Fervent Feelings

X1 Chapter 1 - Where Your Eyes Don't Go

When I was a little girl, I grew up next to a boy who was about ten years older than me. As a newborn, my parents often had him babysit me when they were off at work but as I got older, we'd often embark on small adventures around the neighborhood; weaving through the woods and fields like explorers on a quest. He had an older brother, but the he was rarely around due to his job. Every felt simple back then, at least until something inside me began to change when I was just 4 years old. I started acting out in ways that didn't make sense, lashing out even when there was nothing to be upset about, more than what was considered odd for a toddler.

It was subtle at first, but after a few months, something happened—something that scared them, when I was with the Summers family. My parents called me a freak, a monster, though I couldn't understand why. I must have done something terrifying that day, something that made even my parents afraid of me. I remember Alex, the older of the two Summers brothers, getting into a heated argument with them. But it didn't matter in the end; they left me behind in the dead of night while I slept, vanishing from my life without a trace.

The Summers took me in when they didn't have to. That's when I learned the truth about myself—what I am, what they are. A mutant. The memories of my life before the Summers are hazy, fragments of a past I can barely recall. I don't remember much about my parents, their faces or voice.. After that, I was sheltered, and kept myself away from people, terrified at the idea of being around others. My 'mutation' was far from a gift—it was a curse. I could feel people's emotions as if they were my own. If someone nearby was scared, that fear would consume me too—my heart racing, breaths coming in short, staggered gasps, the hair on my neck standing on end.

When Scott's mutation manifested a couple months after the 'incident', Alex sat us down and told us about him—Professor Xavier. The idea of leaving the place I had grown up in terrified me; it was the only place that had ever felt safe. But Alex reassured me, and before long, I found myself in Westchester, New York, far from the familiar world I knew.

Seventeen years have passed since then, and not much has changed. I'm now a counselor at the school for gifted youngsters, a place where those like us can find solace. Charles believes my abilities can provide comfort to others, a safe space for those who need it. For the longest time, I kept to myself, hiding away in my room, until the professor taught me how to safeguard my mind. I can now lightly influence others' emotions with a touch, though nothing extraordinary—I'm still working on that with Jean and Charles.

***

I sit in my office, chatting with Ororo as the soft hum of the small TV fills the room. The screen shows a news report about the upcoming United Nations World Summit meeting on Ellis Island.

"So, do you think Jean will be able to convince them we aren't a threat?" I ask, my gaze lingering on the flickering images.

Ororo's voice is calm and reassuring, as it always is. "I don't know, we can only hope," she replies, her eyes still on the screen. But then, she suddenly looks toward me, her expression shifting. I raise an eyebrow in silent question.

"It's Charles...they've found something Magneto's planning," she says, her tone serious now. She rises from her seat, pushing the chair back with a gentle scrape against the floor. "You coming?"

I laugh softly, shaking my head as I reach for the remote to turn off the TV. "The day you convince me to get on that jet is the day I lose all my sanity."

Ororo grins a playful light in her eyes. "It was worth a try." I stand up from my desk, circling around it to meet her at the door.

"I'll always be there to see you off, though," I say with a smile as we exit the room. Just then, we spot my brother speed-walking toward us, his expression determined.

"I see you got the news as well," I comment as he approaches.

"Yeah, Charles wants us to head out right away," Scott replies, his focus shifting to Ororo.

The elevator doors slide open, and the three of us step out, our footsteps echoing against the metal floors as we move with urgency. We make our way to the room where their uniforms are stored, the air thick with anticipation.

"This will always be here for you if you change your mind, you know?" Ororo nods toward a case that holds a suit tailored perfectly to my size.

Scott chuckles as he sits on a bench, zipping up his boot. "Still trying to convince her?"

I flick the side of his head, earning an exaggerated wince from him as he instinctively cradles his 'wound.' "Ow," he scoffs.

"Oh, please, you're fine," I say with a smirk, watching him stand up. He ruffles my hair with a gloved hand, a familiar gesture that brings a small smile to my face.

"Stay in touch, yeah?" he asks, even though we both know the answer.

I nod, the unspoken promise hanging between us.

***

I sit in a swivel chair beneath the mansion, anxiously waiting for someone to update me. By now, Jean and Charles have made their way back. My fingers drum restlessly against the table, the silence pressing in on me.

"Come on, you can do it," Jean encourages, her arms folded as she leans forward from across the table. Her red hair frames her face like a fiery halo.

"Jean, I don't know...the average teen, I might be able to persuade, but you're...you," I laugh, trying to brush off her suggestion. She raises a brow, her expression unimpressed, her lips pursed in disappointment.

"Alright, alright..." I whine, taking a deep breath. I focus on how I want her to feel...let's try...sad? I reach across the cold metal table, placing a tentative hand on hers. I channel my own memories of anguish, letting the emotions wash over me. My breath becomes shaky, tears welling up in my eyes as my heart races. But Jean doesn't budge, her composure unbroken.

Frustration bubbles up inside me, and I pull my hand back with a scoff, turning away from her. "See, it's no luck."

"No...look," she says softly, drawing my attention back to her. I turn in my chair, watching as a single tear escapes from her eye.

"Progress," Jean smiles, wiping the tear away with a gentle hand.

A beeping noise suddenly cuts through the moment, coming from the consoles near us. Jean quickly stands from her seat, hurrying over to them.

"They're back." She looks up from the computers, closing her eyes likely sensing if any of them are hurt. "And they brought company..."

I watch the monitors as the jet hovers above the basketball court, waiting for the ground to open up. As soon as it lands, I rush out of the room and down the hall, my heart pounding with anticipation.

The door to the hangar slides open, revealing Ororo guiding a young, anxious girl beside her. Scott appears behind them, supporting a man who seems to be unconscious.

"Y/n!" Scott calls out with a smile as he drags the body along with him.

"Who's this?" I ask, motioning to the stranger.

"The girl said his name is Logan. He's like us..." I turn my gaze to the young girl, her eyes wide with fear, her entire body trembling.

"My name's Y/n," I say gently, extending a hand for her to shake.

"Marie--I mean, uhm, Rogue," she replies, her voice soft with a noticeable Southern accent. Her gloved hand wraps around mine, and I give her a reassuring squeeze.

Jean appears beside me, now wearing a doctor's coat as she wheels a gurney over. "I'll take him from here," she says, nodding toward the stranger.

Scott obliges, hefting the man named 'Logan' onto the gurney with a heavy thud. I scan the man up and down, noting the absence of visible wounds. "What happened to him?" I ask, my voice tinged with concern.

"He got thrown onto a car, among other things," Scott replies nonchalantly.