The Alpha's Mistress

68

Word Count: 2193

~Sienna

I did end up falling asleep...eventually.

Not until Onyx wrung as many orgasm's out of me as possible. I was so exhausted, my body weak and thoroughly used that I couldn't help the fitful sleep I've tumbled into.

Only to stumble headfirst into an old memory in the form of a dream.

I can feel the pain, the grief. It's all over my body, but especially in my stomach, in my heart. The loss grapples with the loneliness as I sit with my back against a kitchen counter, the polished stone floor cold beneath me.

My mother's funeral was today. She died so quickly, so unexpectedly that it still doesn't feel real.

Unfortunately the numbness has melted into grief and the feeling that I'm truly alone. We escaped my father and now the only person I had is gone.

My throat is thick and sore and no matter how much I blot at my cheeks, they are immediately soaked again by falling tears.

It's late; past midnight at least. A strip of moonlight illuminates me through the kitchen window, and empty plate of muffins Diane made.

Footsteps wander into the kitchen behind me, near silent behind the sounds of my sobbing.

I freeze, pausing my crying as I glance up to see Onyx has circled the counter. He stares down at me, hair tousled, eyes tired. He's wearing loose sleeping pants and a charcoal shirt, clearly having come down to get something to drink.

I barely know Onyx. He's just been announced as Alpha, but other than living in the same house as him, we have nothing in common, as far as I know.

Despite being similar in age, he shows no indication that he wants anything to do with me. Ever since my mother and I arrived at his doorstep begging for a job, he's avoided me.

He's so beautiful, and tall and forbidden. He's only a young Alpha, still being mentored by his mother, but he's born for that position. He enjoys solitude and long, intent stares that make my skin warm.

I just wish he would talk to me.

Right now he stares at me blankly, dragging his gaze over my tear streaked face, rumpled clothing and splotchy red cheeks.

I expect him to turn and walk away, to pretend he never saw me. Instead, his brows draw together and he crouches down to my level.

"Sienna...is everything alright?" He asks, his voice as soft as silk.

"No. Nothing is alright." A fresh wave of sobs overcome me. I bow my head, letting my hair drape in a curtain around my face, not wanting him to see my shame.

"The funeral was..." He rubs a hand through his hair tensely. "Well...I'm sorry."

Sniffing, I risk a glance up at him. He's blurry beneath a sheen of tears. This is the most attention he's paid me since I arrived beyond a few sentences in passing.

"The funeral was perfect. Your mother did well," I murmur.

Onyx offers a smile, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "She did."

The effort put into it made my heart melt. Lucia loved my mother too, and so did Onyx. They are grieving too.

"It hurts, Onyx." I clutch my hand over my chest, wishing my heart below would stop aching so much. "I know you couldn't care less, but it hurts..."

He flinches. "You don't think I care?"

"Why would you? You're becoming Alpha, you've got so much going on and...well, you hate me." I shrug helplessly. I would never have the courage to admit that on any other day, but I'm too overcome by emotion to care.

Being that Onyx is only just stepping up into his new role, there is so much for him to do in a day. He's almost never home anymore, tied to duties I don't dare inquire into.

"Oh Sienna, of course I care. I just didn't know if any words would be good enough." Devastation and frustration at himself stain his expression. "And I do not hate you."

"You avoid me at all cost. It's like I annoy you or something," I mumble, wiping under my eyes.

"Look at me." He takes my chin in his hand, tilting my head so our gazes meet. "I do not hate you. I only avoid you because I feel as though I everything I say to you is wrong. I find myself losing my train of thought when you're near, and I can't explain it."

"Oh."

I've been faced with the same quandary. I wouldn't know how to speak to someone like him, with so much power and youth. His whole life is in front of him while mine has felt as though it's been ripped away from me. I don't know how to relate to him...

Perhaps that is my problem. I cannot fathom a world where Onyx would struggle to speak to me, but maybe we are different people, but face loneliness and isolation all the same.

"I've never had a sister before," he admits coarsely. "I worry I cannot eloquently communicate how I feel to you."

A chasm opens up in my chest. "You see me as your sister?"

I would be lying if I didn't say I had a crush on him...how could I not? Beyond his looks, I see the way he conversed with my mother and his own, and how fairly he treats his people. He's going to be a good husband, and I envy who will be his wife one day.

"No...no, nothing like that," he dismisses quickly. "Not that you aren't welcome here forever. Your mother's passing and me becoming Alpha has changed nothing here."

"I can stay?" I straighten.

"Forever if you please. That bedroom is always yours." He smiles gently, smoothing my hair back away from my face with a touch so tender it presses back the most jagged edges of my grief.

"Even when you marry?"