Split

Thrilled - Ch. 17

Holden knew things were falling apart for Henry, and he wished he could do anything to help.

He didn't really appreciate the fact that he was now getting with Nick, but maybe he knew it was only a matter of time until that happened, he did suspect Henry wasn't fully straight.

He sighed, and looked around, he was on their bed, a Wednesday afternoon, Nick was sitting on the desk writing something.

Henry wanted to say something, but Holden didn't let him do that.

This conflict was getting out of their hands, and they couldn't ever take a break from each other.

And Holden wished he could begin again, and let Henry have what he already had before, that person he unintentionally messed with.

"It would really help out if you dragged your ass over here and actually finish the work, only need to make the references." Nick said, without looking behind him.

That's when Henry realized he was half naked, but didn't really mind it.

He sighed as he rolled off the bed, and walked towards the desk, where he sat on the extra chair, to type the references on the presentation.

"I was actually meaning to ask something." Henry said, as he typed, and copied-pasted some text.

Nick nodded, his usual bored stare burned like a laser, and his half-brushed hair looked like gold, shimmering with the afternoon dusk.

"How did you realize you were Pansexual?" Henry asked, raising an eyebrow, as he saved the file.

Nick hummed, and thought for a second, lowering his eyes.

"I guess when i was younger, i always knew that whoever entered my life would be someone that i really find interesting." Nick explained. "Or that i liked how they were."

"That's why I dated Ellie, she was the most interesting girl I've ever known, she loves poetry and philosophy, and the intrinsic talk we had was invaluable."

"And Jack, he was kind of a loner, but he had so much to share, he showed me a perspective where you are so insignificant, but so valuable, and that you won't ever know how it feels not to feel anything." He reminisced. "Maybe that's what he feels right now." He said, with a sad tone.

"And Holden, he is a rebel, kind of a free spirit, I just knew that he didn't know where to go, but he understands how to get there." Nick finished. "You're not Holden, you are someone completely different."

A part of Holden wanted to scream and cry, but he felt drowned out by the weird sensation he always felt when surrounded by Nicholas, like his own thoughts got wild, and made him become a total asshole.

"That's, actually pretty understandable, but why are you... Interested in me at all?" Henry asked. "It's not like I'm super special or interesting."

"You have kind of a magnet-pull, I can't help but feel like I need to get closer to you, you are intriguing, but abnormally average for that matter." Nick tried to explain.

"It's like you never try, but you always manage to get out of your bad times, and survive another day."

It sounds clingy, Nick knew that, Henry knew that, Holden felt he was cringing just at that description.

"Maybe I'm thinking too much Into it, I can't describe what you do to me, but you are somehow more appealing than your asshole Alter-Ego."

"Maybe you're onto something with that." Henry blurted out, as he turned the PC off.

Nick stared, and Henry stared back.

"And you, how did you realize you were...?" Nicholas asked back.

"I haven't figured it out yet, but I like you somehow, that I'm sure of." Henry admitted.

He stared right at Nick's eyes, but his gaze suddenly moved towards his lips.

"That's fine by me." Nick whispered.

In a rapid motion their lips got closer and started to touch in a hurry, like they needed to make it quick.

But there wasn't any hurry, no one was going anywhere else.

But something always buzzed Henry a lot, and he wished it could just stop, his heart pounded like he was guilty, or in constant adrenaline.

He was thrilled, but he hated that feeling.

- - • • • - -

"So like, if I killed a man, would you be my alibi?" Noah asked, like it was a trick question.

"What the hell is he talking about?" Holden thought.

"Sure, but I know you wouldn't hurt a fly." Henry reassured.

Henry had a tender smile, but in reality he was being eaten by the guilt.

"Dude, you look like you did kill a man." Noah laughed. "What crime did you commit?"

Henry laughed back, uncomfortably.

He didn't like being pulled from his safe zone that he had with Noah, but he couldn't find the way to say 'i'm fucking your young brother'.

Who would even say such a thing.