Broken Ties (EN)

(8) Crossed Paths

Reason has spoken louder than the heart again. This is shaping up to be the longest day of my life. I never expected the first day of school to be so hectic. Yesterday was one of the worst, and I had some notion that today would be a peculiar day, but I never expected it to be such a storm. I can't explain it, but when the weather outside is such a mess, my personality seems to reflect it.

The morning after I stood up to the boy who made me suffer like no one else had ever done before, the silence settled on that person. And it was quiet, peaceful for the rest of the morning. The project subjects and the session with the specialist tutor went very well. They were dynamic lessons and I was super motivated by what will be taught over the years. So far, as we're at the beginning of the year, it's just going to be individual work to get to know our methods and techniques. But later on we've been told that the demands will increase and that we'll be working in teams. So far I don't have to worry about that future detail.

My concern now is Zac. Why do I care? I can't answer myself. I bet I never will.

Everything seemed to be going too well, the morning passed in no time, and then Kevin and I joined the rest of the staff. I think this is going to be my closest group of friends for the rest of the year, they were good hostesses. Anna and I really liked Sarah and Kevin. Martha, Anna's roommate, was off a lot today. According to my best friend, since it's her last year, she's 100 percent focused on her studies. And that's admissible. When I look at Sarah and Kevin, I see that they're looser, or have an easier time studying and pick up subjects well in class. Kevin draws wonderfully, I wish I had the minimum of rigor and firmness in my hand that he has. I've always been told that I have a good line, so let's find out what that really means. Maybe one day I'll make a difference in the market. Sarah, on the other hand, may be from a different background (catering) but I believe that now that she's dating Kevin, she'll always be closer to us. With Anna it's really more difficult to be together, because she's always in the sports areas, which are much further away from the classrooms where I have lessons.

But everything went well, we had lunch for the first time in the canteen, and I have to say that it has a very Hogwarts vibe, I felt like I had stepped into a Harry Potter movie. It's a canteen with a few tables along the length and the menu was somewhat complex, meatballs with spaghetti pasta. A typical Italian dish, or in other words, easy, cheap and economical.

After we'd finished our meal, chaos broke out in my head again. I don't know, but this constant anxiety gives me a massive tension headache.

We were relaxing in the garden looking at the big pond with the ducks, and making fun of the fact that Kevin is scared of them. Then the gang walked past us, and drama broke out in that place, the first time since yesterday that I'd seen them all together. I didn't understand exactly what happened there, I don't think anyone did. Zac and another boy with black hair and a dragon tattooed on his arm were in the front and the rest of the group was in the back, and out of nowhere Zac grabbed my neck and pointed clearly at me and shouted that I was his. Words that haven't left my head until now. Mathew calmed him down in the moment to avoid a bigger scandal. It was brave of him to come between the two boys, because even I, who have been here for three days, have had enough of fights and confusion.

Those words won't leave my head even though Kevin spent the next few minutes until we entered the room, butchering my mind not to say anything, not to confront him. Ignoring has been my escape from confusion all my life. But with this being, my patience is different, because yesterday he messed with my feelings like no one had ever done before, he left my emotions in a tremendous rave, like Riley from the movie Amusingly.

No matter how hard I tried to forget those words, it was impossible. This anatomy class wasn't helping either, although the teacher seemed to be a super nice and approachable person, his monotonous lecture was making me travel in my thoughts, so I decided to start drawing. I like drawing people, especially men. Their muscles are made up of geometric shapes, little circles that make the human body extremely curious and challenging, because it's important to play with harmony and line. My only aim was to distract myself from the time I'd spent in the garden.