There ain't no POV's in this one >:3
The pastor stepped up the stairs and looked into the crowd, which contained Uzi, N, J, Lizzy, and the whole Murder Drones community.
He spread his arms to the millions of drones, some crying, some booing, some cheering, and some standing emotionless.
"Today, we gather to honor and remember a remarkable individual, V. It's never easy to say goodbye to someone we love, especially someone who has touched our lives in so many ways. As we stand here, united in our grief, we also celebrate the second chance at life that V lived— though it may have been a little violent." The pastor started, pointing up to a large tinted glass window of her figure, fighting off the sentinels.
"Killing families was everything to V. She cherished every moment she spent killing off loved ones, and she made it a need to create lasting family trauma. From family gatherings and holidays to everyday moments shared over a meal, V always found a way to kill them off as they celebrated. She was a loving maid, but a murderous disassembly drone. Her love for her teammates was obscure in everything he did, though in the end, she showed her true care for her friends. Though her absence now leaves a void that can never be filled."
A loud bawling sentenced from the crowd as they looked to see N with his visor in his hands, Uzi comforting him.
"You know she is going to burst in through that window any second. Her body isn't even in the casket." She reassured him, patting his back.
"V's legacy is one of prosperity, violence, and unwavering strength. Her life was a testament to the power of a kind word, a helping hand, and a heart full of compassion. As we say our final goodbyes, let us carry forward the lessons she taught us and strive to be the kind of person she was—someone who would lay down their life to save the one's of other. Somebody who knows how to care."
"That was my bestie!" Lizzy said from the audience, getting up to take a selfie in front of her casket as the pastor continued.
"From the moment V entered this world, a small servant, she was a kind and shy drone. When she had a fresh new life however, she turned into a murderer and tried again as that. She changed in the end, however, which is what matters most. She changed to a personality that brought joy and light to everyone around her. The last smile she made, was so infectious and warm. Though she wasn't great in the start her personality at the end of her sacrifice made it easy for people to gravitate towards her. Whether it was N, or Uzi, or the fandom, V had an innate ability to make others feel valued and appreciated. She had a genuine interest in taking the lives of those around her, and she always took the time to listen to their screams of pain as they slowly died."
"Yeah. Yeah no that's a good photo." Lizzy interrupted once more, walking back to her seat, facing her phone the whole time.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP LIZZY!" J snapped, pulling out her claws as she whipped around to face her.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. You weren't invited to this funeral how did you even get here?"
J pointed somewhere into the audience, "Because those are the Oilrose shippers who want me to make-out with her casket."
"THEY WANTED ME TO RAPE HER DEAD BODY!" N wailed, throwing his head back as he cried. "AND THEN THEY TOLD ME TO FUCK UZI NEXT AS A BEST FOR LAST!"
Uzi shook her head, "They wanted another version of boozy Uzi but with me and V"
The pastor cleared his throat, waving his arms into a motion to go towards the seats as he started again. "In the days and weeks to come, as we navigate our grief, let us find comfort in the knowledge that V's memory will live on. She may be gone, but she will never be forgotten. Her light will continue to shine in the stories we tell, the love we share, and the lives we lead. As we leave this place today, let us do so with hearts full of gratitude for having known V and with a promise to honor her memory in all that we do."
"CAN WE SKIP TO THE ENDING CEREMONY?"
"SHUT UP THAD! JUST BECAUSE SHE TRIED TO KILL YOU IN THE FIRST EPISODE DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN INTERRUPT HER FUNERAL!"
"As we remember V today, let us join hands and hold on to the memories that made her so special to us. Let us recall the screams, the tears, and the last moment with her that we shared. Let us remember the way she made us feel on that very day, and the impact it had on our very lives. Though she may no longer be with us in person, her spirit lives on in the hearts of everyone who had the privilege of knowing him, and the miracle of surviving her presence." The pastor said, leaning over the desk to flip off Thad.
"Despite the challenges and screaming that life threw her way, V remained violent and merciless. She faced every obstacle with courage and never allowed a single drone, child or elder, to stop her from murdering them. Her strength was a source of inspiration to those around her, and her ability to find joy in the screams and cries of innocent drones gave new phobias to us all. V taught us that life is not about the workers we face, but about how we should kill them all and continue to move forward, taking care of every worker out there." The pastor said, looking at the papers.
"That's my girlfriend." J recited, as one of the drones started controlling her body.
"Though V may not be with us anymore, due to being killed of by the sentinels-"
"SHE DESERVED IT!"
Everybody's heads turned to look at who could have "sneakily" yelled out such a thing.
"Wow. That was really... Underwhelming." Tescyn said as she dangled from the ceiling.
"WHO INVITED HER?" Another voice yelled out.
"She did it. Sneaky sneaky." Tescyn said with a grin, twisting her head to look and point at a small drone in the audience.
"Accident?"The drone shrugged hopefully.
The audience paused. "Sounds reasonable enough to me."
A sudden crushing sound as V, who was riding the red eyed sentinel crashed through the window. "I LIVED, BITCHES!"
"Rest in peace, dear V. Your journey may have ended, but your spirit will forever remain a guiding light in our lives."
"I'M RIGHT HERE-"
"OKAY YOU SMALL AI!" A loud voice called from up high in the room. A pair of dentures with a body and a cane was hovering above them all.
"THAT'S ENOUGH BREAKING THE THIRD WALL FOR TODAY! LETS DELETE ALL PRESENCE OF THIS EVER EXISTING, SHALL WE? HERE, LETS GO ON AN ADVENTURE INSTEAD! TO THE GLITCH INN!"
A giant cloud of white light and confetti and everybody disappeared from the room, except for V and the sentinel.
They stared at the empty room before V mumbled, "I'm kinda starting to wish that those dirty things were actually going to happen."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
yo.
I honestly got bored so here you go.
did you like it?
if you didn't then im sorry,
anyways, i gotta write an ACTUALL story now so--
but not until after I take a 30 hour break.
Leave suggestions here <3
This is your weird asf author, Firefly, signing off even though she probably should get back to work. 🫶
YOU ARE READING
Murder drones One shots and More
FanfictionThis is mostly going to consist of Nuzi and other ships, I will very gladly take suggestions, and will make sure to respond to your comments as soon as I can :)
