On Broken Wings

Chapter 18

Weeks passed in a fragile, ever-cracking peace as Cassius's condition worsened. Though the light in his eyes never wavered, his limbs grew weaker, his body losing all its precious fat and muscle until his skin pulled tight against his bones despite me urging him small meals every other hour. His medicine dose increased, making his stomach queasy and unable to hold food down for long. Even now he was heaving over a bucket, what little bits of fruit he managed to eat was now gone.

I rubbed his back and brushed his hair from his face. Cassius gave me a weak, thankful smile that made my heart ache. Passing him a damp cloth to wash his face, I took the bucket to the basin and washed it, pouring out the dirty water in a separate container.

He slumped back onto the pillows. His face was exhausted with dark purple smudges beneath his eyes. Despite this, he could not sleep well; even the medicinal tea, made to help one fall asleep easily, did not last long.

"Lucifer," he called, beckoning me closer with a weak hand. I obliged, walking over to the bed, threading my fingers through his, squeezing lightly.

"Yes?"

"Lay with me."

How could I possibly deny his request? Settling down on the bed, I pulled him so that our bodies were flush with one another, taking in each freckle, every dip and curve and simply the feel of him in my arms.

Cassius huffed indignantly. "You're crushing me."

"Apologies," I murmured, but it was a lie. I wanted to hold him tighter, to never let go, even if that meant death would be upon both of us. I felt his blood moving about in his veins, passing through his beating heart. It pumped beneath his skin; it, too, wanted to live.

"I've something to ask of you."

I nodded. Who am I to refuse him? "Anything."

He looked at me with shy eyes. "Groom my wings," he offered humbly, as if he was expecting me to turn down such a moment of love and vulnerability.

I felt my body go still, mind whirling, heart bursting. What he proposed was something I never expected to hear; the story he told me of his past lover only affirming my beliefs further. For him to allow such trust in me—I nearly could breathe. "Of course, love, of course," I exhaled into the crook of his neck. "Only if I have the honor of you grooming mine."

Relief shone in his eyes. I helped him turn onto his stomach, organizing the pillows in a way to maximize his comfort. His robe was removed from his shoulders and back, leaving his skin bare, wings out and splayed on either side of him. Such a beautiful pair, once strong and impossibly fast. It was a crime to see them in such a state. But I adored them anyway, for they belonged to Cassius, and anything that belonged to Cassius was beautiful.

"I will go slowly," I said. "Tell me to stop if it grows uncomfortable for you."

He smiled. "No need. I have wanted this for a while now. I have just now gotten the courage to ask."

I started with his shoulders. Making sure my hands were warm and clean, I massaged out his tight muscles, loosening painful knots and smiling upon hearing his sighs of relief. My hands went lower, slowly, taking my time to ensure each inch of skin did not go untouched. I traced my fingers along his spine, his lower back, spending minutes on each spot before moving to the next. Once his entire back was relaxed, I rested my hands between the small patch of skin where his wings met his body just below the shoulder blades.

"I want to make sure you are still—"

"Lucifer." Cassius turned around to look me in the eye. "I want this."