The Alpha's Mistress

65

Word Count: 1957

~Sienna

Stifling a yawn into my hand, I stare vacantly out the window.

Time slips by so slowly here. There's nothing to fill the long, endless hours with other than the ridiculous study Zion forces me to do.

All I can think about is Onyx...

At every moment I'm wondering what he's doing, what he's thinking. Has he gotten close to finding a way to get me out of his horror situation? Or is he losing his mind like I'm starting to do?

Seeing him the other day standing over Alston made my stomach churn. His knuckles were red and his eyes were vacant and unrecognisable.

He beat Alston like it meant nothing. He let some darker, colder part of himself take over and everyone important witnessed it.

Lennon will understand, but Imogen...I'm afraid his fragile alliance with her has been shattered.

Personally I know he hasn't lost his mind, even if Zion prefers I think that way. He's losing his mate, the person he loves. I'm also struggling, and I felt hopeless when he was marrying Violet.

"Still studying?"

I jump, looking over my shoulder.

Alston leans against the doorframe, a soft smile playing on his lips. The swelling in his face has gone down, and the light has returned to his crystal blue eyes. Still, a violent gash splits the skin over his cheekbone and jawline, and bruising licks across the entire right side of his face.

"He's restricted me from reading real books, so this is all I got as entertainment," I admit blandly, gesturing down to the endless stack of papers on rudimentary pack politics.

Zion is keeping all the important information just out of my reach. Even he is worried I'm going to get back to Onyx's pack.

"Why don't we go on a walk?" Alston offers.
 
"That would actually be very nice." I stand, grabbing a coat off the hook on the wall. "If I go with you, the guards might not follow me everywhere."

They trail me like I'm a criminal, watching my every move like hawks. Being in this room is my only escape from them, unless I'm with Alston.

No one knows him and I are working together. Zion assumes Alston is trying to seduce me for his own benefit, which makes him my only friend here.

"It is suffocating here. Even for me." He rubs the back of his neck, his brows furrowing. "I can't imagine what you're going through."

We leave my room, falling into step with each other as we walk down the hallway. Mercifully the guards cast me one look with him and remain at their post.

"The worst part is I'm living in my own personal nightmare," I admit quietly.

He scans the side of my face. "What do you mean?"

I wait until we are outside before I feel the confidence to speak. The cool air flushes against my cheeks and I'm able to release a deep breath burdened by horror of having to live within the suffocating walls of my childhood home.

"Zion was cruel to me growing up, and even worse to my mother," I tell him tensely. "She died only a couple years after she smuggled me out of here."

He looks out at the forest, at the dull light forming shadows within its depths. Clouds hug the sky, smothering the sun, suiting my mood.

"I was wondering how you got away from him," he murmurs.

"She sacrificed everything to get me free." Emotion chokes in my throat, forcing me to clear it uneasily. "If he caught us trying to escape, he would have killed her."

He almost did that night. He may have grabbed me that night with a grip that bruised my skin and yelled at me with a voice that sounded otherworldly, he hurt my mother beyond compare. How she managed to get us out is beyond me, but I'm glad she did.

"She sounds brave." He slides his hands into his pockets.

Vacantly I know I shouldn't be telling him this story, that it's just another thing he can use against me if he chooses to. I haven't even been able to tell Onyx the full story of what happened to me, but right now, it feels good to get off my chest.

"She was. She got sick and died quite quickly." Tears prickle the back of my eyes and my throat aches from the effort of not crying. "It was...traumatising."

I try not to think about. She was a shell of herself when we left here, and died so swiftly I didn't get a proper goodbye. Thinking about it only hurts.

"I can imagine. I'm sorry you had to go through that," he offers gently.

"I want him dead, Alston." I pin him with a look, knowing that he knows exactly who I'm talking about. "I need him to die."

His eyes trace over my face, soft but intense.

"Everything will be sorted when I can get you to Onyx tomorrow," he says after a long moment of silence.

I sigh, looking down at my shoes which pad through soft grass. Alston knows what a monster Zion is, but still doesn't want to act against him. I would feel resentment toward him for it did I not know what not protecting his interests could cost him.

"I'm anxious to see him." I rub my hands together, the cold nipping at my fingertips.

He falls silent for a whole tense minute, deep in thought. I wait with bated breath for his response, still trying to keep on his good side.

