Can't you feel my heart beating? (Gabenath)

Chapter 13

Gabriel awoke to the sun's morning rays shining directly onto his face. He yawns, slowly allowing his eyes to adjust to the light and then reach for his glasses.

It feels strange to feel so well rested even after he's been sleeping on a pull out couch for the past weeks. But that's just what Nathalie's closeness does to him. The knowledge that she and their son are only a few steps away from him allows him to sleep in utter peace, and he wouldn't change that for the world.

Nathalie allows him to stay with them most days of the week. They've slowly fallen into a routine where he helps with household chores and taking care of Alexander. He loves the quietness they've built but sometimes he wonders if she'll regret it all and push him away. She isn't overly serious with him, but he can't deny the resentment he feels coming from her sometimes. He thinks that in those times, she's recalled something he did to her and it's impossible for her to not feel such sadness.

Sometimes it feels like there's an invisible wall between them, one which won't allow them to progress from this routine they've created. The fears of his mistakes always make him wonder how he'll cope with it all if she were to ever regret keeping his presence nearby.

She occasionally smiles at him when they're speaking about their baby, but then that smile fades when they're not. Alexander's innocence hasn't been able to remove those feelings of resentment he knows she feels. He treated her terribly, he can't expect them to vanish so quickly. He deserves it all, and yet it still hurts.

———

During their months at the mansion, Gabriel had shown her many things, but also kept many things hidden. He'd shown her how fiercely he was able to give into her charm, and then how quickly he was able to make it all disappear when the sun came up.

And even after all those things, Gabriel had managed to keep things hidden. He never made his family, his home, or his legal issues a topic of conversation with her. It was never his desire to do so. However, it's changed now. He doesn't feel how he felt all those months ago. The arrival of his son has come to turn everything around. The bitterness in him has slowly vanished. It's been replaced by the joy of Alexander's innocence.

He loves his little boy more than anything in this world.

And he wishes him and Nathalie would be something more than just two adults co parenting a child...

———

Gabriel adjusts the bed, and it quickly transforms back into a sofa. He folds the blankets, and pats down the pillows, making it look presentable again. As he makes his way towards the bathroom, the doorbell rings.

He doesn't have time to wonder who's at the door because as soon as he opens it, he finds Paul standing at the doorway with a stack of folders in between his hands.

"Paul..." he mumbles in shock, "what are you doing here?"

Paul looks at him with a bit of confusion. Seeing Gabriel answering Nathalie's door with nothing but his pajamas has sparked many questions in him.

"Gabriel, I came to speak with Nathalie... What are you doing here? I've been trying to contact you for weeks."

Gabriel sighs and moves away from the door, looking rather annoyed with Paul's sudden appearance.

"Where's Nathalie?" Paul asks, letting himself in.

"She's still asleep, so I think it's best you leave."

Paul turns around making sure to show his confusion with Gabriel's sudden words. "I need to speak with her."

"About what?" Gabriel asks.
"You and Nathalie haven't signed the divorce papers, and I need to know why."