The Timeline [h.s.]

63.

February 25th, 2018:

Opening up to someone, Claire had found out, was truly one of the most exhausting things ever.

No wonder many people simply chose to never do it and go on with their lives as best as they could.

Which didn't make it right, of course, Claire knew that.

It was just.... mentally and physically exhausting.

She had just gotten home from her very second session with Donna, held at Prospera from 11AM to 12PM, when Donna had lunch and Claire left to have lunch at home with her friends and her baby. Sunday was supposed to be a day to rest, but Donna said that she actually didn't mind seeing Claire on Sundays, if it helped her feel better.

Claire had picked those days because she had thought that, if talking to Donna made her feel extremely nervous, at least she'd have the thought of the yoga classes in the evening she could attend with Jack and Katie to unwind. To feel better.

She had been, surprisingly enough, correct. But not in the sense she had been expecting.

It had just happened that, after her first session with Donna, Claire had cried so much she had exhausted herself. The yoga class - to which she had been tempted to not show up at all, and had just done so after Jack had pleaded with her to do so - had been an excellent way to unplug from all of her emotions, for once, and empty her mind. Claire had found it incredibly easy to do, after such a tiring morning spent searching her soul and confessing to things she had never said to anyone, in fear of being judged.

And, although this she would've never admitted to David because she didn't want to see him gloating about having been right all along, exercising did make her feel better physically and emotionally. Even if the exercise in question was just yoga, which seemed so innocuous to the outside eye.

So, Sunday sessions were officially in. A new part and chapter of her life.

As long as Donna wouldn't have anything to object to, Claire would've been more than fine with them.

Obviously, being fine with the concept of the sessions and then taking part in an actual one-on-one session were two completely different things.

As mentioned above, Claire found them exhausting.

For starters, it felt like her body itself refused to cooperate, when it came to talking about things and baring herself to Donna. Her throat would get all clogged up, starting to hurt, and her head would start to throb. Her fingers would shake and her voice would come out unsure and trembling. It felt as if Claire was afraid both of what she wanted to say and of people's reactions to it - even though the only person Claire spoke to, during the sessions, was Donna. The thought of a group session was enough to make her heartbeat spike like crazy, and even Donna had said that it was too easy for that.

Another problem Claire was encountering with her sessions was that she had so much to say that she found herself tripping over her words, often changing topics or losing track of what she was talking about. She hadn't been aware of how many things she had been harboring until she had had to open her mouth and start speaking about something, to begin the whole path with Donna. Hadn't she been there to guide her with questions, Claire would've found herself lost inside the labyrinth that was her mind, especially the corner where she had pushed the drawer with all the things that had ever hurt her. Things she had sworn she would've never thought about, ever again.

Yawning, she made her way up Oakington Manor Dr, clutching her purse to her side and blinking very fast to get rid of the tears that clouded her eyes. She wanted nothing more than to eat something very quickly, have a little chat with Theodore and then cuddle on the bed with him for a little nap before she ought to go to the gym with Jack - Katie was, once again, in Canada, for her time to move there permanently, or for the duration of the shooting of this short independent movie she had been cast in, was getting closer and closer and she was working on the logistics of that.