"Is he really your mate?" He asks suddenly.

"Yes." I frown. "Why would I lie about that?"

"Maybe to get more time with him, I don't know." He curses under his breath, shaking his head as he looks up at the sky. "You two just don't seem so well...matched, is all."

I almost laugh. Alston has only seem glimpses of me with Onyx and yet feels like he can make that assumption.

"We're perfectly matched. You don't know the Onyx I do." I rub my arm, a chill deeper than my skin settling in. "He's the perfect man for me."

No one gets to see the real Onyx. No one sees him beyond who is as an Alpha. I see the Onyx who comforted me for long nights after my mother died, who plays cards with me in the barn and who knows me better than I even know myself.

"I guess so."

"There is no questioning he's my mate, anyway. I feel so weak and unwell being away from him," I mutter.

I'm figuring that's what has been feeling so off about me recently. I feel sick and fatigued and I can't get him out of my head...more than usual anyway.

"You'll feel better by tomorrow then." He looks away, something clearly bothering. I'm not in any mood to ask, especially when he's acting like Onyx isn't my mate.

"I wonder what option Onyx is going to want to choose," I bring up vacantly. I'm leaning toward one option, but the decision is still impossible to make.

"The choice ultimately comes down to you," he reminds me cautiously. "You're the one who has to live it."

"I know that. I'm still unsure of what I want."

"Being married to me wouldn't be all that bad." He smiles wryly, pushing away that strange darkness that encroached on him a moment ago. "I promise that."

I try to laugh but a hollow ache splits through my ribs instead. Maybe I could laugh about it were that not a very possible option for me to choose. The problem with marrying him is that he would have a claim to me forever, and I'm not sure I can risk that.

"Is that the option you want me to choose?" I stare at him sidelong.
 
He considers that for a moment. "An heir would be more a sure thing, but if we were too..."

He looks down at me, his eyes having gone from a soft cornflower blue to dark and tumultuous. I stiffen, having to force myself to put one foot in front of the other as the implication settles over me.

"Yeah..."

"I would want you to be willing, completely," he states firmly. "I would never want to force you."

I supress a shiver, not wanting my repulsion to be so evident at risk of hurting his feelings. Being forced to produce an heir with Alston would destroy something inside of me, but at least that way I could guarantee Zion's death and ensure I would see Onyx again...

It truly is an impossible decision.

"Don't tell me you actually want to have sex with me?" I pull a face to make sure he knows I'm joking, but he just stares at me.

"Would it be such a bad thing if I did?"

"Of course it would be." I stop short, facing him. "Please tell me you don't have feelings for me."

Onyx alluding to something, but I want him to be wrong about that. Alston developing any feelings toward me would be ruin my plans.

His pretty face contorts into a tense grimace. "I just think you're beautiful."

"You said yourself you like what belongs to others. I think you just like that I'm Onyx's mate," I bring up, planting my hands on my hips.

He seems taken aback. "After these two weeks, do you really think that?"
 
"I think I hardly know you at all," I snap before quickly lowering my voice. Any of Zion's lackey's overhearing us would break the façade we've been maintaining.

"You'll learn more about me." He steps forward a touch, offering a tense smile. "And I think you'll like me."

I open my mouth to bite back something harsh, but he's moving quickly. My mouth barely presses closed before his lips are on mine, his hands grabbing either side of my face.

I'm momentarily stunned. There's something insistent, something possessive in the way he kisses me. It feels like he's taking something from me rather than giving me his affection, wanting to prove something to himself.

Pressing my hands to his chest, I unceremoniously shove him off me with all my might, stumbling back a few steps.

"Alston!"

He presses his palms to either side of his face, a flash of mortification appearing. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have that."

"No shit." I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, still tasting him on my lips. "You don't have feelings for me, Alston. I'm just someone here, when you're away from your pack and the life you knew. I'm someone you might have to marry, may have to spend a lot of your life with. You only want to like me."

"You don't know that." His expression is devastated, torn about and ravaged by rejection, by misunderstanding.

"I do." I back up. "That's the only explanation that will suffice."

"You have no idea what I'm feeling..." His jaw hardens as he wipes his hand down his face, shaking his head.

I don't know what to say, left grasping for words that fall through my fingers like sand. He doesn't wait for my reply, storming back to the manor.

I'm done for.

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