with water rushing to my eyes, yet I held them back. I don't want my sister in the gulag. She just kind of stood there as still as a cardboard cut-out. 

   “Dad please don't send her to the gulag,” Ukraine spoke up frantically. “If she can learn to shut up I won't.” I held my sister's hand under the table, and she squeezed it together. She squeezed it so tight her nails were digging into my skin. I looked around and the Soviet states were all very anxious. Even Ukraine was anxious. 

***

   I walked into the bus still trevious from yesterday. I sat next to China. I just need to be with my friends right now. She turned and looked at me. “Get off this is North Korea's spot,” she exclaimed while pushing me off the seat. I looked around for a place to sit. There was nowhere else. “I have to sit here. Um... there's nowhere else.” “Just sit on the damn floor,” she said, annoyed. The bus driver started yelling at me about being in a seat, yet when I tried to sit down China pushed me off. This is all so stupid. What did I do to deserve to be treated this way? Nothing. I did nothing. I noticed there was one spot next to America. 

   I sat next to him. He still ignored me. That's what I wanted to happen. If he ignored me the whole way he wouldn't yell at me. I put my head on the thing next to me, still thinking about yesterday. I don't want my sister in the gulag. I sighed. I grasped my hands together. If only it was Russia or China who would do this for me. They don't care about it. I'm their backup friend, and that's all I'll ever be to them. I held them more until I could feel them shaking as my fingers dug into my skin. America started to look at me worried. I didn't want him to notice. “Russia what's wrong?” He looked up at me. I didn't expect him to ask me if we both hate each other. “You can tell me I won't tell anyone else I promise.” His voice was oddly comforting. 

   Then I remembered he is the reason why my family is hungry. “Just leave me alone, I hate you,” I snapped at him. I was expecting him to shut up, but instead he started talking. “I should've known better talking to someone like you,” he said flatly. “Same you cause the cold war and starve my people lazy f×ck!” “I have nothing to do with that,” he said, confused. His gaze softened. “Are you hungry,” he asked. I was very hungry. If he gave me food, I don't think he would be able to tell. I hesitated, “Yes I am.” 

   He did something I couldn't believe. He pulled out a can of American food. It was long and green. “What is this?” “It's Pringles. They are a type of chip,” he replied. I don't know what any of that means, but I opened it. They were skinny, thin, weird shaped, with grainy tops. I put it in my mouth. They tasted better than I thought. I should probably thank him for this. “Thank you,” I said. “You're welcome, Russia,” he said back. “Can you not tell anyone about this?” “Sure,” he said.

***

   I finally found my trio's new table. There was no room for me. “Want to sit somewhere else, comrades,” I asked. “No,” North Korea said, then continued to talk to China. They just ignored me. I looked around and sat at a random table alone. I scarfed down my free lunch. 

***

   As I walked off the bus, I started worrying about what's for dinner. I hope it's more than we got yesterday. “Do you know what's for dinner,” I asked Tajikistan. “Nyet, I have no idea.” We reached the house, and Belarus opened the door as we all walked in. I walked upstairs to my room. I started playing my piano. I made many mistakes. Each time I made a mistake I tried to fix it and failed again. Finally, I played the piece perfectly. The beautiful anthem of the USSR. The anthem of the shared beauty of this country. Maybe it isn't all beautiful.