Don't say Goodbye

Chapter 32

* L's POV *

My knees bent down the ground tremblingly.

I closed my eyes as tears continuesly flowing down to my chin. I bowed my head and squeeze my left chest.

I want to scream because I feel pain in my heart. But I can't, I feel weakness. My voice shut off.

I just keep on crying.

I can't hear anything.

"KRYSSSTAAAAAALLLLLL!!!" I shouted as I got the chance to inhale a big breathe.

"Krystal..." I keep on repeating her name.

"L?" Mrs. Kim called me, I look up to her and she helped me to stand up.

"How .. How did you know?" She wondered

I didn't explained anything. I keep shut off. I was lacked of words.

"I'm sorry L. But ... Krystal, Jazzmine is gone" she said crying too

I shooked my head "it's a lie. Please tell me you're just lying" I said trying to convince myself.

"I'm saying the truth. C'mon, come inside if you want to see Jazzmine for the last time"

"I don't want to see her lying on a coffin. Please tell me how? I can't understand what is happening?" I asked curiously

"She was hurt.. She always cry.. Until we discoverd she has a heart cancer. Because she was abused emotionally. She's blaming herself that's why she chose .. To die, she's .. Jazzmine is.. tired"

"This is all my fault" I mumbled as I hurt, punch and slapped my self.

Mrs. Kim hold my wrists to stopped me "Ssshhh no, don't blame yourself. It's destined. It's God willingness. Maybe .. Her life is just until here"

I never tought of this scene in my life. This is so unfair. Why Jessica? Why Jazzmine? Why?

5 months is long. Long time I didn't see her. I pursue to follow her in America.

Then... This....

This will welcome me here?

A dead body of my love?

"Are you sure you don't want to see her?"

"I think I can't" I answered. This is completely a grief for me.

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(A/n: Please if u have a music or mp3 of 'Don't say Goodbye' by Davichi? Play it while reading. You will be touch)

(After 2 days of funeral)

* L's POV *

Today, my very grief day. Jazzmine will be put on her last place.

...

I can't take it but, this would be the last time I can see her. I can touch her. But I'm afraid. Afraid of accepting the truth that's she's completely gone now.

I sat down on a stool beside Jazzmine's coffin. Everyone is looking at me. I can't hold my tears. I wear my guitar. I will sing a song..

♪Don't say Goodbye by Davichi (English translation)♪

"It was the first time that I saw your shaking up

What words will you say? Why are you just counting the time?

Just like the lyric that all the sad premonitions will come true

No way, it isn't true, it won't be true
It must not be true

You already left me even your heart and your body left me

I don't know, please somebody tell me how I can catch you"

I keep on crying. I relate my whole self and situation with this sad song.

Does my life is created as sad and melodramatic one? Do I have any chance to be happy?

"Don't say that word tonight, why did you leave me?

My mind is hurt, my heart is hurt, the tears are coming to me

Don't say goodbye yet, don't open your mouth anyway

Don't say goodbye to me"

I strummed my guitar and continue again

"Your single cold word made me down
Like the whole world is being destroyed, my tears come and come again

After this time, after this time we can't see each other forever"

It hitted me a lot.

We can't see each other from now on Jazzmine.

"I love you, don't leave the one that loved you to death

I don't know what the farewell is, I just feel sad and sad

I still have a lot of stories, a lot of memories, my heart is torn to pieces

Don't say Goodbye yet, don't open your mouth anyway

Don't say goodbye to me...."

Though it so hard for me, my feet walked by theirselves.

I glanced slowly to Jazzmine. It just made me broken. I closed my swollen eyes and touch the glass of her coffin. I lean my head on it "I love you always Krystal" I said and my tears are keep from rolling.

I hugged her coffin. Mr. Kim halting me but I thightly hold on it. I don't want to leave her.

Until many hands are helping together to take me away from Jazzmine's body.

They lead me inside the van because I feel I'll be fainting. Will it be the last goodbye? I should prepare for this. Because I'm such a big jerk. This is a Karma.

I should think many times before I do a move. If I just bring policemen, If I plan better. Krystal would not be shot by the gun. Jessica would not be needed to suffer her heart. Krystal will be fine. Both of them will not die.

Goodbye.. I hate that word!

I won't use that anymore.

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A/n: I have a teaser of DON'T SAY GOODBYE but.. It's always raining I can't upload it.. We don't have a wifi. Poor girl -.-