are we friends or more?

20

Miya Kehlani Kior

i'm currently in my room vibing to Mariah The Scientist when all of a sudden my mom just barges into my bedroom. "yes she is right here and that will be perfect okay okay thank alright bye bye" my mom says as she hangs up the phone. "ummmm yes?" I question as I look at her standing in my doorway as she gets off the phone with someone. "how do you feel about going to therapy?" my mom looks at me in question. I sit up in hesitation. "therapy for what?" I asked. "Miya you just been off lately like every time I try and talk to you about your feelings or when I know something is bothering you, you just shut me out like it's nothing and i'm your mom I don't want you to feel like you can't talk to me about any problems you have going on so i decided to sign you up for therapy so you at least have someone to talk to and get whatever is heavy on your chest off" my mom says trying to get me to understand. "so I wanted to ask if you'll at least just try it you never know you may like it and it may be something that really strikes a interest in you" my mom says. "fine i'll go but when is it?" I ask in question. "it is in a hour so I need you to shower get dressed so we can head out" my says as she begins getting ready to walk out my room. "okay" I say in acceptance. "i'll be downstairs waiting for you" my mom says as she walks out and closes my door lightly.

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how am I supposed to feel about this? I mean it all came out of nowhere.. like one moment i'm literally just in my room listening to music the next i'm getting ready for therapy..? It won't hurt to try maybe this will actually help.. I just hope the therapist I have is at least understanding because I have a lot to get off my chest.

I decided to take a shower and pick out my outfit I'm going to wear. "hmm this is a chill outfit" I said as I grabbed my grey leggings a white crop top with my grey pull over nike hoodie with my uggs. I get dressed put some deodorant on and my Victoria Secret bare vanilla perfume topped with my bare vanilla lotion. I put my cross necklace on and my pandora bracelets then I grab my phone and my Airpod max and head downstairs. "i'm ready" I tell my mom as I grab a cold water from the fridge and head outside to the car. I get in the front put my seatbelt on and put my phone on the charger. one thing I hate is having a dead phone. I play my 'calm mind' playlist and enjoy the ride. after a 20 minute drive we make it to our destination. I take my phone off the charger then take off my seatbelt and get out the car. I grab my water and walk inside the place with my mom. I go sit down in the waiting room as my mom goes signs in. ugh i'm so nervous for what all I got to do is talk right?? nothing to be nervous about this will help me...hopefully. my mom walks to me after signing in and sits right beside me. we wait for about 5 minutes before I hear my name being called. "Ms. Yanna will see you now" here goes nothing I guess can't turn back now.. "let me know how it goes Miya i'll be in here the whole time waiting for you" my mom says. I walk up where the lady is and follow her to this room this room was different it was like a peaceful safe place not just a boxed room. "Hello Miya my name is Iyanna and i'm going to be your therapist, you may take a seat" I give her a soft smile and sit down nervously. "I know you maybe nervous but let me tell you there is no reason to be nervous i'm here to help you and listen anything you have to say without judgement and the good part is if you tell me something I don't run back and tell your parents it all stays between us two" Iyanna says as she looks at me in reassurance and closes the door. "is there any questions you have for me before we get started with our session today?" Iyanna asks me as she looks at me. "umm how old are you and how long have you been a therapist for?" I ask as I sit up in my seat. "I am 18 years old and I have been a therapist for about a year now" Iyanna says as she gives me a soft smile. "oh okay we're close in age good to know so do you like girls?" I ask actually wanting to know. Iyanna looks at me in judgement. "oh i'm sorry if that question made you uncomfortable I was just- you know what never mind pretend I didn't ask that" I say in embarrassment. "no reason to be embarrassed and i'm sorry i didn't mean to give that look but to answer your question yes I do indeed like females" Iyanna says as she laughs. "okay how about we get started with our session" Iyanna says as she sits up in a professional position. Iyanna is so pretty to me she is about 5'2 brown with low eyes but not forced it was like her eyes are naturally low. "so your mom told me you been shutting everything out and she been trying to het you to speak to her about your problems but you just stay quiet. can you tell me why that is?" she asked.

"mm you all in my business for real" I said bluntly clearly annoyed. "Miya that is my job to hear you out, to hear what is bothering you, everything that is bothering you I know this is a new thing to you but this is what my job is all about is for you to get everything off your chest so I can help you and guide you to see how your feelings, thoughts, choices, and actions affect each other." Iyanna explains. "i'm just here to understand everything Miya I don't mean to just seek into any part that is uncomfortable and if there is certain parts you want to leave out for now just because you're not all the way comfortable that is perfectly okay this is just the first day so i'm not expecting you to just blurt out everything just go at your own pace there is no judgement here i'm only here to help." Iyanna says in comfort.

yeah this is going to be a very long journey..